"Research shows" - baby in room for 6 months - why?(25 Posts)
I am thinking about putting PFB in his own room very shortly as he is INCREDIBLY noisy and disturbing my already fractured sleep so much I can hardly see some days, plus he is nearly out of his moses basket and space is going to be an issue if we want him to stay - but of course I am concerned about doing so due to the recommendation to keep babies in with you for their first 6 months.
I have tried to find out where this advice comes from and how does keeping them in with you help - but all I can find is that "research shows it is best" - which is not terribly helpful.
Does anyone know why it is best? Is it because you can keep an eye on them? I mean, to be honest, if DS just stopped breathing in the night I don't think I would notice any more if he was next to me than if he was in the next room. Is there something more to it?
I am also wondering how much 'research' has been done into this - SIDs is relatively rare, so do they really have enough information to say that keeping babies in with you reduces the risk?
I know it sounds like I am just looking for someone to say it is OK for me to put him in another room, and maybe that's true, but having tried to look into the justification for the recommendation I am now really, really curious as to the basis on which it is made.
Ican't cite references but have seen them. For me,it just felt weird putting baby alone after him/her being inside me for 9 mths. And no,I didn't sleep properly for years but figured was v. small price to pay.
I have no idea why it is 'best' but would suggest you do what is best for you at this point in time, and if that means moving ds into his own room then so be it.
I moved dd when she was about 4 months, but that was more because I was a lazy arse and didn't want to be traipsing round in the middle of the night
How old is ds?
Have you looked up the SIDS charity website? I can't link you to the research but I have looked at it and it seemed plausible. I don't think there's any hard evidence about how it works, just stats that show fewer young babies die if they are in their parents' rooms. One theory is that hearing the parents' breathing reminds the baby to breathe (at a subconscious level).
At any rate, we all do things that suit our circumstances. One of my friends put her ds in his own room when he was only two months old, because he was SO noisy she wasn't getting any sleep at all. He's now a sturdy 5yo.
And if you think about it, it's quite odd, this whole notion of putting tiny babies in rooms of their own. Very recent development - even just a few decades ago, poor families didn't have the room and wealthier families had nannies.
The FSID website has lots of info - some of it quite detailed. The factsheet below is not specific on your question but says that the issues of bedsharing/breastfeeding/sleep position when considered together lead them to their advice. You have to read the lot to find the phrase in the text somewhere!
I put both my kids in their own room on the first night home from hospital, with DD that was the same day as she was born.
I had a monitor and the doors between us were open.
They are both great sleepers and always have been and I never had any problems.
Each to their own though.
A baby sleeping in it's own bedroom is at double the risk of SIDS than a baby in with it's parents. The SIDS website link, given above, refers to four research articles stating this which if you google I am sure you will find.
How old is your DS?
Both of my DC went into their own rooms as soon as they came back from hospital. I'm pretty sure - certainly with the oldest, who is nearly 7 - that there was no specific advice on having them in with you. Like Mrs B we had monitors, the doors were open and we were right next door.
In fact, I remember obsessing about mattresses and indeed e-mailing the SIDS helpline about whether I needed a new Moses basket mattress for DD (who is nearly 5) and having no thoughts on this, so I'm pretty sure it has only been elevated to a formal recommendation recently.
As with anything, its a risk assessment. What are your other risk factors like? Both my DCs were big, born at 40 weeks, no respiratory illnesses/conditions in family, no smokers anywhere in the family or visitors, high socio-economic group, so we were good on the other things.
Oh and the advice to BF exclusively to 6 months was only to 4 months when DS was small and he is now tall, slim and omnivorous.
My mum put both me and my sister into a separate room straight away... I have a 3MO DS and couldn't bear to have him in a different room (Am strugling to put him at the end of my bed, instead of the side of it so I can see him constantly)
I don't sleep that well, but I wouldn't sleep well if he was in the next room either.
Agree with MrsBauer - each to their own.
I never understood this I have to say. Obviously, the sleeping on backs etc. makes sense but why it is affected by their physical proximity to you when sleeping I just don't know.
Personally I'd go with the SIDS advice since it based on their research.
I spent my entire childhood not wearing a seatbelt and didn't die or get seriously injured. However, I would not doubt the research that says they save lives and I suspect you wouldn't stop wearing your seatbelt just because I said I'd done it and been safe. Why do it with other life-or-death advice??
At our nct class, the teacher told us it was the breathing thing. to my delight she said as I was having twins, the advice didn't really appply cos they could copy each others breathing instead.
However dh overruled me and we had them in a cot in our room for approx 6 weeks until I put my foot down and put them in own room (right next door to ours). I found it sooo hard to sleep properly when we were sharing. Has been less of a problem when we shared a room on hols.
Sorry bit of a ramble but I'd say go with your gut instinct.
BeHereNow - you're totally right - the FSID advice is exactly because it helps the baby remember to breathe. I put dd in her own room almost immediately, and nearly lost her because she stopped breathing. We had an angelcare monitor though.
<apologises for scary story & gets off high horse>
The research into SIDS does indicate that sleeping in the same room with a newborn (up to 6 months old) reduces the risk of cot death. The rationale cited is that it helps triggers a mother's "instinct" when something does go wrong. Btw - according to Gina Ford of the Contented Baby books, babies should sleep in their own rooms from day one, sleeping in the parents' room only at night.
at mention of G F - can I assume you've not been there that long, Rees?
GXXX XXXX is not a neonatologist or a peadiatrician or a nurse or anything - she's a nanny. No more expert on cot death than I am. And I don't go around flatly contradicting what the experts say without at least looking at the research and explaining my reasons so anyone can choose to ignore me if they wish.
Various aspects of Miss F's advice have been VERY heavily criticised in the past. Thankfully she seems to have updated her claims in recent books. However, given her record of contradicting sound, evidence based advice on issues such as breastfeeding (again, in the past) I'm not personally inclined to take much notice of what she says on where babies should sleep.
All any of us can do is take the advice we get on board and see what works for us.
Personally, I couldn't imagine having DS anyone other than right next to me.
And, personally, I'd never read a 'this is how it's done' parenting book, because anyone who thinks they are so right they can deal with any baby is, quite honestly, wrong.
every baby, like every parent, will find their own way in their own time
Thanks for all the responses, your opinions are very much appreciated.
I have read all 4 of the reports referred to in the SIDs report, and now I am more confused than I was before - but it is fascinating stuff.
One report stated that there is no increased risk in a child sleeping in a separate room except where they live in a house with 1 or more smokers, another says that it is inconclusive due to contributing factors, another is very much about the benefits of co-sleeping - which is also interesting because other studies suggest an increased risk, regardless of whether the parents smoke (which is the biggest risk factor in all cases it seems)especially in babies <4months old - and the final review does suggest a 3 fold increase in risk where a child sleeps in a separate room but I wasn't able to find out where that figure came from or whether it was true for all 'types' of families.
Soooo, I guess it is like many of you have said - it is up to us.
I will miss him if I move him - I love looking over and seeing him, but he spends a good portion of the night (mostly after his 3/4am feed) grunting and kicking and farting, which can get a bit wearing.
Oooo, I don't know what to do now, maybe I will wait it out a couple more weeks (he is 8 weeks at the moment), see whether he gets quieter / I get more used to it, or possibly I will put him in his crib in his room after the 3am feed but have him in the moses basket till then.......I'm sure it will all work out in the end!
What I could never work out was what you do if you have the baby in your room for first 6 months or whatever, so he can get the benefit of 'responding' to your sleep, so you can hear the beginnings of any breathing trouble he has with your mum-radar, etc - but then what happens when you put him to bed and spend the rest of the evening downstairs?? Is SIDS only a risk when you're asleep too? Of course not. Yes, you could use a monitor but it doesn't replicate your breathing presence.
(I spent weeks creeping upstairs to listen at the door every half-hour when we started getting evenings to ourselves. Nowdays I only do it once an evening...)
I bet there must be some sort of baby monitor on the market that also plays a recording of someone breathing. If it doesn't exist, we should make it and sell it!
Oh yes, I remember being woken up by ds kicking and grunting and farting. Made the most peculiar movements and noises.
I can look back at it fondly now but at the time it was quite alarming!
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