Please help me with my 15 week old’s sleep!

[Ellax]

My son has always ‘fought sleep’, he had really bad silent reflux when he was younger so until we got the diagnosis and got on top of it he was so unsettled that I was doing everything I could just to calm him/make him feel more comfortable I.e. having him in my arms all day (even then he would cry).

He’s now 15 weeks and i breastfeed him to sleep every night and it’s exhausting because he can go on for an hour and a half (sometimes 2 hours) until he eventually falls asleep. I feed him in bed lying on my side and I can see that he wants to fall asleep and he’ll nod off for a minute and then frantically start looking for boob again and then feeds again until he finally falls asleep.

I’m just so exhausted and it does not seem to be getting any easier...

As for day time naps, he’ll often have ‘cat naps’ asleep on my boob after a feed but I can’t move or he’ll wake. sometimes he’ll fall asleep in the sling if I’m vigorously moving around.

I now can get him to sleep in the pram if I go on a proper walk so I now get him to do a 1hr / 1.5hr nap in the morning by doing that every morning.

I spent 200 quid on a ‘4moms mamaroo’ but he will not sleep in it. I’ve tried having him In there with a dummy whilst I’m close by, no dummy with me close by, dummy and my hand on him, putting him on the boob when he starts really crying and then returning him to the mamaroo... please please what am I doing wrong. How can I make this better??

Also, now at night he’s waking so much more I just don’t know what to do

[Ellax]

Oh i forgot to mention i purchased the mamaroo for daytime naps seeing as he seems to be addicted to movement and it’s so cold outside and I’m so exhausted I just do not have it in me to be outside with him in the pram every 2 hours during the day

[Keha]

I don't have much advice to improve things, sorry. I think when my DD was that age I just used to go to bed with her at about 9pm, feed her lying down and fall asleep. I listened to a lot of audio books, but basically I just lay there. Once she was fully asleep, I might sneak off to the loo or to get a drink, but only for a few minutes (we were on a mattress on the floor in case she rolled). She would not nap in her cot and only really did 30-40 min naps. In a way I felt like I was quite rested because I just sat or lay with her a lot - but I also felt very trapped by it. By about 6 months she changed and we could put her in a cot for at least a couple of hours. She's nearly 10 months and she often does 4 hours in her cot and then comes into bed with me.

[Jobseeker19]

Hi, in the nursery I work at we take babies from 4 months.
After lunch we get them to sleep in a bouncer or by laying beside them and patting them, stroking their nose or their forehead.

[bumpertobumper]

It's hard
You'll get through it
Some babies don't sleep as we hope - reset your expectations (it is easier than 'resetting' the baby). Accept you can't control the situation.
I've been there.
They are all big now ( well, youngest is 5) and those many sleepless nights and days are a distant hazy memory.

[bumpertobumper]

I also spent lots of money on things I hoped would help, you are not alone

[bumpertobumper]

Happy Christmas!

[TOJ123]

Omg this literally could have been written by me 6 months ago. My daughter is now 10 months and the first 5/6 months of her life I spent two hours breastfeeding her to sleep every night and nap time her sleeping on me and only sleeping in the pram (if not on me( and I also did the exact same thing and bought the mamaroo which didn’t help!! I wanted to post this to say it does get better. I really really thought I would be breast feeding her to sleep for two hours a night until she was 2 but it stopped at 5 and a bit months I think! Weaning and starting her on solids really really helped with this I think. She also goes down awake now to sleep (there’s a battle most nights to do this but she always goes down awake now) and honestly that just came with time and her getting used to surroundings etc. I honestly was so desperate and so down when my baby was around 16 weeks and never thought I would be where we are only 5 months later. The one thing I’ve learnt is they will do things when they are ready to, if you can, try and go with the flow although easier said than done :( xx

[TOJ123]

Also, in the end with naps, the day I accepted she wouldn’t sleep in her cot for naps was the day that everything got better. I just used to take her out in the pram everyday and stuck to a strict routine and I absolutely loved it!! I got fresh air and exercise, met friends for walks, got to go shopping etc.

[Clockstop]

Try the pantley pull off method. That could work for a quicker exit at bedtime.

[Clockstop]

Do you have a sling or carrier? My first would only ever sleep in that for naps, even at 18 months.

[Ellax]

Thanks for your comments - it’s reassuring that I’m not the only one! @TOJ123 I see what you mean about accepting that he won’t go down for naps but being outside with him in the pram when there’s a lockdown and it’s freezing cold is becoming quite draining 🙁 especially as this is pretty much the only way he’ll nap! There’s only so many times I can circle the common 😂 I think if the situation was different and the weather was nicer etc I would have no problem just being out with him for most of the day !

@Clockstop i didn’t realise there was actually a name for that but yep I’m tried that loads of times and I find that he wakes up within 5 mins and then it takes a good half an hour to try and get him to sleep again ! Yep I have a sling, the sling is great if I’m outside the him... he like to be fed and walked in it at the same time, I’m not joking when I say I think I’m getting back renaître arthritis in my wrists! But in the house he hates being in the sling 🙁 seems like I just need to ride it out I guess. X

[TOJ123]

@Ellax completely understand. My 10month old still naps in her pram and I just do it in the house instead when it’s cold like today. I just keep pushing back and forth and then when she’s in a deep sleep I stop. I do get it though that this isn’t a great solution