How to get baby to nap on his own

[Frustration21]

DS is nearly 12 weeks. Still not sleeping through the night (or anywhere near despite being FF)

During the day, he is so needy when napping. Will not just fall asleep where he is, ie in his chair or on his mat. He starts fussing and crying so i then pick him up where he will fall asleep. (Please dont suggest i leave him to cry. It wont work and he get so worked up).
So today, everytime he has fallen asleep, i wait 10 mins, then put him in his sleep nest, he either wakes immediately, or after 10-15 minutes. I have persevered and we have been doing this for the last hour. He eventually went to sleep in his chair (on vibrate and has only been asleep for 5 mins so it can change.

How can i break this cycle? I want him to be napping in his own room soon to get him used to it for when i transition him into there at night time

Just to add, at night, he is pretty good at being put down at night and getting off to sleep.

Thanks

[Frustration21]

And he is awake! 🤨

[FATEdestiny]

Introduce a dummy, if you haven't already. The single best tool for getting baby sleeping independently without any crying.

It is important baby goes to sleep where he stays asleep. So if he falls asleep in your arms, he will sleep better if he stays there. If you want him sleeping independantly (bouncer, pram, crib, cot) he needs to go to sleep in there. Putting down an already asleep baby will never work in the long run, as you are finding.

He's probably over tired aswel, this makes falling to sleep harder. Generally speaking the time awake between naps wants to be double the previous nap length. So if baby naps for 30 minutes, he should be asleep 1 hour after waking. If it takes you 15 mins to get him to sleep, that means starting the process of settling to sleep after 45 mins awake. Many new parents wildly overestimate how much baby should be awake for.

As for naps independantly - this is labour intensive and requires a lot of help to get baby to go to sleep not in your arms. The dummy is the number 1 tool, it allows for comfort sucking. Movement comes next - naps in something that moves are easiest to achieve - bouncer or pram. I wouldnt use the vibrate setting (take the batteries out), but bounce it rhythmically with your foot - this swaying motion is what baby needs. Or push the pram back and forth on the spot. It's going to take work., so keep going non stop.

If you want the nap in something stationary, patting baby to sleep will help. Teamed with the dummy for comfort sucking. Again, labour intensive on your part. You have to work hard to get baby to sleep independently. But they sleep better for it.

[Frustration21]

Thanks for the advice. 😀

He already has a dummy but he isnt reliant on it. He can take it or leave it.
I just want to be in a position, in the next few weeks where i take him upstairs awake for a nap, and he falls asleep by himself.

I thought by me being persistent in putting him down once he is asleep, he would get the message and eventually realise that where he sleeps.

That said, when i posted, i went straight back to sleep and is still sleeping.

I just dont want him to be sleeping on me for 1-2hrs in the morning/afternoon... i have stuff to do! 😊🤣

[RaginaFalangi]

No advice tbh but my 4 month old was exactly the same so I've put him in the pram for naps but hoping to transition him into the cot in the next week or so. He will only do 45 minutes which is better than napping on me for hours.

[peonyrose87]

He is only 12 weeks old and is so very little, napping on you is absolutely normal. If you're putting him down after 10 minutes he's not in a deep enough sleep yet and will wake up. Like others have said, at this age where they fall asleep tends to be where they will stay asleep. Pop him in a sling, go for walks, or go in the car if you don't want him napping on you.

[JemimaTiggywinkle]

My DS (9 weeks) is the same with napping, wakes up as soon as I put him down.

I’ve started putting him in the pram awake when he looks sleepy (in the house) and moving it until he falls asleep and then leaving him in it to nap.

He doesn’t sleep for as long compared to when he’s on me though.

Also, yes to a dummy. I only give it to him if he’s crying or once he starts getting really sleepy. Definitely helps him fall asleep quicker.