bad sleeper or is something wrong?

[lilipup]

my 12 mth old dd2 has been a horrendous sleeper from day one, VERY colicky (was diagnosed with silent reflux by one consultant, but then another said probably not) until around 5/6 mths old, constant sucker (exclusivly bf until 8mths old and weaned recently at about 11 mths). brought her into bed increasingly until 9/10mths old she was in our beds during second half of every night. which was fine when she settled, but more and more she wouldn't settle at all and just kept us all awake. we thought it might be hunger so gave her a bottle in the middle of the night, worked for a bit, but then more and more not, still crying. so, in the last 2 weeks, we have been trying controlled crying - absolutely last resort, but she has been driving us close to mad during the night. we've had some better nights it has to be said, but still regular nights when she wakes up and screams, goes back to sleep again after about 20mins or so, then wakes up again after half an hour or so, on and on. just woke up there now at 9pm despite having calpol at 8pm before bedtime! is there something up with her somewhere (i often wonder if tummy pains or something), or is it just a case of a bad sleeper and she'll grow out of it? any tips?

[singyswife]

She has got into the habit of being soothed to sleep and now cannot soothe herself. Try going to bed with something (a teddy/doll/ pillwcase) for a few nights and then put it in the cot beside her. When she wakes give it to her and pat her on the back. Gradually reduce the patting until she has learned to go to sleep on her own. The fact that she has something that smells like you and daddy should help to soothe her, Worked for me anyway,

[lilipup]

yes, mostly i think its a habit thing, as she is absolutely fine during the day (a bit moaney, but nothing major). i've actually tried putting my nightdress in her cot tied to the railing before, but no difference. sometimes feel might go potty with her, she just cried out again there now, and not even down for 2 hours yet! arrrgggghhh

[IAteMakkaPakka]

I can sympathise lilipup. I also remember how long the night seemed when I was little, and how much worse everything seemed than during the daytime - every blocked nose, sore tummy, cold foot seemed a million times worse in the night. I guess because there are no other distractions.

Mine's 16 months and very much like yours. It's incredibly frustrating but I have found more and more he won't settle in bed with us so I take him through to his room and tell him he can go in his cot but if he gets upset I'll pick him up again. So I put him in it, he cries, I cuddle him until he's settled and then he usually points or asks to go in the cot again. Maybe this is the case with your DD, she's just unable to say what she wants yet?

If you're anything like me you're probably not at your most patient at 4 in the morning when totally exhausted, and I know if I let it get to me DS picks up on it and gets worked up. The nights he settles best are often the nights I've abandoned hope of getting any sleep and resigned myself to doing whatever he wants.

I really hope what you're doing helps you get some more sleep, but I also think bad sleepers are just bad sleepers and they're easily disturbed by whatever's bothering them (usually teeth or wind for us). I feel better having accepted that it will be a long time before DS sleeps through. In the meantime if i get a 4 or 5 hour stretch in the night I am delighted. And I feel less stressed all the time now I'm resigned to that!

Hope for your sake she decides that she's going to sleep 12 hours through from tonight onwards! Much sympathy

[ches]

Is she about to start walking? Development can really muck up the sleep of some. What about teething? Molars are a different kettle of fish to the incisors.

[Pinkjenny]

Iatemakkapakka - I'm with you. I have shed ridiculous amounts of tears over dd's sleep. I am now completely resigned to the fact that she is just a rubbish sleeper (not helped by me and my inconsistency). She is the same at the moment lillipup, but I think her top canines are coming through, so have been applying copious amounts of teething gel during the night.

I try to console myself with the thought that it won't last forever. Which someimes works. Other times I want to hide under the bed.

[lilipup]

i keep telling myself its one reason or the other (teething, wind from something she ate etc etc), but in all honesty, she has been a terrible sleeper since birth, so i think probably she is just a rubbish sleeper too, which doesn't appear to be uncommon! although i always have a niggling doubt in the back of my mind that something is causing her discomfort somewhere. i am noticing progress over the past 8 nights though, as we've just stopped taking her out of the cot COMPLETELY, and i think it may be having a bit of an impact. suspect it will take a month or so for her to finally get the message. and, i'm not callous and unfeeling, i am very much aligned to the dr sears approach to babies, but honestly, this little one has pushed us to the limit, and when you can't function during the day at work, something has got to change.