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SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK PART 5....... God have mercy!

1000 replies

Tamdin · 30/07/2007 09:46

Can't believe we're onto another new thread already!

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Tamdin · 30/07/2007 09:48

you've got to check out the thread 'i saw jesus....' it's sooooooooooooooo funny.Haven't laughed so much for ages. can't do links but maybe if amber around you can do it for me

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Tamdin · 30/07/2007 11:47

bumping incase you can't find us

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Tamdin · 30/07/2007 12:56

.

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bagsundereyes · 30/07/2007 13:14

Found you 1

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gingerninja · 30/07/2007 14:40

I saw that thread Tam, yes very funny. Well, where did that thread go? think we filled it up quicker than all the others put together.

I can't remember where we're up to so....
More babies? I did think about it a few months ago, thought there was no point enjoying the luxury of sleep before a new one arrived but I've got a new job now so that'll have to do for the time being

Welcome MamaHF, great name. How old is you lo? Not sure you mentioned? My DD is 11 months and I night weaned a couple of months ago now. We were co-sleeping (from when we went to bed, she's always gone to bed in her cot just never stayed there) Anyway, I decided that firstly I wouldn't feed her back to sleep between the hours of 11 and 5 and just cuddle her back to sleep (she has a dummy too) It was absolutely painless, she never cried. Had she been inconsolable I'd have fed her but we didn't have any problems. I quickly progressed to not feeding between when she went to bed and 5 because I realised I was giving her mixed messages. This was a little harder but it meant that I had to go to bed earlier in order to get her back to sleep. This has worked but then the co-sleeping became a bit of an issue for 2 main reasons. She was getting very wriggly and we were both waking such a lot because she'd wriggle right underneath me or down to the end of the bed and I'd have to move her back. Also, she was waking earlier and earlier in the evening and screaming the house down because she wanted to be in bed with me. So the next part of the plan has been to keep her in her cot. We started off with her sleeping on a matress on her floor and me joining her when she shouted, basically just to get her used to staying in her room. Then we progressed to the cot and had the matress by the side of it, holding hands through the bars. In the last few days we've begun to try and settle her and leave, if it doesn't we stay sleeping next to her. This was much harder than night weaning. There have been tears and nights I just wanted to take her back to my bed but if she was really upset we'd just get her up, cuddle and put her down when she was calmed. We've been doing this about 2 weeks now and things are definately improving. We've had some very long stretches of her sleeping without waking. Last night 8 hours which I think is the longest so far. Essentially what we're doing is gradual retreat. It really is quite a slow process but it's more gentle if you don't like crying. Also, she's actually settling much much better. She does like us to stay in the room but we don't need to hold hands when we put her to bed anymore, she'll just roll over sometimes turning to check that we're still there but eventually dropping off. I'm not worried about that though. Watching a baby drifting off into a peaceful sleep is beautiful. I never thought we'd get there because bedtimes have always been a bit fraught.

Well, I've made it sound perfect in gingerland haven't I? It's certainly not as bad as it has been. We had a 7.15 to 3pm stretch last night. At which point she wouldn't settle so I got her out and cuddled her. Her cot side slips underneath as it's a bedside cot so I put the side down and laid next to her with my arm in her cot. She went back off until 5 and I settled her again until 6.45. Not bad actually. Please may it continue to improve, you know how boasting is the kiss of death to success.

Think I've rambled for long enough

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gingerninja · 30/07/2007 14:58

I meant to say, if it wasn't for the support of my DH over the last two weeks I'd have given up by now. His consistency has really motivated me as I was always one for the easy option. It really helps to make a joint decision and to have realistic expectations and be able to hand over when things get tough knowing that your lo isn't going to get mixed messages. It's taken me a long time and lots of arguments to realise that though.

Hope that doesn't sound patronising. I also think it is timing and age. She's getting older and I'm due back at work. I wouldn't have been doing this 2 months ago. I also don't think this is the end of it but it just feels better knowing we have a plan. One we can all follow and each of us knows what to expect.

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MegBusset · 30/07/2007 15:59

Hello, have only just logged on 'cause we went into the West End this morning to visit mine & DH's workplaces for the first time with DS. He was ever so good and slept all the way there and back. Almost makes uo for last night, which was pretty horrendous: not too bad in the evening (three shushings) but after coming in with me at midnight woke at 2, 3-4.30 (ouch), 6 then 7 for the day. Must be the eczema because he was scratching and crying, wouldn't be settled by boob or dummy. Feel shattered but have had a nice day anyway, at least it's sunny!

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MrsThierryHenry · 30/07/2007 16:18

Bags ? yay for your fab night out and for finding something positive about sleepless babies. I?ve been invited to see KT Tunstall in October ? DH will be 11 months then but I?m so used to saying ?no? that I almost turned it down, fool that I am. Thankfully opened my mind before my mouth and realised I could prob manage a single night out in 3 months? time!!

MamaHotFoot (and you certainly are one of the loveliest mums I know), am so glad you?re finding the thread useful; here?s hoping both our lovely darlings learn to sleep before we go back to work. Keeping my fingers and everything else crossed for you, angel.

Mummymagic ? there was apparently an outbreak of measles at a school/ nursery down the road from me (Walthamstow). Made me think twice about MMR, since I?ll be leaving my DH with a childminder in the autumn ? it?s getting more and more likely he?ll encounter nasty bugs in London these days. Having said that I had both measles and mumps as a wee girl, but had a marvellous nurse mum to help me mend. Apparently my measles experience was horrific (I was four ? caught it a year before the jabs back in the 70?s), but it never affected me afterwards (except when darkness falls and the streets are lit only by the light of the mooooon mwa ha ha ha harrrr).

Tam ? I?m guessing your blocked boob duct was painful. I?m guessing extremely painful, right? So why on earth do you feel like a failure? You did the best for yourself and your LO ? how can that be a failure? Have some more Green & Blacks (on prescription from Dr Mrs TH).

Oh, and welcome to CB and congrats on your December bambino!

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MrsThierryHenry · 30/07/2007 16:22

Oh, and I think I can authentically use the 'developmental milestone' excuse now - DH hit 8 months yesterday (ooops!! I forgot to have some birthday cake on his behalf!! Better buy some emergency cake before the shops close) and has become super-doopah sensitive to all movement when he falls asleep in our arms -i.e. we can't flinch an inch or lay him in his bed without him waking up and begging us to hold him. Very similar to his behaviour 3 months ago, which ended with him sitting up independently. So I reckon he's preparing to crawl.

Am frantically baby-proofing things like sockets and sorting out the many, many, many things we have temporarily/ permanently stored on our floors. We might even end up with a tidy house.

Sleep issues are still hard but I remind myself every day to just let him be and keep enjoying all the time I spend with him.

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tibsy · 30/07/2007 16:24

found you!!!!!
bags, for your improved night my love

ginger for your continued success. really pleased for you

meg for your night but for your outing. i bet everyone adored lo at work?

welcome mamahf, i was trying the GR and was having great success until teething put pay to it and i havent started up again. i'm a lazy arse me was trying to cut down night feeds but dd teething again and boob soothes her during the night (and its easy for me )
.....hence, why we had such a crap night last night thatll learn me

i think ive got lazyarseitis atm, so just cant be bothered to start any routines again. am sure i'll start something when i get desperate, but until then, its feed/cuddle to sleep and hope for the best

hi to tam, and dont beat yourself up for not making the 1 yr mark bfing. you've given your gorgeous boy the very best start will check out the jesus thread

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tibsy · 30/07/2007 16:28

hi mrsth, x posted. wouldnt mind coming to see kttunstall with ya? ......
must admit, i'm been very lax when it comes to babyproofing. note to self: get on it!!!!

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bagsundereyes · 30/07/2007 16:29

Just wanted to add Tam, I think making it to 8 months BF is amazing. I didn't manage 6 weeks (how else do you think I managed to have a long night off ?).

Your DS is quite clearly the picture of good health, and you should be proud of that .

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MegBusset · 30/07/2007 16:49

What is this Jesus thread you speak of??

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Tamdin · 30/07/2007 17:10

thnaks all re bf.

meg have bumped jesus thread for you. better go supposed to be making ds his haddock fishcake...he'd better like it!

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Tamdin · 30/07/2007 17:11

meg it's in chat and starts 'one day i woke up and saw jesus...'
made me lol so much. we've got all this to come!

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Amberjee · 30/07/2007 18:48

i thought it was rather quiet today, then tried to post, and here we are - found you

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Amberjee · 30/07/2007 18:52

jesus thread

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Amberjee · 30/07/2007 18:59

i think i'm planning a night out next weeekend. wooo hooo. am so excited. actually, on saturday we were walking home AFTER 7pm with LO and it felt really naughty. yep, it was the first time in 7 months i'd been outside the house after 7pm.

oh dear, LO was asleep, but now awake ...

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Tamdin · 30/07/2007 19:45

amber for your night out. Ds was around 6 months before I had a night out to local pub (was home by 11) but have always taken him out to friend's houses and restaurants past his 'bed time'. might explain a few things

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Amberjee · 30/07/2007 19:52

yeah i feel pretty embarrased that i've not been out this far, even with LO. just been too tired!

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EffiePerine · 30/07/2007 19:53

Another thread

Looks like we'll be here for a while yet. Crap night last night, wouldn't settle at all for any length of time. Today I am blaming ... teeth . He's asleep now so hope tonight is an improvement.

Meg: sorry you had a bad one as well. The humidity is not good for us - DS can't sleep, I can't sleep, DH's eczema plays up...

Amber: a weekend away sounds great. I'm working out when we can leave DS overnight with Granny so we can get a little time to ourselves (computers will be banned )

Ginger: onwards and upwards!

Right, off to find the old thread to see what I've missed

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EffiePerine · 30/07/2007 20:01

Mummymagic: I'm in Stamford Hill so we have probably crossed paths in a bleary-eyed fashion . I think a London get-together is a very god idea - Amber's not far away either and we've been thinking about meeting up . I work Mon Tues Thurs Fri so Weds or weekends best for me.

MrsHF: welcome! I'm still bfing and now back at work - I express about once a day which is enough as DS doesn't drink much milk during the day (he's nearly 10 months - where has the time gone?). He makes up for it at night, though. He can get by on one or two night feeds (think he still needs at least one) but we're sharing a room and if he knows I'm there he wants milk! We're hoping to move towards the end of the year, so he'll be in his own room and that might make things easier...

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EffiePerine · 30/07/2007 20:01

ah, a night out not a weekend - am ahead of myself there

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Tamdin · 30/07/2007 20:01

amber wasn't being a smart arse about your night out so hope it didn't read that way, problem with not hearing tone of voice

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tibsy · 30/07/2007 20:08

amber, hope you have a fab night out my love. go for it!!!! it gets easier after the first few times. first time, i was a bit anxious. poor ds was left with the grandparents really early on, (i was only 19 at the time tho!) i didnt leave dd til 4 months and then we were back early
havent been as brave as tam yet to leave her overnight my main worry is that shes so unpredictable through the night

anyway, hope you're all having nice evenings. its been a lovely sunny day here
lets hope for some sunny nights sleep too!

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