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will baby’s sleep get better without sleep training?

4 replies

morningsunrise · 20/10/2020 10:05

Really need some words of wisdom or reassurance from you wise mummas who had babies that just couldn’t sleep. I’m in sleep deprivation hell and at absolute breaking point.

DD is 6.5 months old and the past 2 months have been horrendous. Up until 4 months she was sleeping for 6-8 hour stretches then we hit the dreaded sleep regression and it all went to pot. We now spend up to 3 hours settling her at bedtime - she wakes crying every 15-30 minutes. Then she’s awake every 1-2 hours (sometimes more) for the rest of the night.

She’s reliant on being fed to sleep- I know, I know, rod for my own back and all that but I can’t find any other way to settle her! Everything else winds up in hysterics and full meltdown which breaks my heart to see.

We’ve tried all the usual advice - proper nap schedule, white noise, comforter, bedtime routine etc but to no avail. I’ve tried earlier bedtime, later bedtime, more day sleep, less day sleep but it makes no difference.

Has anyone experienced similar with their little ones? Am I doing something wrong? Did they just grow out of it? Has anyone had success without sleep training? (No judgement at all to anyone who sleep trains, it’s just not for us). Is there hope for us or am I resigned to another 2 years of night torture? It’s one thing being on mat leave but I’ll never be able to cope with this little sleep once I’m back at work.

It would be lovely to hear from others whose baby’s grew out of this naturally, or who have any other tips which don’t involve variations on CC.

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Bewilderbeastie · 20/10/2020 18:22

Try The No Cry Sleep Solution if you want a very gentle method. Mine is same age, we did train her to go to sleep by herself at around 4m (basically because everything we had been doing until then suddenly stopped working so she forced our hand really). It wasn't too traumatic and she's a much happier baby now because she has that skill. From what I've read, if your baby can't fall asleep without help they won't naturally learn to do so until you help them.

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Dillybear · 20/10/2020 19:06

I can’t answer your question as I only have one baby. But I taught her how to sleep gradually over a few weeks using a kind of gradual retreat approach. It did involve some crying, but she was never left to cry and be upset. Having said that, now she’s a little older if she has a whinge or a shout before she falls asleep for a few minutes I’m fine with that. She now falls asleep happily the majority of the time, though still wakes overnight.

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Tickly · 21/10/2020 22:59

@Bewilderbeastie what roughly does that book suggest? I am sure I used to have it as it rings a bell but I got rid of my books when we thought we had had our last child.... Now need help with ds3 who is a 4 month nightmare sleeper.

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terryandthechocolateorange · 28/10/2020 13:36

My DD was an atrocious sleeper up until around 19 months. Fed to sleep but was regularly up 4/5 times a night, sometimes for hours on end. Didn't sleep through until then when suddenly, she just started doing it. It started with a few weeks of her sleeping from 7pm all the way through to around 4am when I'd quickly and quietly rush in a see if boob would help her drift back off (which worked 50% of the time). After a while she was just able to get through the last hour and a half or so without waking, all by herself.

She just turned 2 and sleeps through 4/7 days at the moment and is pretty easy to resettle unless she's poorly or super overtired. I still feed to sleep too, btw! I hear you RE the rod for your own back, but I've reconciled by just imagining the battle if I didn't have that magic power! plus I know it won't last forever. If it's not broken, don't fix it!

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