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How do you break habit of 11 month old waking for milk he doesn't need?

(12 Posts)
twosofar Fri 01-Aug-08 20:20:11

DS2 is nearly 11 months and wakes up at least once a night. The only way i can resettle him is with milk (not BFing any more) but obviously I know I'm making rod for own back. During day he naps well (30-45mins in the morning 1h 30 - 2h at lunch) and is very happy and contented but at bedtime he will only take a couple of ounces of milk - it's not that he falls asleep, he just bats it away - so i have to rouse him later to finish it, then he will wake up any time between midnight and 3.30am... sits up in bed & wails and only milk can stop it. Part of the problem is i don't want the shouting to wake my 2 year old. I wanted them to be sharing a room by now so I could get my spare room back, but have had to move DS2 back into the spare room as it's just making me edgy that something is about to erupt. It seems crazy that this is still going on and I am deranged from sleep deprivation. DS1 slept through at 12 weeks so I feel like a failure on top of everything else He's a tubby, placid baby, I really don't think he needs the feed, it's clearly habit. I have tried water but he just went ballistic. Any thoughts?

lazaroulovesleggings Fri 01-Aug-08 20:25:32

I would just carry on with the milk. Does he go straight back to sleep when you give him the bottle?
Ds2 is 2 and he still has a bottle in the night occasionally.

twosofar Fri 01-Aug-08 20:47:36

Yes he goes straight back to sleep but is it selfish of me to want a night of unbroken sleep? I am knackered and have to work. I just want him to get through the night. I'm so tired.

FrazzledFairyFay Fri 01-Aug-08 20:49:50

You could try offering a bottle of water instead?

twosofar Fri 01-Aug-08 20:51:45

Yes he goes straight back to sleep but is it selfish of me to want a night of unbroken sleep? I am knackered and have to work. I just want him to get through the night. I'm so tired.

twosofar Fri 01-Aug-08 20:53:11

He went mad when i tried water. Drives me crazy that during the day he couldn't give a rat's ass about milk, but at 3am can down a full bottle

Romy7 Fri 01-Aug-08 20:53:49

we went cold turkey. ds woke every two hours at 10 months, so it had to stop and fast. cry, up, cuddle, down. (dh did it as ds would only bf, went ballistic if offered anything in plastic lol) cracked it in 2 nights as he realised v swiftly if nothing was on offer, it wasn't worth waking up. bit noisy whilst worked it out though. slept through since. he's now 6 and i love him and i sleep. lots. and so does dh. smile he was a fat little sod and just being a pig - he needed no nourishment at night at all, and i wanted sleep. he was a much nicer baby once he learnt how to sleep without demanding milk, too.

Romy7 Fri 01-Aug-08 20:54:51

and i was a much nicer mummy, honest.

girliefriend Fri 01-Aug-08 21:00:53

I would be strict! If you genuinely believe he is not hungry or ill and just waking out of habit then IMO you would have to do a bit of controlled crying by which I mean, when he wakes go in and reassure, tell him it is bedtime, then leave him 10 mins. If he is still crying go back in and repeat and keep repeating until he finally gives up and goes to sleep. This will be hell for up to 3 nights and after which he will (in theory!) stop waking as there is nothing to gain. I did this with myy dd at 7 months (when i went back to work) and it worked really quickly, my friend did not do this with her dd who still wakes up for mlk and is now 3.5 yrs! If you psych yourself up for it and do it when you can cope with the tiredness, crying a bit more ie over a weekend or on annual leave then that might be eaiser.
It is more difficult when there are other kids to consider but I honestly believe in the long run it will pay off! Good luck! XxX

lazaroulovesleggings Fri 01-Aug-08 21:02:57

Thing is though, the 2year old might wake up and then it's goodnight vienna.

Although my two can now sleep through when the other one starts wailing.

twosofar Fri 01-Aug-08 21:40:12

Thanks everyone. I feel so dumb as I did the whole CC thing to get DS1 off the dummy at 13 months. I thought I knew it all when i had DS2 - just goes to show you how different they can be. I know the answer is to break the cycle but the noise in the dead of night in a London terrace is toonmuch to bear!

I'll let you know how i get on tomorrow x

PS did i mention the little bugger slept through all week when we were on holiday in July. First night back home, normal service was resumed

Guadalupe Fri 01-Aug-08 21:45:16

all babies are different though, just because ds1 slept through doesn't mean ds2 doesn't need comfort or a drink in the night. Lots of babies still do at this age. It is hard waking up though, especially if you have to get up and work and are worried about the neighbours. Hope you find the solution that works for you.

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