Talk

Advanced search

Controlled Crying Starting Tonight

(29 Posts)
suzanneandjojo Tue 01-Mar-05 19:32:42

My daughter is 5 months old and has been waking once in night at 4am for ages. I have now stopped her milk intake at this time and she just wakes to be comforted. She stays awake for at least an hour and will only go back to sleep if held for a long time. She goes down at 7pm in her cot awake and is asleep by 5 past. I am going to start cc tonight any advice or is anybody else doing it at the momement? She eats very well in ay so i know she doesent need food in the night.

franch Tue 01-Mar-05 19:35:31

I thought cc wasn't advised before 6 months? I do sympathise however - DD was a horror up to about 11 months

suzanneandjojo Tue 01-Mar-05 19:44:02

Dr Richard Ferber says ok to start if child is at least 5 months old I bought his book today and have read it from cover to cover in preperation. I hope he is right cos i am not feeling good about it already

franch Tue 01-Mar-05 19:50:56

Oh, I'm glad to hear that - for some reason I had 6 months in my head. I trust the Ferber book so go with that and DON'T feel bad - I know I felt awful - we did Ferber's wimp's version with DD at about 10/11 months and it wasn't anything like as bad as I'd expected (although we'd done Tracy Hogg's pick up/put down for a week or two before that so I think DD was beginning to get the hint that things were changing!). It really didn't take long, we didn't have any awful traumas with it, and DD has ended up an absolute star sleeper - not a peep from 7pm to about 8am these days. Before that things had got so bad (post teething etc.) that she sometimes didn't sleep for longer than about an hour or two at a time, and regularly was up for a solid couple of hours in the early hours of the morning. It was hell. I'm expecting another in Sept and if things get bad with this one I'll do CC MUCH earlier.

Good luck

beansontoast Tue 01-Mar-05 19:54:01

no advice just good luck.

binkybetsy Tue 01-Mar-05 19:55:35

Go for it, & good luck!
It is very hard but once you start it's really important you don't cave, otherwise as I'm sure you will have read it all goes even further tits up!
I'm such a chicken however, I got my mum to do the first night at her house with both of mine (both 5mo) and I did the 2nd and 3rd nights. It didn't take any more than this, and each night it was easier!
Still you'll be glad you did it if you manage to stick with it.
Just imagine A FULL NIGHTS SLEEP !!!!!

suzanneandjojo Wed 02-Mar-05 16:59:27

I confess I chickened out
But dd went to sleep at 7pm had a dream feed at 10pm then slept till 5am i was so pleased with her for sleeping through till then i just picked her up and she went back to sleep so i let her get in my bed. How bad can it get. But dh was on a night shift and i couldn't face it on my own. We have had a chat and are going to try again tonight together.

nnosam Wed 02-Mar-05 17:00:31

no adivce either just good luck.

hermykne Wed 02-Mar-05 19:37:08

suzanne
i am the same except ds is 7mths, i am a softie, he too looks for the comfort of it.
i breast feed him so my trick now is to offer a bottle anytime he wakes after his night feed at 7pm and he is refusing it and going back to sleep.
i hope this tactic works

binkybetsy Wed 02-Mar-05 19:44:47

Strange as it seems, but you have to be mentally ready for this yourself. If your dd sleeping until 5am is fine for you then go with that and tackle it again if it becomes an issue further down the line.
I had no choice but to sleep train as I was returning to work and I don't do particularly well on disturbed sleep. I just wouldn't have been able to cope at all, I know it!
I also know I couldn't do it without Dh in bed beside me, we both ended up holding hands and weeping under the duvet .
Good Luck!

Amberlilli Wed 02-Mar-05 20:36:32

I used the cc method with both my girls-the eldest is nearly six. I used to feed her(breast) until she fell asleep, then inevitabley she would wake up two hours later, look round wonder where she was -and I was and scream. So I would go through the process again.
At about six months I put her in her own room, in her cot and one night I just left her-......after two hours of screaming she eventually fell asleep.
It was the hardest thing I've ever done and it broke my heart, but my xh was very supportive (one of the few occaisions) and he physically stopped me going to her.
It seemed so cruel and the physical pain is something only a mum will understand. However, after about a week she was sleeping through. It was only buggered up when xh left me and dd1 came in bed with me!!
With my second girl I ALWAYS put her down awake-learnt by mistakes- and at about six months again-when I knew she wasn't hungry or uncomfortable I left her to cry and it worked again.
Now every time teething or illnesses occur and the routine is upset we go back again to cc- grit our teeth and sit it out!
H2 has found it hard- he doesn't like to hear his little girl crying but you have to be strong- ITS SO WORTH A NIGHTS SLEEP!!!

hercules Wed 02-Mar-05 20:37:44

but that isnt cc is it? surely cc is done in stages?

sacha3taylor Wed 02-Mar-05 20:44:44

I did CC at 8.5 months. My DS was waking 3 or 4 times a night and we knew he was eating enough to sustain me, let alone an 8 month baby I imagined it would be alot harder than it was. The first night he woke up at 10 and 4 o clock and was back asleep within 10 minutes both times! 2nd night he only woke at 3 o clock for 5 minutes and then he has slept through every night since (about a month) I dont know if anyone else has had this, but i have felt tireder since i have been getting a good nights sleep than when i was getting up 3 or 4 times!!!!!!!! I 'm sure all will be fine and good luck

Amberlilli Thu 03-Mar-05 08:42:30

You are probably right Hercules. I've read so many different methods in different books-but this way worked for me. It's definitely not for everyone and like everything it's trial and error.
How are yougetting on Suzanneandjojo?

suzanneandjojo Thu 03-Mar-05 15:53:07

I am very pleased with myself and dd. She woke up at 4am, it took 1 x 5 min, 1 x 10 min and then 2x 15 mins and she had fell back asleep. 45 mins in total. Was very pleased. dh and myself agreed that on going down at 7pm, 6am would be an acceptable time to get up. She woke up at 05.59 so we let her get up anyway! She later went onto have an hour and half nap mid morning in her cot going down to sleep within 2 mins. I used my personal CD player on very loud so could not hear crying when leaving her I let dh listen instead. This is only way i could have managed. Fingers crossed for tonight.

suzanneandjojo Fri 04-Mar-05 09:15:01

DD woke last night / this morning at 05.35, she talked to herself for 10mins and then we let her cry for 10 mins then 15 and then we got up at 06.30. I am very pleased with her CC seems to be working and not too traumatic.

Rosaleen Tue 08-Mar-05 15:41:35

Hi my second daughter is 19 months old and needs a bottle to go to sleep she wakes during night and is not eating well during the day! I know she is having too much milk....oh for a night's sleep? Any suggestions? Tempted to try this controlled crying don't know if I am strong enough! If it would work she will cry so hard and be unconsolable and want picked up? Need some encouragement to try it.

laneydaye Tue 08-Mar-05 19:05:20

how do i do cc? and mydd is 4.2mths is it too early?

sacha3taylor Tue 08-Mar-05 19:14:58

I heard somewhere that 5 monthes is the earliest you should try but I'm sure other people will know for sure.

suzanneandjojo Wed 09-Mar-05 20:17:04

Rosaleen, I feel for your situation i think i had it easier cos DD is only young and cannot talk or call out but look at it as teaching her a new skill. I had to listen to music on earphones to get through each 5mins. it has been 7days since starting CC and now DD goes to sleep within 3mins and wakes briefly in the night once lets out a cry and then goes back to sleep within the same minute I havent found it stessful because of the fact she is now happy to go in her cot. She has even started sleeping for 2 hours at dinner time in her cot which was unheard of before. Good Luck and try and get support from others to help you. I also bought Dr Ferbers book so i could know all the facts before i started that way i did it proper and knew i wasent just been cruel.

suzanneandjojo Wed 09-Mar-05 20:17:04

Rosaleen, I feel for your situation i think i had it easier cos DD is only young and cannot talk or call out but look at it as teaching her a new skill. I had to listen to music on earphones to get through each 5mins. it has been 7days since starting CC and now DD goes to sleep within 3mins and wakes briefly in the night once lets out a cry and then goes back to sleep within the same minute I havent found it stessful because of the fact she is now happy to go in her cot. She has even started sleeping for 2 hours at dinner time in her cot which was unheard of before. Good Luck and try and get support from others to help you. I also bought Dr Ferbers book so i could know all the facts before i started that way i did it proper and knew i wasent just been cruel.

franch Wed 09-Mar-05 20:26:27

laneydaye, as I think I've said below please don't attempt CC without reading the chapter in Richard Ferber's book (Solve your child's sleep problems). And yes I'm afraid I think 4.2months is too early - you have my sympathy tho

laneydaye Thu 10-Mar-05 13:23:22

thanks franch, think im gonna try pick up/put down,,,,,,xxxxx

Rosaleen Tue 22-Mar-05 21:46:59

Thanks suzanneandjojo for your words of encouragement. I am just back from 10 days with inlaws on my own as husband away on course D/D screamed place down and nobody got any sleep!!! obviously did not try c/c there!!! but tonight was the night went for it and tried new bedtime routine and although it all went abit belly up time wise d/d went down at 7.30pm and I dried my 3.5 year olds thick hair for 20 minutes not to hear crying and after 30 minutes without bottle she has fallen asleep! So on my second glass of red wine and about to go to bed!!! in for a rough few nights but determined to go through with this and not give in my wee darling has to learn to go asleep herself. Will let you know how I am doing if you like. Anybody else starting tonight?

ja9 Tue 22-Mar-05 21:54:36

hi rosaleen

we started officially last night. wasnt as grim as i imagined, but my ds is VERY unpredictable just now and so fully expect tonight to be very different. good luck to you. am rubbing my eyes with weariness just thinking about it!! My ds goes to sleep absolutely fine, but is waking several times during night. he's 6.5 mths old.

look forward to hearing how your night was.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now