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How to go about changing my 6 month-old's night time behaviour?

(20 Posts)
lulupop Wed 10-Nov-04 18:22:55

OK, DD has now reached a level of night time wakefulness that we can no longer bear, and it's time to take the bull by the horns.

She has never ever slept through of her own accord. At the mo she goes to bed fine at 7pm and sleeps then till some time around 11pm-1am when she wakes and has a 7oz bottle. I know she shouldn't need this at this stage, but she always drains it so we've kept giving it as she *must* be hungry.

After that she sleeps maybe an hour before waking again and is then completely awake, and wants to play. Last night she woke at 3.30am and screamed till 5.30am (I went in every 15 mins, but nothing calmed her), then slept and woke for the day at 6.30am.

She has 2 naps during the day around 45 mins each. She is on 3x solids and 3x7oz bottles during the day.

I think we have to cut the night bottle out, but should I just totally withdraw it, or slowly reduce the amount? She goes mad if i try and give her water instead of the bottle.

Someone tell me this will get better!

kbaby Sun 14-Nov-04 22:04:24

cant offer any advice but I am watching this thread with interest.
We have exactly the same problem with 24 week dd. Goes to bed at 8ish then wakes at 11-1 for a feed. Will then wake again and is wide awake. No amount of rocking, feeding or leaving her gets her to sleep. I end up spending 2 hrs listening to her moan while I go in and out of her room putting her lullaby light on. I then normally give up around 4ish and bring her in bed. DPs not happy about this and is talking of doing CC. Were also on 3 meals and 5 feeds. I did read in GF sleeping book, before doing CC to dilute the night feed until it was mainly water. If they settle on that then you know its not hunger that is waking them rather habit.

Cha Mon 15-Nov-04 16:42:46

I can only tell you ladies what I did with my ds at 6 months... He too was a nightmare, not only did he wake up 2 or 3 times a night but also WOULD NOT GO BACK TO SLEEP. This is real hell. The very day he turned 6 months I did cc (I had already read Ferber's book from cover to cover and was waiting impatiently for ds to be old enough to start).
It took 3 nights and then he slept through. The first night the longest he cried for was 25 minutes, the second night ten minutes and the third was not even two mins. He has slept through ever since (apart from when he has coughs & colds) and is a great sleeper (although there are the 6 o'clock starts...).
I know not every parent likes the idea of CC and there are other methods that you can find, but it worked a dream for me. I also felt not one shred of guilt about what I was doing, as I was an exhausted, scratchy eyed evil witch mummy, dragging myself through the days and not being particularly nice to anyone, especially my two darling children. I figured that if I was to be a good mother, I needed to sleep properly, and this was the quickest most efficient way to get there. If you do it properly, it works. Well, it did for me!

abinad Fri 04-Feb-05 22:21:32

Help pleesassse, I have a 6month old dd who is not settling for me. I put her at 8.30 at night, and as she wont take the dummy i give her a bottle of water which is meant to have the effect of her rejecting it.Unfortunatly she now drinks the water and wakes up 5times a night to look for something to suck on. Shes not hungry as shes well fed during the day. any tips on getting her down for the night, do i stop giving her the bottle to suck on in her cot ( when she falls off i take the bottle from her) please help needed for a nights sleep

Horras Mon 07-Feb-05 16:57:29

Oh dear - sounds like we are all in the same boat. I have a 6 month old who was waking at least twice a night. After doing some reading I realised that I had created a sleep association as she would only fall asleep nursing. Hence, when she woke in the middle of the night that is the only way she knew how to go back to sleep. Read a great book "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley and she suggests not allowing the baby to fall asleep on the boob rather to remove them when the frantic feeding has slowed down.If they yell, give them a little more, but keep withdrawing and only give them mile if they are adamant about it! Have tried this and she now only wakes once a night, but I still have to get rid of that one!!! Any clues???? Know how you are all feeling!

whalebrae242 Mon 07-Feb-05 20:57:46

I had this situation with my ds (7 months then, 9 months now) before Xmas. He was going down well at 7pm but waking once or twice a night and for various reasons (mainly he would go back to sleep quickly and dp was working mad hours) I gave him a bottle. BUT he started to eat less during the day and wasn't hungry at breakfast time so I knew he didn't need the milk. Also, we knew we were creating a long term problem with wrong sleep associations so we took the bull by the horns soon after Xmas, farmed dd (4yrs) off to Grandma and did cc. First night was truly awful. He cried from 3am to 4.50am, not solidly but rising to crescendos. I was in tears and wouldn't have been able to continue if not for brilliant support from dp. We didn't go in at all as going in just made him worse. But next night he slept through until 6am, following night he cried for 20 mins, and has slept through since except when ill (which is entirely different situation). My advice is DO IT! You'll have a couple of bad nights but you will be so glad you did it! Also, go cold turkey at same time with any props ( bottles, dummy etc) and make sure you and dp are in agreement. Good advice also is to get up yourself and make a cup of tea or read a book. Good luck!

TracyK Mon 07-Feb-05 21:02:12

just make sure they're not teething - the one and only time i tried cc - baby tooth appeared a couple of days later - bad mummy!
try a tiny bit of calpol first and see if it helps.

highlander Mon 07-Feb-05 23:27:53

is it me, or does anyone else feel that CC is absolutely barbaric for kids that can't talk?

TracyK Tue 08-Feb-05 08:50:01

I used to think it - and still do for little babies - but once they reach a certain stage - you just know they're taking the piss (or is it just mine) but i (think) I can tell now when he's really crying and when he really needs to go to sleep and I need to be tough with him. But even when it's his pathetic little attention seeking cry - I still think that if he wants attention then he can have it.
I just dread the day if hs ever turns out like the children on Little Angels!

highlander Tue 08-Feb-05 14:23:36

never seen Little Angels, but the kids I saw last night on Supernanny had my jaw hanging open. 4 year old twin girls who were running absolute circles around the parents.

TracyK Wed 09-Feb-05 15:03:29

little angels - along the same idea as supernanny. they make my ds look like a little angel and makes my life look like a holiday camp - please don't let it change?????

otto Wed 09-Feb-05 15:34:01

I'm a cc fan too. We did a version of it with ds when he was 7 months. Lulupop, you could try getting rid of the 11pm bottle before trying anything. I reduced the formula by one scoop every three nights. Ds stopped feeding by the time we were down to 2 scoops in 6oz of water.

abinad Thu 10-Feb-05 23:45:23

can those who have tried the cc tell me this, did your little ones stop waking altogether in the night, i tried the cc and dont think i succeed very well. The firdt night let dd cry it out for 40mins, the second night dd seemed to go off by herself at 7.30 after about 10mins. So i thought i had it succeeded but dd still wakes throughout the night for a few minutes but stops the minute i soothe her, shes going down now at 7.30 by herself and seems to be fine till after10 then she wakes every so often so i resorted to giving her the dummie( she takes it now , probably a bad move but i prefer her sucking on dummie than bottle at night).Now if dummie falls out of her mouth she wakes up screaming till i put it back into her mouth, this continues throughout night. Should I leave her to cry it out ande settle herslf or what. Advice needed please

crazy Fri 11-Feb-05 08:52:14

when you decide to cut out nightfeed, don't do it by reducing powder/water ratio. just do it very gradually one night 7floz 2nights later 6floz, 2nights later 5 floz, etc , sounds quite drawn out but is a full proof way, and will work ( I'm a Maternity Nurse)

corry4 Fri 11-Feb-05 15:53:04

am desperate to try cc as my 6 mth old son does exactly the same as you lot have described ,hes on 3 meals a day
and has plenty of milk but drinks 2 bottles through the night. but not in 1 go ,a few ounces at a time then a
few hrs later a bit more and so on ,e is putting on weight too fast as a result. i have 3 other children and am worried that cc will wake them
thats why i havent done it!

hermykne Fri 11-Feb-05 19:25:45

lulupop my ds is 6mths + 2 now, and i am breastfeeding, but his wakenings were ridiculous considering he could go 4/5 hrs in the day without milk. he's on 3 meals a day so i decided to get tough.
now if he wakes be4 11pm i try to settle and/or leave him to cry . he goes to bed at 7pm. then he'll wake again and i 'll feed him and then until 3am its nothing, previously i did succumb. so he can cry away and i'll go in every so often.
last night i gave him ebm 3oz and he settled straight back to sleep til 6.45am.

so its the exact same thing tonight and ihope it works.

jabberwocky Fri 11-Feb-05 19:40:52

We went through something very similar with ds. At 6 months I was completley exhausted had terrible PN PTSD and thought of suicide often. (hate to be so melodramatic but it's the truth). Anyway, I heard about Elizabeth Pantley's book No Cry Sleep Solution and decided to give it a go. Probably the most helpful piece of advice for me was to get the napping under control. DS was not sleeping nearly long enough during the day and therefore was too wound up to sleep well at night. We worked on that and got his wakenings down to (only!) 2 times per night.
I had almost despaired of any more improvement. Finally realized that part of it was ds enjoying private night time with dh, who had taken over most of the awakening as I got so awake doing it I often didn't ever get back to sleep and this was making my depression worse. I steeled myself to a godawful week of bad sleep and took over the night routine. When he woke, if it had been a reasonable enough amount of time since his last bottle I would give him one. If not, I just rubbed his back and said "Shh", etc. I tried not to say very much at all though, just to be a comforting presence. Then I would leave. If he cried, I waited 10 minutes before going back in to repeat same thing. It only took a few nights to get him down to only waking once. I am still envious of people whose babies sleep all the way through, but this is sooo much better I am happy with how it is going. The other thing with ds is that he is a bit of a nightowl. I finally decided that that is just his biological clock. At 9:15 he goes into his bed for a little quiet playtime and I tell him "15 minutes until lights out". At 9:30 I tell him goodnight, turn on his sleepy music and turn out the lights. By 10:00 he is down. He wakes once about 3:00 am then not until about 8:am.

Sorry this is so long, but I hope it is helpful to someone.

charleepeters Sat 12-Feb-05 20:18:31

Hi mums i have been reading this thread with great intreast becaue i am on the verge of complete madness! ds is 21 weeks and has never slep through and people keep telling me hes late doing it and he should of been doing it ages ago Huh???????? hes only just 5 months for god sake!!!!!!!!
Anyway this is how it stands ds goes to bed at 6pm after a bottle i make sure hes wide awake when i put him down so he not associating sleep with feeding. now untill a week ago he used to go from 6-3 then have a bottle then sleep from 3.30-7 which was great! then mummy had the good idea if we wake him at 10 for a feed surely he should not wake agian untill morning because he wont be hungry at 3 logic! but oh no what ever i do he still wakes at 3 how can i get him out of it im not even sure hes hungry he doesnt cry that much at 3 but if i use cc he goes back to sleep and then wakes hour later and then cries from 4 untill 6! so im knackered ad feel like death warmed up. oh yeah and he screams 90% of the day any ideas ladys?

hermykne Sat 12-Feb-05 20:50:01

charlepeters, i hope you are ignoring what others say about sleeping thru the night, no one tells the truth in that regard and as a firend of mine said to my sil last week, "tey make liars out of you", they being the babies.

anyway i still feed my 6mth old in the night 3oz, and i know he is getting enough in the day too as well as solids, some need it some dont. i assume you are only giving him a small feed and have you tried water? you know the cc does work, i had to do it this week with my ds and he woke an hour later, did it again and last night was great.

crying all day - not sure about that? maybe the others have an idea

charleepeters Sat 12-Feb-05 20:55:35

thanks for the help hes having his normal amount of bottle at 3 but iw ill try reducing it tonight to see if that helps and try cc again if i have to i have just ordered that book you lot keep talking abotu anbout sleeping without the tears elizabeth pantly see if it helps! ta]

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