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When did you stop co sleeping?

40 replies

zaffa · 07/09/2020 14:27

DD is nine months and has been officially co sleeping for about a month (as in we got back from a trip and didn't even bother to put up the travel cot in our bedroom for her to sleep in, crib was taken down and her cot bed in the nursery is used to pop her into while we get dressed in the morning). She's always preferred to sleep on me though, so actually this is blissful progress as I get lots of sleep and she happily sleeps next to me.

But when does it end? How do I naturally transition her out of it? I'm not planning on doing so yet as she clearly needs to be this close to me for some reason, she doesn't like to sleep alone or in her pram so much and likes to hold onto me while she sleeps too, I don't want to cause her distress by forcing the issue so I'm more curious about how others ended co sleeping - did your baby just gradually show signs of being able to sleep in other places or did you have a battle to get them out of your bed?

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Harrysmummy246 · 07/09/2020 17:11

Ummm, we slept in the bed in DS room and he's now 3.2 years and I'm in my own bed more than his a lot of nights or just from early am if I don't want a toddler early wake up!

Maybe not the answer you wanted but honestly, more sleep for everyone and path of least resistance

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zaffa · 07/09/2020 19:31

I don't mind the co sleeping actually - sleep is very important to me and this way we are all sleeping so it's a win win. I'm just wondering if when the time comes she will give me a signal she wants her own bed ....
I can't sleep in her room though as it's tiny! My other issue is how to secure her in the bed - I don't want to go to bed at seven every night (although some nights it's welcome Grin) but it's like when she was little again as I can't leave her alone in case she rolls out of bed. Also she's currently going through a real SA phase and holds me by the top so I can't leave anyway but that's just recently and I know it will pass once she's settled again (currently doing settling in days in childcare and with grandma, and DH has just returned to work after five months at home so I think there's a lot of change in her little life). I'd ideally like to put her to bed and then go downstairs and maybe watch a tv programs or clean the kitchen!
How do you ensure your DS doesn't roll out of bed?

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Indoctro · 07/09/2020 19:49

Tried and failed at 11 months old and finally got him out permanently at 5 years old

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zaffa · 07/09/2020 19:56

@Indoctro what did you do in the evenings to stop him rolling out of your bed?

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alwaysstressed · 07/09/2020 19:57

My dd is 4 and still co sleeps with me. DH sleeps in her little single. Fine by me I love her wee snuggles 🥰

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Allington · 07/09/2020 19:58

By school age DD was in her own bed during the week, fairly naturally by wanting to be a 'big girl' but still getting to snuggle up at weekends. But once she was asleep I could leave her in bed without worrying about her falling out.

How about a pillow either side of her to secure her? Or just make sure she's in the middle rather then the edge - how much does she roll about? Or make sure there are mats either side of the bed if you don't have carpet, unless the bed is unusually high?

She is now 13 and still tries it on most nights Grin

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loveskaka · 07/09/2020 20:02

Didn't start

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mamma2016 · 07/09/2020 20:13

We co slept from 15 months to 3 years. She had started to thrash and get frustrated with me at night and it seemed she needed more space. I wish I'd never bothered battling with a cot and sleepless nights for the first 15 months! I used to put her to bed then have a nice evening with DH, then get back in with her at my bed time. It was lovely and we all slept!!

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zaffa · 07/09/2020 20:26

@Allington

By school age DD was in her own bed during the week, fairly naturally by wanting to be a 'big girl' but still getting to snuggle up at weekends. But once she was asleep I could leave her in bed without worrying about her falling out.

How about a pillow either side of her to secure her? Or just make sure she's in the middle rather then the edge - how much does she roll about? Or make sure there are mats either side of the bed if you don't have carpet, unless the bed is unusually high?

She is now 13 and still tries it on most nights Grin

She rolls a bit once she starts to get restless but mostly she snuggles into me - so she rolls over and buries her head into me. I'm worried if I'm not there she will keep on rolling to find me!

I probably need to wait a little bit until the anxiety settles down, I tried to put my top onto a pillow the other day and then sat next to the bed to observe and she noticed pretty quickly and stirred quite a bit so I think she's feeling a little insecure and just needs me there. But a couple of weeks ago I could easily get up and walk away and out the room and she didn't notice.

I'm thinking pillows either side and then maybe a few more on the floor? We have an extra thick mattress - I am a little PFB about her so I'd completely freak out if she rolled out the bed and hit her head. To me she's very delicate 😍 (although she is a proper sturdy little girl!)

To be honest I was too much of a worrier to do it under six months, but She slept a lot better in her Moses basket and I kept her in it for far too long really. I wish I'd never started the crib battle - it just made both of us miserable and suffering sleepless nights. I was constantly exhausted and so was she - this is much better for all of us (even DH is well on board but I think that's because she sleeps mostly on my side and the poor cat - who slept on his head - get locked out now as one of them can't be trusted not to sleep on her head, so he gets all the room!)

We may have to reconsider when she gets a lot bigger but we do have a Kingsize so that helps.
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Indoctro · 07/09/2020 20:31

We used a bed guard thing you attach to side of the bed.

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BiBabbles · 07/09/2020 20:40

Around 9 months with DD2 (she became a kicker), the others were between 12-15 months which is around the same age DD2 moved from our room in with her siblings in her own bed.

To transition, we had either a mattress or one of those soft chairs that can fold flat next to their bed so when we put them to bed, we'd sit in there til they went to sleep and during the night, if they got up, we could put them back and on harder nights we could sit or just crash in there for a while. It took a few months, but they eventually got into the routine and slept great.

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Strokethefurrywall · 07/09/2020 20:48

Co-slept until 8 months with DS2, slept in his own crib fine, now sneaks back into bed with me 5/7 nights of the week and he's 6 1/2!! 🤣

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NationalBust · 07/09/2020 20:51

18m. She's gone straight into her cotbed with the side off. Resettles in her room 1-2 times a night and then she toddles in to wake us around 6.30. I'm a bit stumped as to how easy it was, had expected more of a battle.

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zaffa · 07/09/2020 20:53

@Indoctro

We used a bed guard thing you attach to side of the bed.

I thought about that but sadly the design of our bed wouldn't be compatible for one. Our mattress sits inside the frame and there isn't enough room for a bed guard.
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heyhoo · 07/09/2020 20:55

I have a nine month old that co sleeps, I have bed guard on her side of the bed (we are getting a king size delivered tomorrow so her dad can join us again) and if I want to put her down before I go up I put a pillow the other side not to near her but have a camera on her so if she moves I can see. I've only been putting her down the last week and she hasn't moved enough to make me go up and move her yet. She used to hold me to sleep but seems to have stopped the past week or so allowing me to put her down before me! Good luck!

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OverTheRainbow88 · 07/09/2020 20:58

We uses bed guard. My DS starts in his own bed and always ends up in mine, he’s 19 months old.
We have mid night fights over my pillow!

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zaffa · 07/09/2020 21:04

@heyhoo

I have a nine month old that co sleeps, I have bed guard on her side of the bed (we are getting a king size delivered tomorrow so her dad can join us again) and if I want to put her down before I go up I put a pillow the other side not to near her but have a camera on her so if she moves I can see. I've only been putting her down the last week and she hasn't moved enough to make me go up and move her yet. She used to hold me to sleep but seems to have stopped the past week or so allowing me to put her down before me! Good luck!

I thought about a camera! I may just go down that route and get a real handle on how much movement there a actually is. Currently there has been no movement and she isn't even holding me! (Although I do have my hand on her tummy mostly)
I
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zaffa · 07/09/2020 21:05

Hahahaha she has such a sixth sense! She must have known I'd just typed that and to prove a point stirred and grizzled until I found her dummy and popped it back in her open mouth 😂

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Took · 07/09/2020 21:07

12.

Thats years, not months. 😬
He's still not in his bed! Cant imagine it'll last much longer though.

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Shouldbedoing · 07/09/2020 21:07

Just before his 10th Birthday Blush

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Shouldbedoing · 07/09/2020 21:08

You best ne Took

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Shouldbedoing · 07/09/2020 21:08

You beat me, Took

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Took · 07/09/2020 21:09

I'm so relieved you posted about an older child too, Should! Grin

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NoRoomInBed · 07/09/2020 21:15

You can buy a memory foam cot bumber it goes under your sheets I use it for my 3 year old and hes not fallen since.

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NoRoomInBed · 07/09/2020 21:16

Sorry didn't mean cot bumper ment memory foam bed bumber thing. Thay didn't really help either did it? Sorry

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