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5 1/2 month old won't go in cot

(15 Posts)
user1508013898 Thu 02-Nov-17 19:23:23

Hi really struggling to get my 5 1/2 month old to sleep in her next to me cot. She breast feeds to sleep which I am trying to stop but give in very easily. As soon as I put her in the cot she wakes and instantly cries then as soon as I pick her back up she seems to falll immediately back to sleep ( obviously in a very light sleep) after finally getting her in the cot the rest of the night when she wakes I co sleep and breast feed intermittently all night. I have a 3 year old who has regular night wakings and get in my bed and I really can't handle another 3 years of no sleep and co sleeping. Any advice? confused

FATEdestiny Thu 02-Nov-17 20:23:14

You don't want to seek to get her in the cot already asleep - that is never going to be sustainable. You want to aim to get going in the cot already awake and going to sleep in there.

That might be done the slow, gentle way by putting down very close to asleep and working slowly towards being slightly more awake as going in the cot.

Or you might go the route of straight to in-cot settling. So finding a way to get her to go to sleep without being fed and while in the cot. I find the dummy most useful for this. But you might want to shush pay or pick up put down.

user1508013898 Thu 02-Nov-17 20:57:36

Thanks for the reply. I have tried putting her down drowsy and putting her down awake but she just screams. I have spent 2 hours trying to get her in her cot tonight. I tried lying next to her as it is a next to me after all, however she screamed and screamed. The screaming stops instantly when I pick her up. She gets in such a state when I put her down. In the day she is great and happy and not as clingy but past 6pm only I can settle her which isn't great as I would like to do bedtime with my 3 year old too

INeedNewShoes Thu 02-Nov-17 21:04:56

You could try you sleeping hugging a cot sheet tonight then put it on the cot tomorrow evening and warm it gently with a warm hot water bottle.

The warmth and your smell might help comfort her.

I agree with aiming to put her to bed awake.

This is very random and might be specific to my baby (also 5 months) but her babysitter (I'm working two evenings a week) discovered completely by accident that she can get my baby to go from screaming to calm by gently swilling water around a little bottle next to her. Apparently she is mesmerised by it for long enough to calm her down! Worth a try?

I'd be experimenting with different ways to calm baby without lifting her out of the cot.

GodIsDead Thu 02-Nov-17 21:04:58

My son did the exact same thing with the next2me...I even got a nice mattress for it but he knew it wasn’t my bed and would cry his eyes out. I ended up cosleeping with him until last week (he’s 9 months old) when I bought a travel cot and a nice mattress (I’m obsessed with nice mattresses!) and put it next to my bed where the next2me was. Honestly it’s been much easier than I imagined to get him to sleep in it. He’ll cry a little but I just shush him and rub his back and he drops off within 5 minutes. I wish I would’ve gotten the travel cot months ago!

user1508013898 Thu 02-Nov-17 21:37:33

Hmmm wonder if it is the next to me. I co slept with my now 3 year old and thought the next to me would help this time. I've got a cot set up in her room when I'm ready to put her in it. She's fast asleep in my bed now and settled no problem in there

Afternooncatnap Thu 02-Nov-17 22:08:03

This might be a unsuitable suggestion but have you thought about putting her in her own room or further away from you.

My ds was in our room until 9 months. The reason he went into his own room was because he was ill and wanted to sleep on me. By 3am after I don't know how many times of him crying me picking him up him being returned to cot sleeping then 10 minutes later him crying again, in an act of tired desperation I put him in his cot in his bedroom. He fell straight asleep and didn't wake again.

I think when I wasn't there he just accepted that he needed to sleep in the bed.

user1508013898 Fri 03-Nov-17 06:49:30

Think I'm going to try her own room next. She's nearly 6 months now and it may do us both some good. Despite struggling with the sleep situation I always find the transition of them going in their own room difficult.

Afternooncatnap Fri 03-Nov-17 08:29:29

Good luck. I hope you find something that works.

It's lovley that our babies want to sleep cuddled up to us. But so not practical.

crazycatlady5 Fri 03-Nov-17 08:49:47

I would side car the cot for now next to your bed to get the most rest, this is the set up we have with my now 9 month old. When I night wean her I will put her in her own room on a floor bed (safety proof the room). Some babies just don’t like cots.

FATEdestiny Fri 03-Nov-17 08:51:32

A crib-sized cosleeper is a small space for many 5 month olds. You could remove the side off your full sized cot and make a sidecar cot.

user1508013898 Fri 03-Nov-17 18:33:16

The co sleeper is really big. She has loads of space in it yet. I'm going. To try her in her big cot in her own room tonight. From 5pm onwards she is very very clingy. I can deal with this when my husband is here but when he is away bedtime with the baby and my 3year old is very difficult confused

dotdotdotmustdash Fri 03-Nov-17 18:38:30

When my little ones moved into cots at 4-5 months old we had a toy which attached to the side of the cot which played a tune and had an underwater light show which lasted 5 minutes or so. They were mesmerised by it and would always stop to watch or listen. If they were still awake after it finished we would just start it again and again until they fell asleep. It worked for both of them two years apart and became their nightly routine for a long time.

user1508013898 Fri 03-Nov-17 20:41:49

Been in her own bed since 7pm.. cried briefly but went back to sleep. I wish I could relax but keep checking her

Afternooncatnap Fri 03-Nov-17 22:00:42

Sounds promising

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