9 week old baby sleep

[jamjar84]

How did you put your baby down to sleep at this age? Ds would only fall asleep in arms rocking and shushing, I’ve now curbed the rocking and this past week he’s actually managed to sleep in the Moses basket when I’ve put him down without holding him 20mins beforehand! Managed to sleep up to 45mins tops, then he needs to be picked up and sometimes needs to nap more so hold him.

Also, do I need to wake him up at the same time to get up in the morning every day? Most days, (still sporadic) his morning up to early noon runs like clockwork feed/play/nap time wise. Then early evening it’s unpredictable, he can nap 10-30 mins a couple so times. Some nights are particularly tough with witching hours. Bedtime at 8.30pm but he tends to either be awake or tired but fighting to go to sleep up til 10-11pm for the feed. Bit of a worry that he can be awake for 3 hours during this stint (though not 100% awake, odd catnap in between).

This week has been different though, he had his vaccinations a couple of days ago and since then his sleeping has been all over the place.

Just thinking he’s 2 months old, I know he’s still little but am now thinking do I need to start thinking about bringing more structure into his day for sleeps and nap time? Any advice??

[Lpc123]

I also have a 9 week old and this sounds quite similar. She can rarely go down without being rocked/shh-Ed/white noise in a dark room. I find she gets way too overstimulated otherwise and can’t get to sleep! We’re trying to do a nap or two a day by putting down drowsy in cot but it’s really hit or miss. On the morning wake ups we are trying to be up at 7/730 to try and establish some sort of routine. But again sometimes it’s 630! A bit unpredictable. Evenings also sound similar where we aim for bed at 830 starting with routine of bath, quiet time/massage, feed all in a darker room.

During the day I try to really stick to awake windows. It seems it’s 90 mins max at this age so around then I actively try and get her to nap.

No real advice but wanted to write that we are very similar!!

[jamjar84]

Thanks for your post, it’s good to know someone else out there is in a similar situation. Yes 90 min max awake time too, just the evenings can be unpredictable. I’m unsure whether he’s sleeping too much in the day or he’s still trying getting to grips with day/night as it takes a while for him to settle for bed and his awake time in the morning varies. Heard typical time babies wake in the morning is between 6 - 7am.

[Jennyb42]

Have an 8 week old she doesn't go to sleep until at least 2am, naps all day with her "awake time" being from about 9pm until 1am/2am, any suggestions on how to get her bedtime earlier?

[cheeseandwine2019]

I'm in the same boat with my 10 week old. She does sleep (by some magic) pretty much 7pm-7am with two wake ups for milk. (I should say that my first daughter was the opposite of this and literally woke up 5/6 times a night for months on end, so I appreciate how fab this is). At night she's quite happy to drink her milk (breastfed) and zonk back out.

However, I am also seriously struggling with every nap (we wear her in the sling now for almost every nap) and bedtime itself as I honestly don't know how to settle her and do a routine etc for bed! I can't seem to nail drowsy but awake, rocking just makes her more irate, and leaving her in her cot she just screams. We do white noise etc but just can't figure out what I'm doing wrong.

I know some people may disapprove at this age but I've actually hired a sleep consultant (£140 for a video appt, a personalised plan and a month unlimited support via email, I thought this was reasonable) to help me start to put her down awake and getting her to sleep in the day in her cot (or even her pram or car seat, she honestly won't sleep anywhere but me). We start Monday so I can let you know how I get on and tips etc? I'm just at my wits end with a 22 month old and wearing my lovely girl in a sling 4/5 hours a day. It just isn't sustainable for us as a family any more! Quite honestly, I think this sleep consultant will be the hand hold I need to show me what to do!

[Jennyb42]

Oh dear not good, yeah let me know how you get on xx

[JBOH2020]

@Jennyb42

Have an 8 week old she doesn't go to sleep until at least 2am, naps all day with her "awake time" being from about 9pm until 1am/2am, any suggestions on how to get her bedtime earlier?

I'm the same with my 9 week old. Doesn't go to sleep until 12/1 am but then doesn't wake properly for the day until 11 am ish( does wake for feeds in this time) It's so hard because when he's asleep he's hard to wake up properly to try and get into some routine earlier in the day. So desperate to try and get some of my evenings back

[Newmama29]

@cheeseandwine2019 this is very similar to what my 4 month old was like. Fortunately, he has grown out of it & although he still falls asleep on me, it’s became easier & easier to put him down to sleep in his crib once he’s fell asleep. I was honestly at my wits end (I’d posted a few times on here looking for advice re nap times) & was just desperate for some time alone during the day when he napped but he would only ever nap on me! I just had to persevere & at around 3 1/2 months we started to get better.

In terms of trying to get baby down earlier at night, I read somewhere that bedtime routine should start 45 mins before you want baby to sleep & the best way to do it is to stick to a rigorous routine. We try to play as much as we can between the last nap of the day & bedtime to burn a lot of energy. We then run a bath for about 630/45, after bath we go into the bedroom with low lighting & do some baby massage & read a story & then I often fed to sleep. I have done this routine religiously since he was around 4 weeks old & we always manage to sleep within the 45 mins of starting bed time.

I hope this helps some of you but try to remember that they are still little babies & if they want a cuddle it’s best to give them it. It doesn’t help how you all feel the now (trust me I wanted to murder people when they told me to just go with what baby wants) but they grow so fast

[Bluebell798]

Your baby is still super young and your experience is normal- pretty much mirrored mine around this age. I would have a rough routine with naps but not get too concerned about it, and definitely not be waking them up in the morning but that's just me. Other than bedtime being consistent around a half hour window , would follow cues for naps and leave strict routines until around 5 months. That being said, he should start to produce melatonin soon and develop more of a circadian rhythm so you should hopefully have less trouble at night! Have a bedtime routine and stick to it; it took me about 2 weeks to establish bedtime. You may have to take a while and keep resettling.

[Jennyb42]

I just really struggle to stay awake until 1am! I tried being upstairs in a quiet room but she was awake for hours then woke every 45 mins in her cot throughout the night so last night my partner kept her downstairs until midnight then brought her up, she had a feed then actually slept from 1am until 5am couldn't believe it but me on the other hand was awake constantly checking her! I put one of my tops beside her and tucked her arms right in (she likes her arms out) and she barely moved maybe a coincidence I dont know but I will take it!

[Sunflowergirl1]

My first struggled to sleep....I had the month from hell and I wondered what an earth we had done. The midwife who was of the more old fashioned brigade gave some good advice but one was to get a routine in place and as long as they don't need changing or winding etc then don't rush to pick them up from the cot as soon as they start crying on a night...although comfort them.

I went for a rigid routine (I'm awaiting the wrath of hell now from the MN crowd). Got him up and fed at same time, sleeps, lunch etc and feeds all at set intervals including waking him for a feed at 10pm. It was a pain in the arse but within a week he was sleeping beautifully and the only feed we didn't wake him for but let him wake us was the middle of the night.

I can't tell you the relief we felt to get some rest...The only problem was that I didn't dare relax the routine for fear of going back to sleepless nights but I did gradually become more flexible once he was 12 weeks and sleeping through from just gone 10pm to 7

He is now a lot older and has slept brilliantly from after that month!

[jamjar84]

I’m wondering when I put him down for a nap I’m cuddling, shushing and rocking him how I can progress to him when being put down to sleep how he can sleep longer and how he can fall asleep when he’s being put down drowsy but awake?

I get that he’s likely to sleep longer if put down drowsy/awake than already asleep but think he’s still too little, mind you sometimes I I’ve managed to get some success doing this way but only with the morning nap, otherwise it’s a cry fest. Do I keep trying or he’ll just do it when he’s ready?

Also, I’m doing the feed/play/sleep cycle in the day but if he wakes up after a short nap he can get pretty grumpy not hungry or tired, It’s sort of hanging around til he’s due for his feed, what do I do? Kinda messes the cycle as he’s awake before the feed and don’t want to associate feed = sleep.

[Newmama29]

@jamjar84 I think you just have to persevere when they’re so young. I tried to do some sleep training at that age but he was just too little! At 4 months he’s still not fab at going for a nap himself. I cuddle him to sleep then put him down, if he wakes up within 30 mins I pick him up & cuddle him again until he falls asleep & then put him down again. I’ve found this works for us & I then tend to get an hour out of him after that & we've got into a little routine doing that. All babies are so different though

[AliasGrape]

I feel like a terrible mum reading these posts sometimes - we've never put her down drowsy but awake and she's 6 months nearly! She naps on me or in moving pram, feeds to sleep at night and then sleeps through pretty much give or take the odd dodgy night.

I just don't really feel the need to change it and keep assuming she'll do whatever the next step is when she's ready for it. Which she always has so far.

I've been reading the gentle sleep book by Sarah Ockwell Smith which is really good and has helped me to be more relaxed about the whole thing.

Baby group friends (online at the mo) seem to have been a bit more structured than me and they all talk about 'Care It Out' on Instagram so that might be worth a look for ideas?