12 week old stirring every night from 5am - cannot settle!

[LadyH1986]

Hello!

My DD is now 12 weeks and for the past few weeks, has been stirring every morning at 5am (sometimes as early as 1am)... but we cannot seem to help settle her!!

She’s still asleep (or half asleep) and kicks her legs, loud sucking noises and only stops when we put her dummy in.

However - this will usually last for 15 minutes before we have to do the whole thing again. So we’re literally putting her dummy in every 15 minutes until we finally give in and wake her up at 7!

I’ve tried even getting her out for a quick cuddle to try almost wake her then put her back down.... have tried feeding her.... it seems to still happen regardless of what we do, once she’s back in the crib. Sometimes we have to lie with a firm hand on her chest to settle her and that sometimes works but not easy to do for a couple of hours...

Has anyone else experienced similar and can offer any advice??

Thanks! Xx

[Pipandmum]

My first child slept well but was generally up for the day around 5-5.30. He's17 now and still an early riser (in non lockdown times he's always up by 7.30 regardless if he's going to college or work or day off).
I'd say if after 5am that is not unusual, however painful it is! Earlier just keep on trying to get him to resettle (forget the dummy though its just a crutch). A few more weeks and things may change.

[aquicknamechange2019]

Is she actually waking up? She does t sound like she's distressed so have you tried leaving her to resettle herself as opposed to intervening?

[Sandrine1982]

Hi OP. We were in a similar situation around that age. I think around that time our DD started refusing her 2nd nap at nursery so I told them to do only one nap - which was around 12:30 there. It was really hard because DD would often wake up super early, like 5:45, and by the time she got to nursery she was knackered and had to last till 12:30. It was heartbreaking but I didn't see any other solution. We tried sticking to 2 naps at home but she started refusing the second one at home too. And logistically it was also getting very difficult to squeeze the 2 naps in because DD always does 2 cycles of sleep, ie 1h20min at least. So 2 naps was just a bit too much nap time. Now at almost 17 months I think we're finally in a happier place. DD still wakes up relatively early, but if she wakes up before 6am I try to leave her for a few minutes (like 15-20 min) before I intervene. She's become quite good at resettling, and in the last two weeks she's been doing 10h30min stretches at night alone without me and the boob!! I'm sure it will happen for you too- they just need a period if adjustment. I would say that for us, 14-15 months was that period. It also coincided with teething!! Could yours be teething too? That can be a reason for an early wake up in the morning and for naps...

Good luck x

[Sandrine1982]

Oups sorry this was supposed to go in another thread

[LadyH1986]

No she certainly isn’t distressed which is good!

We’ve absolutely tried not intervening... which would always be my preference... but if we don’t pop dummy in or hand on chest at v least... it escalates from stirring to whimpering then crying!

[jamjar84]

My HV says that’s normal behaviour. First third of the night they are more likely to sleep more soundly but then the last third (or even second!) they are more in a lighter state of sleep, so it’s not uncommon that they make noises, kick, flay their arms about. Unfortunately there’s nothing you can do, just takes time and for them to grow as they develop more deeper sleep than REM.

[BabyYodaYada]

Get a cherry dummy. They are bigger so easier to keep in their mouths.

Have you looked into swaddling? I used to wrap my DS arms rather than a full swaddle and that helped them settle.

[LadyH1986]

Thanks both!

Yes we’ve been swaddling up until recently. I thought about 4 months you were meant to stop? We decided to move to a sleeping bag as she was desperately trying to get her hands to her mouth in the night

The kicking and bits I can handle and almost sleep through now.... it’s the ‘only settling with a dummy’ but that’s proving hard work in the early hours. Will look into the other dummy brand - thank you xx