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DS1 is throwing up during the night, just to MAKE us take him to our bed!!! So tired. Has anyone gone through this? Please tell me it will end.

(27 Posts)
TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 10:25:06

DS1 is 3.9 years old. He has always woken up very early, but used to sleep through the night.

For the past month or so, he is waking up during the night crying and wanting to be with us. We didn't want to encourage it,so we always put him back in his bed and waited until he went back to sleep. I also tried ignoring.

A couple of weeks ago, I was trying to ignore him and see if he went back, but he actually threw up. I felt awful as he was obviously not feeling well. So I cleaned the floor and took him to bed with us because he was sick.
Since then, he wakes up every night and he screams, if we don't take him to bed with us, he makes himself sick, so I have no choice but to take him to our bed.

We are so tired, do you have any suggestions? Please...
Oh, just wanted to add, that he has a general delay in his development (neurological problems), his speech is very delayed and so it is difficult for me to discuss his feelings with him.

TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 13:15:03

just bumping a little here...

HairyMaclary Tue 14-Oct-08 13:22:50

can you change the sheets on his bed in the night and put him back in it, staying with him if necessary. We do this with Ds1 if he wets the bed, not quite the same I know but it may work. My Ds is on a full size bed but has a child's duvet that I can wash, that helps!

TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 13:22:58

goodness, it has taken no less than 30 seconds for this little post of mine to go to the end of the pile.
some busy mumsnetters here!!

anyone else has to deal with nightime puke?

MissKubelik Tue 14-Oct-08 13:33:58

agree with Hairy Maclary - I would just change the sheets and put him back in his own bed. Get a waterproof cover for the mattress and maybe a spare duvet in case one gets wet. I also put thick towels down if my DD has been sick, so if she does it again I can just chuck them straight in the washing machine.

My DD is a similar age and quite often has bad dreams and long crying fits in the middle of the night. We keep her in her own room and one of us will stay with her until she settles down. She is genuinely frightened and often won't go back to sleep unless her bedside light is on. It is exhausting! Dealing with sick as well must be awful - you have my sympathies!

TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 13:42:18

sorry HairyMaclary... crossed posts.

Thanks for your answers.
So both of you think I need to put him back in his bed.
It is just so tiring waiting for him to go back to sleep, sometimes it takes 45 minutes of sitting there waiting for him to sleep.

I just want to SLEEEEEP.
Sorry for the rant. Dealing with the lack of sleep is without a doubt the worst thing I've had to do.

Thanks for your thoughts!!

ADragonIs4LifeNotJustHalloween Tue 14-Oct-08 13:43:44

Don't take him to bed if he's sick.

ADragonIs4LifeNotJustHalloween Tue 14-Oct-08 13:44:42

to your bed.

Strip his bed, put clean sheets on and put him back. More than once if necessary.

I would stop the sitting there waiting for him to go back to sleep too, TBH.

ListersSister Tue 14-Oct-08 13:45:19

My dd2 used to make herself be sick deliberately. We thought of it as a very clever manipulation by a bright child if that helps? Seriously, she used to do it when we did time out with her, so we had to go and deal with her and couldn't withdraw out attention iykwim?
In the end, after trying sympathy, which just encouraged her, clearing her up but giving minimal attention which just made her do it again, we resorted to just handing her a bowl when she started, telling her to aim in it, and walking away. After a couple of days of this she stopped (although I recognise she could have thwarted that by vomiting in it and them throwing it around, but luckily she didn't!). I think it was shock that we weren't bothered that made her stop.
I think we have iron will though, as she is a very, erm, testing kind of a child smile.
I am not sure that approach would work at night, when one is not at one's most resolute and clear-thinking.
However, I do offer sympathy - it is not a nice one to deal with. In fact I recall in the Toddler Taming book that the author feels quite useless when presented with a child who vomits on demand...

misselizabethbennet Tue 14-Oct-08 13:51:11

If my DS wakes in the night I always bring him in bed with me. If there's still a lot of night to go, DH will get into DS's bed for the rest of the night so we can all sleep peacefully.

However, he does only wake occasionally (once every few weeks) so no massive hardship or bad habits being formed.

We had about a year of semi-regular bed wetting and we usually put him back in his own bed then, although if he woke properly and wanted to come in with me I let him. No bad habits formed - he is now 6 and no sleep problems.

TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 13:52:53

ListerSister: "clever manipulation by a bright child" smile smile

DS1 is a cheeky monkey, he has neurological problems but knows how to play his cards when he needs to! Clever cheeky monkey.

Dragon: but if I don't sit there, he will go on and on for over 2 hours. It is hell. The next day I just cannot function. Poor DH helps, but he has to go to work the next day.

I am about to give up and just put a matriz in my room and let him sleep on the floor.

TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 13:55:26

misliz: If he woke up once in a while, even once a week, I wouldn't mind him coming to bed with us, but it's happening everyday.

Do you think that if I just let him sleep with us he will eventually grow out of it?

pagwatch Tue 14-Oct-08 13:55:38

it is a ashock when you realise that , not only can your child vomit at will , but thatthey will do so for strategic reasons.

When DS2 did this ( and other stuff too gross to discuss) the advice I was given was to not provide any attention .
So I had a stash of clean sheets and towels. when he did it I would strip bed ( without talking to him - not even to admonish) and then put him straight back to bed.
it worked very quickly. Once he got zilch response he stopped doing it.

Prufrock Tue 14-Oct-08 13:59:26

I had a similar situation to listerssister - dd procrastinated greatly about going to bed when she was 2.5, so we put a gate over the top of the stairs and were playing hardball. She upped the stakes by vomiting exorcist style down the stairs. It took me a couple of days to realise she was doing it on purpose and wasn't actually ill, so she'd already had lots of attention and cuddles. You have to be firm, or it will just continue. We solved it by being very matter of fact - If she yelled "I need to be sick" I'd go upstairs, take her into the bathroom and tell her "here's the loo, if you want to be sick go on" and I would stand outside the bathroom, with my back to the doorway, struggling with the impulse to turn around and comfort her when the retching noises got really loud. It only took 3 nights of that for her to stop.

TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 14:00:50

Oh really pagwatch???
"it worked very quickly" is exactly what I wanted to hear. THANK YOU SO SO MUCH.

Okay, I think I shall attempt this tonight. Will have to take turns with DH, otherwise I don't think I'll survive.

Thank you all.

ListersSister Tue 14-Oct-08 14:06:01

Good luck TinySocks smile

Solidarity with Pagwatch and Prufrock lol!

Lucky old us to have such, erm, resourceful children eh?

bozza Tue 14-Oct-08 14:06:07

A trick I read on here with children who are bedwetting was to make bed up with usual mattress cover and a sheet. Then add anotherr waterproof cover or a pampers caresheet, then another sheet. Then if child messes first sheet, just strip off sheet and mattress cover and the bed is ready. Assuming duvet and pillow are Ok or can be replaced.

Prufrock Tue 14-Oct-08 14:06:27

I would try taking him to the bathroom when he starts screaming tbh, then you don't have the fuss of changing bedclothes.

TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 14:10:19

It's not only the bed that gets dirty, it's also the floor. It's a huge mess I tell you. I'll have to have my bucket and mop ready.
And a good nose clip.

LazyLinePainterJane Tue 14-Oct-08 14:19:24

Tinysocks is there something you can put down on the floor? I would get a couple of double flat sheets and spread them out around his bed. When you have to change his sheets, gather them up and stick in machine.

Good luck.

TinySocks Tue 14-Oct-08 17:29:28

Good idea Painter Jane. Thanks xx

pagwatch Tue 14-Oct-08 17:32:48

good luck tiny socks grin

ListersSister Fri 17-Oct-08 11:27:45

How is everything TinySocks?

ListersSister Sun 19-Oct-08 21:02:11

Are you about TinySocks?

TinySocks Mon 20-Oct-08 07:17:29

Hi ListersSister,
Thank you for remembering me, sorry I just saw your message.

Hurray, I was successful, thanks to all your tips. [very very happy emotion]

First night, I cleaned up, not making a big fuss and put him back in his bed. I had to put him back in his bed over and over again for one hour. He woke up three more times that night (not throwing up), and I just kept putting him back in his bed.

The following day he woke up three times during the night(but didn't throw up), I just put him back in bed over and over again.

Since then he has been sleeping like an angel.

He still wakes up very early (5:15), but that's a different problem.

I feel like a new person!
Thank you all.

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