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Downstairs neighbour

(11 Posts)
xoxoemzxoxo Mon 04-Dec-17 14:21:17

Hi ladies

I'm not a mum myself yet however have been having issues with my downstairs neighbours who have a baby around a year and a half old.

We live in a block of flats where the soundproofing is absolutely awful.

I recently moved into the flat and gave been redecorating. Every time I do some work that bangs or drills etc the lady from downstairs will come up and ask me to stop so her baby can nap.

I understand that her baby needs to nap but I also need to do my diy. She is always at home so it's not like I can do it when she isn't there.

The final straw was this weekend when I banged one nail in and there was a knock at my door asking me to stop for 2 hrs as it was the start of nap time.

Her baby wakes me up without fail every night at least 3 times from its screaming but I do not complain as I understand babies do cry in the night.

As mums already do you feel that she is being unreasonable as I am getting very frustrated and she is making me anxious that every time I make a noise I'm going to have a knock on my door?

Flicketyflack Mon 04-Dec-17 14:24:13

It sounds like she is being slightly unrealistic! The world does not stop making noise once you have a baby and the baby does have to get used to other noises as only sleeping when it is absolutely silent is not a great habit for her to get baby in to 😉

BrutusMcDogface Mon 04-Dec-17 14:24:39

If the child is one, chances are he/she has a map of a couple of hours after lunch. For the sake of keeping the peace, could you maybe just ask her when nap times are and then do your diy at other times? Eg, stay quiet between 1-3 and drill to your heart's content the other times?!

She is a bit cheeky if she's asking you to be quiet all day long.

xoxoemzxoxo Mon 04-Dec-17 14:26:35

It seems like whatever time of day it is she will be having a nap! This weekend was 11.30 another time was 4pm!!

lunar1 Mon 04-Dec-17 14:28:16

You are just going to have to tell her you have to get these jobs done. I think I'd put a note through telling her when you are likely to be doing your diy then ignore any knocks at the door.

TheEmmaDilemma Mon 04-Dec-17 14:33:23

If I was being reasonable I'd ask her to provide a couple of hour slots where it was best not to make noise.

And could she sush the child in the night? wink

Otherwise? People live close to each other and we all have things we need to do. And the baby won't benefit not sleeping though noise.

rabbitsdontlayeggs Mon 04-Dec-17 15:05:01

Ah, it is hard. I remember inwardly cursing my neighbour when he was doing DIY and my baby was trying to sleep. We're only semi detached too but it reverberated through the house and without fail woke the baby I'd desperately spent an hour getting to sleep!

However I wouldn't have dreamed of asking him to stop during the day. At nighttime as far as I'm concerned you need to try to be considerate and not make any sort of huge,
out of the ordinary family home noises - whether anyone has kids or not it's just considerate - but in the day it's kind of tough. All I did do (and we're on friendly terms so it wasn't an issue) was ask him to let me know if he was going to have a really noisy day which he did a few times. On those days I took DD to my DMs or ILs with the travel cot and spent the day there.

Sounds OTT but I got relaxed days with decent naps (essential for good nighttime sleep here!) and he got his DIY done. Sorted. We also return the favour now, for example when DH painted the fences with paint that we knew could drip through to the other side (it matches both sides) he went round to let neighbours know to keep their girls away from the fence to stop them getting paint on them.

You need to try to find a compromise that works for you both. She can't tell you not to do DIY in the day, that's just daft. The world doesn't stop because you have a baby. However, you are neighbours and you can help her out by letting her know or agreeing to a cut off point for noise etc.

Waterdropsdown Mon 04-Dec-17 15:09:19

My neighbour did a lift conversion a few months ago when I had 8-10 month old twins. It’s a bit rubbish but she needs to realise life goes on.

Look up the rules for your area about when you can make noise. Usually it’s similar to working hours. You might end up falling out with her but sounds likely she likes to pick a fight so if it isn’t this it will be something else.

crazycatgal Mon 04-Dec-17 15:15:58

She's bonkers if she thinks she can ask you to stop DIY work in the middle of the day. If you want to be amicable then go round and ask her for a 2 hour slot when she wants to put the child down for a nap. Tell her that you will stop work during those times but apart from that you will be doing DIY during the day.

xoxoemzxoxo Mon 04-Dec-17 15:18:24

Thanks all. I do think she is a bit of a busy body the day I moved in she tried to report my car for being parked in the car park. I think I will just pop a note through her door on days I'm going to be banging to let her know as don't really want to talk to her! I did look up the rules as it's shared ownership so we have a housing association and it states diy during hours of 8-6 is acceptable. I am considerate towards her for example I make sure that I hoover at reasonable times eg not after 7 pm as I guess that would roughly be babies bedtime. Although my hoover apparently scares the baby too she knocked and told me so! 😂

rabbitsdontlayeggs Mon 04-Dec-17 15:24:22

Oh for goodness sake. Most babies don't like hoovers etc. Tough they learn! My DD hated it when she was small, she's 20 months now and follows me around shouting 'hoooooooo!' and screeching with laughter. She has to wave bye bye to the 'hoo' every time I put it away! hmmHer baby will never learn to tolerate any noise if she makes it live in silence! God help her if she ever has a second child.

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