CC experiences(19 Posts)
has anyone seriously fixed a bad sleeper, permanently, with controlled crying?
please tell me what your issue was, and how you fixed it. i'm at my wits end
My DS went to sleep for 2 hours and then woke every 45 minutes after that. Every night. For months. I was hallucinating with exhaustion. I did CC (10 mins/2mins) and although he cried hard the first 3 nights (less with each successive night) he slept for 12 hours straight once asleep. Night 4 started a pattern which lasted until teenage years....wave night night and big grin. Good luck.
Oh, except for trying again every few months....I just did CC again and it only lasted one night.
and I assume he's not mentally scarred because of it
We did it when our littlest was 12 months old, he had never settled himself to sleep nor slept through the night before that and we were so tired it was unreal. I appreciate it's not for everyone but we also have 9 year old DS who we never had any problems with sleep wise so it was a real shock. It was tough for the first few nights but completely worked for us. Definitely no bad effects on him, in fact he's much happier now he's getting a good nights sleep! Xx
rachelracket is yours the feeding to sleep and cosleeping 7 month thread?
hi FATE not sure i've definitely posted before about my crappy little sleeper but i've lost track!
i've made another post this evening. bedtime is top of my brain at the moment
We did it at 14 months. DD was either up every 45 mins OR she would only wake once but stay awake for anywhere up to four hours (and I had to hold her the whole time or she screamed - not DH, had to be me). I was on my knees, she cried all day because she was so tired, DH was struggling at work... it was horrendous.
CC honestly changed our lives - all three of us. I recommend it to everyone (it's not guaranteed to work but if it does...!). This is what we did:
DH did the first night and it took about 45 mins (going in every 1 min, 2 mins, etc). She slept through. I did the second night and it took a lot longer, but she mostly slept through (did the same when she woke in the night). Then he did the next and it was quicker. Then I did the fourth and it was even quicker. We got "stuck" at about 15 mins of whinging for a couple of weeks, but she was consistently sleeping through which was the main thing. Eventually she started singing/chatting herself to sleep, which she still does now at 3.5!
We had to redo it a couple of times (after illness, when she went through a weird regression at 18months) but it was never as bad, and it's the best thing we ever did. I felt like a different person and she went from an overtired mess to a a lovely, cheery little soul. She isn't scarred in any way, and probably doesn't even remember it.
Sorry this is so long! Best of luck
thanks @CoodleMoodle that's really positive
Rachel no, not vastly
It has given him good practice for his teenage years (he’s now an enormous 17 yr old who would sleep all day too given a chance!!) Frankly things were so bad that it was him crying for a bit for 3 evenings or his mother turn from a zombie to booze or mental health issues. Sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture for a reason.
I should add my DS is only 7 months (will be 8 on 22nd) so i won't be trying anything like this until the new year/feb
when daddy is home to suffer with me it's just hard to imagine it could be knocked on the head within a few nights. dare to dream
Mine was younger...just couldn’t wait any longer. Mind you, this was before the advice to wait a year, but I don’t think I could have waited even then.
Many sleep consultants advise 6 months upwards for CC but 1 year mark is better as they understand more. However, you can sleep train in other ways before 1 year - definitely don't have to just deal with it until Feb. If you do decide on any form of sleep training (including the gentler approaches), you should commit to it and see it through though otherwise you risk it getting tougher
Tried CC multiple times with my DS1 at multiple ages and even resorted to CIO for a full week. It didn't work at all, much less in three nights, and I'm convinced it's why he's frightened of the dark now at 5yo, and would infinitely prefer to sleep with somebody - he even begs his 3yo brother to stay in bed with him.
DS2 was an equally appalling sleeper but after my CC experiences with DS1, there was no way in hell I was going to try it again. I co-slept with him, moving to sleeping on his floor until he was 14-15mo, then did a very gradual withdrawal. He is by far the more independent and secure sleeper of the two.
CC is not a guaranteed fix. It may work for some people, but it's not a last ditch 'OK, this will definitely work' option. I regret CC and especially CIO, and I do think it's caused lasting issues. I do not regret co-sleeping, much as I disliked it at the time.
@ElphabaTheGreen thanks for your experience. this is exactly what worries me! i've known DS to scream for 2 hours + on car journeys (he also hates the car that's another thread) he just does. not. give up.
That's what DS1 was like. CIO he screamed for two hours and slept for 45 mins, then screamed for two hours then slept for 45 mins....on a loop, all night, every night for a week. I hate myself to this day. If anyone ever tries to suggest 'well, you just weren't consistent', the red mist descends. I was very consistent - abusively so, I would admit, because I was so desperate for sleep. I kept trying it because of stories on Mumsnet of it having worked in the magical three days, and maybe he's just not ready now but will be in a few months, and 'you just need to be consistent' and...and...and....
Sleep is a developmental skill. They will acquire it when they're ready and yes, probably respond to sleep training at a later age than others. But CC, no. I just don't think it's worth even trying from my experience. Maybe if you've got a 2-3 times a night waker, but if they're a 6+ times a night like both of mine were, that's just a baby who's not developmentally ready to sleep without close parental support.
Oh, DS2 hated the car, BTW. Disabling the airbag and putting him in the front next to me helped, while also holding a dummy in with one hand. Driving one-handed while suffering from extreme sleep deprivation...it's a miracle we're all still alive, really
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