8 week old DD's "Terrible" bedtime routine

[pigleychez]

Went to baby group yesterday for tr first time only for a lady to comment about my DD's "Terrible sleep routine".
Its now got me questioning my bedtime habits and wondered what you guys thought.

DD is 8 weeks old and we generally put her in her moses basket at about 10 pm. Sometimes she goes straight off, other times can take a good hour to settle herself.

If she goes off to sleep in the moses basket about 11 or 12 then she will go till about 5.30/6 or even 7 ish and when she goes down at 10 then its more 3/4 ish. When we put her to bed in her basket depends when she has her last bottle. ie 9 or 10 pm.

She tends to have a longish sleep of 5/6 hours but after that feed its back to the normal 3/4 hours.. so for example 10 till 3 then 6 then 9.

Weve been debating putting her down earlier at 7/8 but then she will have her long sleep while we are awake downstairs and then we will be up every 3 hours with her during the night. At least if she goes at 10/11 we get the benefit from her long sleep period. Is that being selfish? blush DD is usually asleep in her rocker in the evening so we still get quiet evenings but her sleep isnt her deep night sleep IYKWIM.

Anyway... This lady was saying she should be in bed by 7 and should be going 12 hours by now! shock Shes only 8 weeks old and I dont know of any baby going that long. In fact id be worried if she went that long without a feed!
She was saying I needed to put her down earlier and thats she will never go to bed before 11 if I dont start now. She seemed very shocked.

Just wondering how much of a bad mummy ive been by giving her such a "terrible" routine.

[rivenhasaparrotonhershoulder]

ignore that woman. Sounds fine what you are doing
She's 8 weeks old! Mine went from 11 to 6 at this age and that was pretty lucky!
You're not a bad mummy.

[cmotdibbler]

If you are happy and LO is happy, then its no problem at all. At 8 weeks we didn't have any sort of routine - in fact DS didn't have a 'bedtime' till he was 12 months old or so (and he fell into that himself).

[TheProvincialLady]

The woman is a nutter, ignore her. And get used to it - the world is full of people who want to tell you to do things differently with your child. If you are happy that something works for you (and is safe, etc) then that should be enough. You don't need anyone else's approval.

8 week old babies sleeping 12 hours, pah!

[2cats2many]

The woman you were speaking to was talking out of her arse.

My dd didn;t have a bedtime 'routine' until she was about 5 months old and she sleeps 7-7 now, no problems. 8 weeks is far too early to be worrying about it IMO.

Just do whatever is right for you all.

[yelnats]

Sounds absolutely fine what you are doing!! She is full of crap!

My dd1 spelt right through from very early but by right through I mean from 11pm till about 7am. Now dd2 was a different matter altogether - though both mine went to bed about 10/11 at this age. I had same mind as you - would rather benefit from the longer sleep period while we were actually asleep too.

[ninja]

We did put my DD to bed at 7 and liem your her 'big' sleep for a while was 5/6 hours - so until 2!! Your routine sounds a LOT better.

I guess in time if you manage to extend either end of the night you'll have the perfect night time.

You sound like you're pretty sensible about this.

[malovitt]

Do what suits you, and don't worry.

I always used to put mine to bed at 10-ish, otherwise their dad would never have seen them awake.

They have not suffered any ill effects and now sleep like logs.

[ghosty]

That woman is a twonk. Sleeping 12 hours by 8 weeks? Who was she, GinablimminFord???
11 to 5 or 6 is just brilliant, well done your DD!

[Becky77]

My DD has always gone down at around 7pm because in the beginning we were so knackered we wanted to get as much sleep as possible... It ended up that I went to be at 7pm (co-sleeping) until she was about 8 weeks old and by then I was getting bored of it and wanted some evening time back... I was missing my soap fix! Luckily I had been being overly cautious and she didn't stir at all if got out of bed rolls eyes at self

But I do have friends who've done it your way and it does make for a better nights sleep earlier on for them.

Both ways the babies sleep will extend to cover it... You'll just have to edge it further forward and we'll just have to hope it edges further the other way in time

[Surfermum]

Don't listen to her. There is no right or wrong. You "should" or "shouldn't" do anything, you must do whatever you think is right, feels right and what suits your baby and you. Just because it's the way she does it, that doesn't mean it's the way everyone has to.

DD also had a similar sleep pattern to yours. For a long time she went to bed with us at 10/11 and would sleep through until 7/8.

You're doing great.

[pigleychez]

Thanks Ladies,

Your replys make me feel alot more confident that im not doing things drastically wrong!

Last night DD went to sleep at 11 and didnt wake till 7.15! Fine by me!
I fed her then by 8am she had fallen asleep beside me in bed so I had a lovely lay in snuggled up next to her. She slept for about an hour and is now wide awake playing on her playmat

The plan is to eventually slowly bring her bedtime forward as she starts sleeping longer.

Thanks again ladies

[pudding25]

Do you know what I can't bloody stand - is people telling you what to do when you have not asked for advice. Tell her to go fuck off. Whether she is right or wrong (insane), what right does she have to dictate to you? Stupid cow. I bet you wish you could go back in time and tell her to shove her advice up her backside.

We did start putting dd to bed at 7pm from around 4wks but that was because I am a routine person and I wanted some time in the evening. It did take a few wks to get her to do that - but she has only just started sleeping through from a dreamfeed at 11pm at 4mths.

Good luck and enjoy your sleep!

[thebutlerdidit]

Unfortunately there are loons who will critise every choice you make. It starts off with breast and bottle feeding, feeding on demand vs a routine, sleep and naps and will go on right through your dds life when people will judge you on whether you do or don't let her walk to secondary school with her friends, what activities she does (appropriateness, too many, too few). If she goes to uni they will say either the uni isn't the right one or that uni in general is a waste of time. If she doesn't you will be told that you have failed her and she is ruining her life. Then they will judge her relationships because she will either be living in sin, tied to a marriage and loosing her independence, or left on the shelf. You cannot win with these people so just ignore them. I'm sure she will have plenty of pearls of wisdom when you start weaning.

As for the sleeping I have never heard of an 8wk baby sleeping for 12 hours. I put mine down at 7pm and at 8 wks they generally woke one at about 2-3am then again at 7am. They were sleeping 12 hours at around 5 months which is generally considered quite early. I am on my own in the evenings and it suited me to have them in bed early, but that is not the case with every family. She will get to a point when she needs to have a long stretch of sleep and for most people it is better if that is 7-7 or 8-8 rather than 11-11, but 8 weeks isn't at that stage yet.