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How does he do that?!!

(19 Posts)
Flossam Sat 08-Jan-05 19:43:45

I am still on a bit of a mission to get DS to sleep in his moses basket. He is two months today, and has never spent a night in it. I manage to get him in it, either by putting him in asleep or by rocking him in it a bit to get him to sleep, but every time he is awake within twenty minutes half an hour. He has been known to sleep for 6 hrs when cuddled up with me in bed... I think the room temperature is about right, I have tried him with a grow bag, he dosen't have wind... As soon as I pick him up he can usually go straight back to sleep in my arms. What is causing him to wake up so consistantly?

KateandtheGirls Sat 08-Jan-05 19:44:45

My second one was exactly the same way, and I'm afraid I never found a solution. (Sorry - not what you wanted to hear.)

Lonelymum Sat 08-Jan-05 19:48:49

Not sure how much you cuddle him to sleep, but I did this all the time with my first baby - BIG MISTAKE! I think babies wake up quite a bit and the ones that appear to sleep through are actually the ones that are used to going to sleep by themselves. If your baby is always cuddled to sleep in the first place, he will cry when he wakes up and finds himself alone. I don't want you to do anything you are not comfortable with, but have you tried putting him down in the moses basket awake and seeing if he will go to sleep by himself?

marthamoo Sat 08-Jan-05 19:50:13

My eldest was like that, flossam - he was always a terrible sleeper and I never really cracked it. The only place he really slept for any length of time, when he was a baby, was on me (I used to lie on my back in bed and he lay on his tummy on top of me - it was far from ideal but I was close to breaking point). We co-slept til he was 8 months, then he went in his own room - there was a single bed in there as well as a cot and I would end up in the single bed with him at some point in the night, every night.

He was three before he slept through the night....sorry. I know it's not what you want to hear but I wanted to know you are not alone - I firmly believe that some children are just bad sleepers, no matter what you do. You just need to do whatever makes it a bit easier for you to get through.

Flossam Sat 08-Jan-05 19:53:17

Lonelmum, he is in there now, I have been rocking him and he seems (please) to have drifted off (now dare i take my hand away?). I have tried at times to put himin but he screams the place down!

Flossam Sat 08-Jan-05 19:53:44

soory for typos, one handed typing!!

Lonelymum Sat 08-Jan-05 19:54:21

In case three years seems too long to wait, I should tell you that my ds1 started to sleep the night when I had ds2 (18 months later). I don't know why! I just made an effort to let my other babies be more self sufficient when it came to going to sleep and none of them were as bad at sleeping through as ds1. Come to think of it though, ds1 is showing signs of being a bit of an insomniac like his father, so maybe it was just that he was never going to be a good sleeper and not something I did wrong.

Lonelymum Sat 08-Jan-05 19:55:32

So he has just gone to sleep with you just rocking the basket? Well that is a step in the right direction. Hope he sleeps for a nice long time now.

KateandtheGirls Sat 08-Jan-05 19:58:09

It was probably about 8 months when mine started sleeping by herself in her own cot. (I know - probably seems like a lifetime to you.) But she has been a great sleeper ever since - just wanted to let you know you're not doomed to having a bad sleeper.

Twiglett Sat 08-Jan-05 20:03:17

do you hate having him in bed with you?

or do you quite like it?

personally I think being in the parents' bed is a great way to raise a secure, self-confident child .. and they do grow out of it themselves

I used to do a bit of both and its lov-er-ley

Flossam Sat 08-Jan-05 20:10:00

No i don't hate having him in bed with me at all, it is nice. I do worry about him getting too hot /smothered, all that and also people do seem shocked when I tell them he is in with us, people seem to think he is being spoilt. I will have to go back to work and worry about it really. I am just a very, very good worrier!

And lonely mum, he woke up about the same time as that last post.

Twiglett Sat 08-Jan-05 20:28:47

You Cannot spoil a baby that young

Just let him sleep on top of the duvet in a gro-bag or with a blanket over him

You won't smother him ..

Do not drink or take drugs before sleeping with a baby in your bed though

There's a book called 'Three in a Bed' which is excellent and well worth reading

Really really really co-sleeping is good for you and the baby and it will not NOT NOT spoil the babby

Twiglett Sat 08-Jan-05 20:30:11

three in a bed here

Flossam Sat 08-Jan-05 20:30:51

Thank you Twigglet. I have a rather lovely SIL (Not) who stated that. It shouldn't stick in my mind but it has. She came over for xmas, sat on her arse for two days, and only stopped sulking to tell me who to look after DS (she has no children of her own) grrr. Can you tell I am bitter

marthamoo Sat 08-Jan-05 20:39:57

My Mum was horrified when I told her I was co-sleeping with ds1. You have to do what makes life easier for you. I was "tougher" with ds2 - I did controlled crying at 8 months as there was no way I could go through the sleepless night I had had with ds1 again - but even at an early age ds2 was a better sleeper than ds1. I did co-sleep with ds2 when he was little, but not every night as I had with ds1.

Best of luck, flossam, I know how hard it is.

Twiglett Sat 08-Jan-05 21:26:24

As an aside I hate this whole 'spoil the baby' malarkey

they're babies .. they're there to be loved and held and comforted and made to feel secure

And your mother's instinct says to cuddle him, so cuddle him

And how will you spoil him by loving him? Don't get that .. really don't ... you will make him secure that's all .. there is plenty time later to break him of any habits you dislike (takes up to a week or 3 at the most)

TracyK Sat 08-Jan-05 21:48:56

my ds hated the moses basket but started sleepng 13 hours straight when he was put in his big cot in his own room. Only lasted 3 months mind you - now he sometimes sleeps through, sometimes wakes once, sometimes wakes 3 times. I just go with the flow now (after stressing myself at the beginning) - I try not to bring him into bed with me till after 4am though. (unless I'm on my own like last night - when he came through at midnight! hee hee - don't tell dh

Flossam Sat 08-Jan-05 21:53:13

I know what you mean tracey, I was trying to stay up and keep him in there last night, without much success. But, my the bed was mighty cold without DP in there! DS is a very useful little heater, as I found out during my pregnancy!

Gwenick Sat 08-Jan-05 21:59:22

We ended up co-sleeping with DS1 for 6 months. He was exactly the same as your little one - and I always went to bed early in those days as he woulnd't fall asleep without me. Although it wasn't 'planned' that he'd co-sleep with us we did enjoy it, but by the time he was approaching 6 months we were finding it too hard - he was waking every hour for a 1hr feed and after trying everything else in the book (and some ideas not in the book LOL) we ended up doing CC at 6 months - straight into his own room and his cot (we didn't have a moses basket so it was the cot we'd been 'trying').

Had a friend of mine with the same problem - but her DD grew out of it at about 8 months.

Obviously CC is the last resort (or is for most people) and there are other methods that work just as well - and as long as you're happy with the situation I really wouldn't worry about it,

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