Night waking

[Danielle2206]

LO (little one) is 17 months and has never slept through the night! We've kept her in a bedtime routine, her room is a good temperature and she has a decent nap before lunch.
Not sure what we're doing wrong 🙈 shes recently been going to sleep fine but waking halfway through the night for a couple of hours, then cries as soon as I leave the room. I know shes being clingy.
Last night it was 12:45 until 3.30, it's so difficult as we're both working full time too.
Has anyone tried any methods that have actually worked? I wont leave her to cry it out but I'm open to pretty much anything else.
TIA (thanks in advance) feeling pretty hopeless at the minute 😫

[OnlyFoolsnMothers]

Is she breastfed? How longs her nap? Any chance it’s teething?

[MrsCremuel]

Same here with 18mo! No answers I'm afraid but watching thread with interest.

[Danielle2206]

Hi no she's not breastfed, just a bottle of milk before bed. She naps usually around 1-1.5 hours. She is teething at the minute so I know she is struggling with that, but she has never slept well. She also stops crying as soon as we go in.

[Danielle2206]

MrsCremuel sleep deprivation is definitely the worst! Especially when it seems everyone you speak to has a baby who slept through since 6 months 😬

[OnlyFoolsnMothers]

If teething then I would try an Ashton & Pasons teething sachet on waking with a bottle of milk and lay her back to sleep.
If not teething then I would keep going in and laying her down, don’t talk apart from perhaps “sssh” but she will need to learn that whilst you are always there you won’t stay in the room.

[Danielle2206]

OnlyFoolsnMothers thank you, I have been mostly doing these things. I guess I need to be a bit more patient.

[3inthefuckingmorning]

Following.. me too

[Danielle2206]

3inthefuckingmorning feeling a bit better knowing I'm not alone (I know that doesn't help) 🙈

[MrsCremuel]

I know right?! And then once he got to a year everyone was like, 'and his sleep just be better now'....well better than waking every hour yes but still not great! It's awful, sleep makes me a much better mum and all round human. What time does your DS go to bed and wake up?

[MrsCremuel]

Sorry, DD!

[Danielle2206]

She goes to bed at around 6-6.30 which I know is early but she usually can't keep her eyes open after that. We're up at 5am because i start work early. So when she's waking early hours in the morning it's a killer getting up at 5!

[3inthefuckingmorning]

@Danielle2206 my DS goes to bed at the same time. He is too tired to keep up any longer. He usually wakes between 2-4 and the only thing I can do is get him into bed and breast feed him and hope that he goes back to sleep. but it takes forever and sometimes he is just awake after that. If he does go back to sleep he is guaranteed to be awake at 5.

I'm sure my DD was sleeping through at this age, I had a great strict routine with her and even now at 4 she sleeps from 6-6 no problem.

Hope you finds solution and please share if you do!

[Changedmynameagain1]

Op no advice but we are in the same boat, DD 15 has never ever slept through the night either. She goes to bed at the same time as she’s beyond exhausted after nursery full time.

We both work full time also.

She’s my 2nd and my first slept amazingly compared.

No words, but it does get better eventually- I live with this hope. We also take it in turns. One night I get up the next dh gets up with her.

[Changedmynameagain1]

15 months 🤣🤣

[LiG123]

Don't go in the room. If you know baby is fine it'll just be a habit, it took us 4
Pretty painful nights to get there but DC goes down at 7 and I won't go in until 6am. I have a video monitor so I know all is ok.

[DelurkingAJ]

Hang in there. Nothing useful just solidarity as neither of mine slept through before they started school (DS2 still appears in our be most nights...he’s in Reception). It’s awful but it does end eventually (long, hard look at DS1).

[LiG123]

I also read up on getting a longer night sleep (later than 5am) and it said a later nap everywhere I looked inc a sleep therapist.

Usual routine

6:30/7 wake
8oz milk out of bed
8/8:30 breakfast
11/11:30 lunch
Nap 11:30- 2/2:30
Snack when wakes
5pm dinner
6pm tv off
Bath
6:30pm 8oz milk
Book in the living room
Teeth brushed
Nappy
7pm bed

Hope it helps

[girlmummy25]

My DD is 18 months and sleeps through the night apart from a couple of times a week when she does exactly this! Last night she was awake for 2.5 hours & im starting to struggle with it!
I think im going to try what @LiG123 suggested - how long did your little on cry for until they fell back to sleep please?

[LiG123]

@girlmummy25 at first about 30 mins or so. It took a lot to not go in and I sat crying watching the camera. BUT even by day 3 it was 10 mins or so and then he just didn't wake.

It was almost like a habit in his routine.
We never have give milk in bed so he doesn't associate milk with his bed time and wake wanting that either.

We don't hang around at bed time either. That's why book reading is in the living room. It's kiss, love you, in the cot. Night and we walk out. Sometimes it take 30 mins to fall sleep but he does just self settle and lay and chill. Rarely cries 🤞🏼 for you!

[CherryPavlova]

Don’t interact when they wake. Don’t reward wakefulness or assume they need something. It’s habit being reinforced by adult attention. Make waking as boring as possible and teach them to self settle. You might think it’s harsh but teaching and enforcing good sleep is hugely important to both physical and mental health.

If you must go in, don’t put lights on, don’t feed or give drink, simply say it’s sleep time and leave. Let them cry themselves back to sleep.

[littleharissa]

Let them cry themselves back to sleep.

Oh this makes me so sad

[LiG123]

@littleharissa I think as a parent you know what different cries mean.

If my child was in pain or in need of something I'd be there in a flash. If it's just a habit that needs breaking I think for their mental well-being and development of being absolutely shattered it is worth it for a few nights.

[3inthefuckingmorning]

@LiG123 I absolutely agree with you

[LiG123]

@3inthefuckingmorning love the name 🤣

[3inthefuckingmorning]

@LiG123 😄