Baby #2, very much wanted but his sleeping habits are ruining my life. He's 10 months old. Never slept well other than a short-lived 3weeks phase around 3 months old where he would sleep in his cot and wake only once for a feed around 3-4am then back to sleep (so I know he's capable).
I have slept in the spare room with him since day 1 (so that DH can actually get rest in our room as no point us both being exhausted and he has the monitor for our two year old on case she needs him). Was my intention to be back in my own room by 6months but I'm still stuck with him now and becoming really resentful. I don't want to sleep away from my husband this length of time, its not healthy for a relationship. Husband doesn't complain to be clear, this is not what I want, it's making me very unhappy. I've had enough. 10 months is enough time away from my husband and my bed. And baby needs to start to fall into line somehow with sleeping in a room without me. He doesn't sleep well with me in the room anyway so he's a rubbish sleeper either way, why keep making myself miserable being apart from my other half every night.
Baby is a nightmare sleeper. I never get more than maybe 2 hours unbroken sleep but that's on good nights. Most of the time he's up more often than that. He's just super clingy and wants to be with me all the time. I do not want to co sleep with him. I did that on and off when he was small between trying to get him back into his cot because literally wouldn't settle any other way but it's always scared me for the safety element so I've never been able to relax or sleep properly when he's with me in the bed and now he's far too rolly and it's not safe for him to be on the bed at all, accident waiting to happen. He has to be on the cot for his own safety.
I've tried everything with him. Nothing works. Literally nothing. I'm at the point now where I just want to leave him in the room alone and let him work things out for himself even if that takes him hours. I don't want to sleep with him and I don't want to go to him. If I had a bedroom I could put him in at the other end of the house where he couldn't disturb us all with his whining and crying I probably with the mindframe I'm in right now would do it. I cannot physically continue to go on the way we are. I need to be back in my marital bed and be less exhausted so I can actually be a good parent to my eldest who is suffering everyday with a mum too tired to take her out or play properly and who has no patience or energy.
This morning after being up with him from 3am-6am with him refusing to sleep or go back in cot for that full 3 hour stretch I had had enough. When my daughter got up at 6 I took him into her room, put him in her crib and closed the door on him. He screamed and screamed for about 25minutes and I just left him. My husband was busy sorting out the dogs and the morning jobs then he did go get him.
I just don't know what to do or really what the point of this post is other than venting. I love my son but I despise him at night. I NEED him to be in a room on his own. I give him every little bit of me all day every day. I want some small part of my life back with being able to sleep with my husband at night but trying to leave him in a room alone he just screams the house down keeping us all awake anyway. I feel so hopeless.
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Baby ruining my life
81 replies
02tootired · 25/10/2020 07:25
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