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Please help me, im at the end of my thether!!

(24 Posts)
bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:01:51

my son is 5 1/2 months old, he has a strict bedtime routine and is in bed by 7pm every night.

He maybe teething and is a bit snuffly.

He wakes up at 10pm every night and then every hour on the hour.

I have tried everything from ashtons/parsons, medised, calpol, nurofen, lavender oil, olbas oil, dreamfeed (hasnt had a night feed since he was 2months old) and it hasnt made the slightest bit of difference.

He woke a 5 this morning which i finally gave in and got up with him, ut only drunk 3oz of bottle, he has 3 solid meals a day and around 20oz milk so he's being fed well.

I am getting around 2 hours sleep a night and its killing me, i try to sleep when he sleeps during the day but he only sleeps for 20mins at a time.

For example: i got up at 5am with him this morning, 3oz milk, asleep at 6am til 6.30am has had another 3oz and is now asleep again and its not even 9am, he will also have a another sleep b4 lunch and 2 sleeps in the afternoon.

He is very grouchy and generally not a happy baby in the day.

I really need both of us to get some sleep.

Please any advice will be grateful

MegBusset Fri 28-Sep-07 09:05:02

I have a rubbish sleeper too, so loads of sympathy. Can you co-sleep at all? Even if it's only for a few nights so you can catch up on some of the sleep deficit.

bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:07:17

i didnt want to start doing that in case it back fires on me same with dreamfeed.

Carmenere Fri 28-Sep-07 09:10:33

Bubsy, perhaps the 'strict' approach is just not working with your little baby. Lots of babies don't actually respond well to routine and what exactly is the point of putting you both under the strain of a routine if both of you are exhausted and stressed out. How about allowing him to feed when he wants, sleep when he wants and co sleeping for a few days to see how it goes?
If it is much worse than now you can go back to your routine.

MegBusset Fri 28-Sep-07 09:11:00

Hmm, I thought that too when I started co-sleeping, but figured my DS' sleep could hardly get any worse!

Do you think there could be an underlying reason why he's waking, like reflux?

Also, can he roll yet? If so you might find he sleeps better on his side.

Doodledootoo Fri 28-Sep-07 09:13:35

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bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:14:06

yes he can roll but wont stay on his side, the doctor has given me gaviscon for reflux

bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:16:25

doodle, do i take for walk b4 or after bath?

Doodledootoo Fri 28-Sep-07 09:17:15

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Doodledootoo Fri 28-Sep-07 09:18:14

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bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:18:25

yeah i do prop his matress up slightly

Lorayn Fri 28-Sep-07 09:19:08

Try to stop him sleeping so much during the day, if you notice him getting sleepy then play with him, sounds a bit cruel I know, but I had to do it with DD.

What does your bedtime routine consist of??
Some fresh air, then a bath and bed a bit later could help you.

I emphasize the fresh air bit (not in the garden by himself, but a quick walk, that isn't long enough to make him sleep, it is actually slightly better in this weather too) Then a nice warm bath, play in the bath first, keep him as awake as possible, before drying him in a dimmed room, so he gets ready for the sleep time. Try making his bedtime more like 8/8:30, just after his last bottle. (Making this up with the hungrier milk could help too, he may be eating lots during the day but it wont keep his belly full at night.)

It may not work, but after about a week or so of doing this with DD she settled back into a wonderful routine.
Remember, routine needs to fit in with the baby, not vice versa, and Good Luck!!

bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:19:55

i'll try the fresh air thing doodle, thank you.

would you advise to give medicine of some sort?

Lorayn Fri 28-Sep-07 09:20:04

Looks like I x posted, glad to see someone else thinks the same as me though!!!

Lorayn Fri 28-Sep-07 09:22:04

bubsy, I would say no medicine unless he is obviously ill. It could force sleep that isn't as deep as proper sleep, therefore make him wake once it has worn off iyswim.

bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:22:47

thanks lorayn, will try later bedtime too, was also thnking of hungrier milk, should i do this just for last feed or all day?

Lorayn Fri 28-Sep-07 09:27:52

If he is fine throughout the day, just start with the bedtime feed.
Then depending on how he goes increase it at your will.

From what you are saying he is fine in the daytime, just waking lots at night, sometimes it can be hard to get enough milk in them to keep them full, DD always used to fall asleep about half way through her bottle, but giving her hungrier milk meant that she could take less and still be just as full. If he falls asleep during his night feed do you wind him??

I know it can be really annoying to wind them and have them wake back up, but it could be that he needs a good burp!! DD once woke up in the night, I picked her up and she let put the most almighty roar!!!

Hope this works.

bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:32:21

he sometimes falls asleep through feed and is always winded b4 put to bed. i will try anything at the mo, thanks for your advice x

Doodledootoo Fri 28-Sep-07 09:33:33

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bubbsy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:35:36

thanks doodle, will try your ideas x

frumpygrumpy Fri 28-Sep-07 09:56:59

My gut reaction is that he could be topping up with lots of little sleeps which are knocking out his system. It could be that his body needs trained into a bigger night time sleep. Has he always been like this? My DD1 was very like this as a baby.

One thought would be to find a way to encourage a bigger sleep in the day (something like a short morning nap and a longer lunchtime/early afternoon sleep). It might be best to avoid sleep too early in the morning or too late in the day (say before 10am or after 3pm) as these sleeps can interrupt the night sleep, they can become part of the night time allotment of sleep. Does that make sense?

Try to find a way he will take a longer sleep - snuggled into you, driving round in the car, out walking in the pram etc. Keep him awake in the morning and let him have a short nap. Wake him and keep him awake until you're ready for the afternoon sleep. Then get into bed together or go for a big big drive, anything to ensure he stays asleep (I couldn't even stop the car once my dd1 was sleeping or she would instantly wake). Repeat every day, exactly the same method, and see if after a week or two you notice any change.

Don't worry that you are teaching him only to sleep in the car or with you. Once you have determined that he can sleep longer, you can train him into doing it in the place/style you would prefer.

I know lots of people don't like this book but it was my saviour. It has taught me loads about sleep and I still use it.

it saved me

Good luck and keep us posted. I felt desperate when my DD1 wouldn't sleep for any length of time.

bubbsy Sat 29-Sep-07 10:03:10

Well its been another cap night, he's been up every hour on the hour, he didnt go to bed till 7.30 and had hungry milk and it didnt seem to work, so any more ideas would be great

frumpygrumpy Sat 29-Sep-07 14:10:36

Sorry to hear you've had a bad night. Its soul destroying and so frustrating. Definitely buy the book. You will learn about all sorts of sleep stuff. It will help.

Lorayn Sat 29-Sep-07 21:45:04

Sorry to hear that bubsy, did you keep him awake as much as possible throughout the day???
Also, sorry to say this, but it could take a few days of a new routine before he starts to fit into it, I wake up every day at 7am no matter how much sleep I've had, if he is used to waking every hour he will continue to do so for a while.

I'm not sure what this book advocates that the other poster is talking about, might be a good idea to get it, but please, please if it suggests it dont start controlled crying just yet. Try EVERYTHING else first.

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