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Don't know how to get my 2yo to sleep through - any advice please?

(32 Posts)
olivo Sun 31-Aug-08 13:52:18

my dd, just turned 2, used to be a reasonable sleeper. she has always been an early waker but goes off to sleep fine on her own so we accept wake-ups. for the last month or so, she has been waking in the night, anytime between 11.30 and 3 and shouting out. we have tried a night light,lying her back down without speaking, cuddle and 'go back to sleep, teddy is with you', etc etc. once or twice i have resorted to sitting by her cot till she (after a very long time) falls asleep again.
I don;t know what to do. I feel she is just wanting company and part of me wants to leave her to shout, but even with going in to her, these episodes can last around an hour and a half (and she still wakes early!)
I am exhausted, so if anyone can offer any advice, i'd be really grateful.

sjcmum Sun 31-Aug-08 14:17:41

Friend of mine had a dd who was always a brilliant sleeper - suddenly started doing similar to this at that age. They even resorted to one of them sleeping on a mattress outside the bedroom door etc at one point. They did the whole controlled crying thing, which gradually seemed to work. Eventually the length of time she was awake in the night decreased, but it did take a while. Not much help though initially as the shouting/crying will undoubtedly keep you awake....

Could you try moving her to a big bed if she is still in a cot?? (with stair gate on bedroom door to stop her coming and poking you...!)

olivo Sun 31-Aug-08 14:45:49

we are just sorting out a bed for her at the moment but it wont be ready for a couple of weeks. i think we may have to follow the controlled crying route - thing is, its not crying, it's just shouting with the odd scream for effect. she will dive down and look as though she is sleeping when either of us goes in to her angry

amidaiwish Sun 31-Aug-08 14:52:17

oh DD2 went through a phase of this.
Would your DD respond to a star chart with a treat when she has slept through for x number of days or is she still a bit too young? (works for DD2 but she is almost 3)

She doesn't sound distressed when she wakes - just wants you to come into her? Maybe something like this lumiloves would help. It helps DD, they change colour all night long like a lava lamp and seem mildly hypnotic.

or is she becoming aware of her wee - check if her nappy is hot next time she wakes. We only really cracked the nighttime waking once DD was dry all night.

when you move her into a bed get a stairgate on the door straight away. Otherwise she is going to have a field day once she realises she can come into you.

olivo Sun 31-Aug-08 18:29:07

hmmm, she might respond to stickers, it has worked for going to the loo. she's only just gone two so i think a star chart might be a bit confusing. it could be an awareness of weeing though, she is suddenly very aware of this in the day. i'm pretty sure that it's the company she wants once she's awake!
I have bought a peppa pig night light that she could do herself by pushing it but worry that she may keep herself awake playing with it. will check out the lumiloves one.

we have the stairgate ready and waiting !grin

Mogsmum Mon 01-Sep-08 12:58:49

My DS is 3 on Fri and he still wakes several times over night. Usually only for about 5 minutes. He's in a bed, has a stairgate at the door, toilet (?) trained during the day only and just seems to want to know that someone will come if he shouts. We have become used to broken nights sleep, but it's a drag. It doesn't help you, Olivo, but I too would be grateful for some advice!! Especially as he still wakes at 0530 sad

Mogsmum Mon 01-Sep-08 12:58:53

My DS is 3 on Fri and he still wakes several times over night. Usually only for about 5 minutes. He's in a bed, has a stairgate at the door, toilet (?) trained during the day only and just seems to want to know that someone will come if he shouts. We have become used to broken nights sleep, but it's a drag. It doesn't help you, Olivo, but I too would be grateful for some advice!! Especially as he still wakes at 0530 sad

CatIsSleepy Mon 01-Sep-08 13:05:09

dd has started doing this recently-she is 2y4m
sometimes she settles down again very quickly
but sometimes as soon as I get back into my room she starts shouting-like a real tantrum and at this point becomes very hard to calm down
this happened last night-twice-at 2 and 3.30 in the end we just left her to shout it out
took about ten minutes of shrieking before she calmed down

no idea what it's about but it's certainly a bit trying especially on a work night
the really annoying thing is she did this all last week til friday meaning I was knackered all week at work, then was fine over the weekend-then decides to do it again on sunday night...

as a long term strategy I don't really know what to do. we are also thinking of getting her a proper bed soon and I don't know if that will make things better or worse..

olivo Mon 01-Sep-08 18:15:20

It might sound mean but I feel reassured to hear that it's not just my DD! sorry, that doens't help any of us, does it?!grin
I just find it all so wearing, I'm shattered. i'm back to work tomorrow, supposedly refreshed after the summer break but I feel more tired than at the end of last term!

CatIsSleepy Mon 01-Sep-08 19:44:06

olivo grin

i think it's pretty common at their age from what I've seen on MN and heard from friends

am exhausted today and plan to be in bed by 9 at the fact would quite like to be in bed now...

Mogsmum Mon 01-Sep-08 20:37:59

Well just to add to my sleepless nights DS has decided to go to bed without a nappy tonight. You know how many times I'll be up with him sad

Olivo, don't worry about being mean/unable to help. Sometimes it helps just to know you're not the only one going through it! smile

olivo Tue 02-Sep-08 18:02:55

grin mogsmum, how often were you up last night then?

Mogsmum Tue 02-Sep-08 20:14:14

Well I was given some advice to lift him before I went to bed, but fell asleep reading my book!!! So Ds woke at 0020, wet through and freezing cold! Bless him. Put him back to bed in a nappy, no quibbles as he was still half asleep wink

How was your night, Olivo?

olivo Tue 02-Sep-08 20:28:47

oh bless! DD slept all night and didn't wake till 6.15! the only trouble was, i was awake half the night waiting for her to wake! angry

Mogsmum Tue 02-Sep-08 20:42:53

Oh god I do that - Ds usually wakes up about an hour after I go to bed (some inner clock of his I think, I never go to bed at the same time every night) so I usually lie awake/dozing until he shouts. If he is having one his rare 'I'm gonna sleep all night' episodes I end getting up to check on him! Paranoid mum (that should have been my user name smile).

Oh and Ds didn't wake up til 0630!! A lie in!!

fourlittlefeet Tue 02-Sep-08 20:50:13

mines only 16 months but has suddenly started doing this. she will lie down and be quiet if we take her out of the cot and lie with her in our bed or on her sofa, but screams blue murder in her cot. She seems a bit little for a big bed, but am increasingly thinking its the way forward. unless its nightmares. not really sure. she has just learnt the word wee wee (among tons of others) but says it when we go to her in the night. I think she can't be realising its wee yet.

we are dealing with it by lying with her until she is deeply asleep, then moving her back to her cot. this morning that was 4.30 to 6.30 - she slept til 8 and I had to leave for work angry. should definitely be in bed now.

Mogsmum Tue 02-Sep-08 21:12:41

FLF - don't have any advice at the mo just a couple of questions.... tell me to just up if I'm teaching you to suck eggs. Went through something very similar when my DS was about this age...

- is she warm enough? DS at this age only slept in long sleeve T and gro-bag and kept waking at 0400, finally figured out he was cold and switched to duvet!!

- Other thing is is she hungry. DS also used to wake if he hadn't eaten a decent tea because he was tired, even though he had a bedtime time bottle of milk. Increased his milk by an ounce for a bit and that helped.

- Ref the nightmares, could be. What makes you think this?

- Ref the wee wee, have you checked her nappy when she says this? Is it wet and warm? I still have to change DS once a night - he pees so much! If he sleeps through - ha - his pj's are usually soaking in the morning.

Sorry not much. Do sympathise, it's hell trying to work on a few hours sleep.

fourlittlefeet Wed 03-Sep-08 13:21:25

Thanks Mogs, will go through the list. Am absolutely desperate too! Thought it might be nightmares as apparently (?! - too much reading on my part) they can start at this age. will work on the cold thing too.

Mogsmum Wed 03-Sep-08 13:27:43

FLF - no problem, hope things start getting better. grin

fourlittlefeet Thu 04-Sep-08 20:40:51

not cold; in a fleecy babygro and 2.5 tog growbag (not hot either).

not hungry; very happy to go to sleep anywhere if I am next to her.

still screams for some time, even after we pick her up, and seems to have her eyes closed. We have to take her to the light and wake her up fully to stop the crying.

have had no more wee wee references so don't think its that.

grr. 9.30 til 11 and 5.30 then got up this morning.

any more ideas?

empressorchid Fri 05-Sep-08 10:20:24

Hi FLF, sorry things are still working out. I don't know what to suggest next...

It's knackering and I've never done it but have you tried controlled crying, you might need a week of work though if you're going to be kept awake by DD screaming. I couldn't do controlled crying, hated the thought of DS screaming and me just lying there but it worked for a friend of mine.

You could try a bed, another friend put her DS into a bed when he was about 1 as he was a really restless sleeper and kept banging his head on the cot bars. She still gets up with him a couple of times but hasn;t had any major problems.

I'm sorry useless advice as my DS just likes a cuddle and will go back down woth no problems.... hopefully someone who knows what they're talking about will be along soon.

Keep your chin up. One day you'll get your own back by hoovering outside her door at 7 in the morning when she has a hangover grin

empressorchid Fri 05-Sep-08 10:22:18

FLF , sorry should have said 'things are not working out. And by the way it's Mogsmum, changed my user name!!

fourlittlefeet Fri 05-Sep-08 18:14:10

thanks for coming back empress. like you, could not do controlled crying. I am going to give her one more week in case its teething, then try mattress on the floor (in case its a cot thing). If that works, I'll get her a bed.

Like the hoovering idea!

empressorchid Fri 05-Sep-08 19:13:20

Good luck and keep us posted as to how things are going.

fourlittlefeet Sat 06-Sep-08 11:05:26

Well, one good night last night; down at 8 and heard little peeps at 6 which I ignored. Woke at 8 to quiet chuntering and happy waking sounds. I hope it was just teething and we are out of the worst... though a good night's sleep after 10 broken ones does make you feel sooo much better!

we shall see...

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