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Co-sleeping - adult positions

(14 Posts)
TheLette Fri 20-Oct-17 10:48:14

Hi, struggling to get my newborn down independently (have tried rocking crib, Next to Me, and Moses basket, all with Sleepyhead inside but it rarely works at night and I've decided it's not worth the hassle of trying). I am therefore co-sleeping. I have read about how to make this safe but haven't found much information about what position I can sleep in - is it only on my back with baby on top of me, or on my side in a C position with baby on my side? Just wondering if I can sleep on my front or back, especially if sharing the bed with only the baby so there is plenty of space (my partner will be in the spare room)? Thanks!

kikibo Fri 20-Oct-17 11:17:01

I co-slept about 2 months with my daughter, though she sleeps nicely in her cot for the moment.

I slept C with her head at eye height. I considered sleeping with a tiny baby like that on you risky as they can slip and you won't notice. I also caught myself once with my head slumped on hers, which made her whine in my ear 😊 so I woke up. That's when I changed to eye height because that way I wouldn't be able to slump.
I also wrapped my duvet only around me with her in a sleeping bag next to me.

That's my 2 cents, but I haven't really looked into it, though my midwife who's been 40+ years in the business didn't seem to think it necessary to make too much of this. Common sense I reckon.

In fact I didn't consider co-sleeping, felt bemused when baby wouldn't sleep in her cot and then asked the midwife how to do that. She just looked at me with pity and said: "oh, she just wants to be with you, she misses you. Just take her. Give her time." I guess I was kind of looking for approval...

CaptainsCat Fri 20-Oct-17 11:54:46

Don't sleep with the baby on you. I always slept in the C shape with pillows and duvet well out of the way.

mrsfee Fri 20-Oct-17 12:05:13

Hi

I co slept initially with my premie as he would not settle in his next to me. I would put him in it initially but he always ended up in with us. I slept on my side, C shape, with a pillow behind me so I rested slightly on my back.

Now happy in his cot at 16 months, not that he goes down awake yet! Still co sleeps occasionally for an afternoon nap...so I can lie down too πŸ˜‚

Lallypopstick Fri 20-Oct-17 14:34:16

The Infant Sleep Information Source website has info and pictures.

www.isisonline.org.uk/image-archive/

NameChange30 Fri 20-Oct-17 14:38:44

"is it only on my back with baby on top of me, or on my side in a C position with baby on my side"

Er NO! Do not sleep with the baby lying on you, that's not safe! The baby should be lying on its back on the mattress. You can lie next to the baby, on your side, with baby's head level with your chest, your arm stretched out above the baby's head, and your knees bent towards the baby, so you're sort of encircling the baby IYSWIM? Having your arms and legs in that position should stop you rolling onto the baby.

Presumably you've tried a swaddle?

NameChange30 Fri 20-Oct-17 14:42:30

Lally
Some of those photos are ridiculously cute!
And some of the babies are a bit too close to the pillow(s) for my liking... I have always been careful to keep DS away from the pillows and certainly not head touching.

TheLette Fri 20-Oct-17 15:38:29

Thanks! I read that swaddling is not a good idea when co-sleeping as they could overheat but we do swaddle when trying to get her down in a crib / Moses basket etc.

I'm fine with the C position for most of the night, I just get uncomfortable after a few hours due to the pressure on my hips which is why I was hoping that sleeping on my back would be ok. Sounds like no though πŸ˜”

CaptainsCat Fri 20-Oct-17 16:05:06

The C position does get uncomfortable, but I think with a newborn I'd stick with it, because from what I've read it's the safest way to co sleep. Rest assured that by the time you are co sleeping with a 2.5 year old (grin) you can both sprawl out however you want!

NameChange30 Fri 20-Oct-17 16:11:38

I think you could sleep on your back next to the baby - just not with the baby lying on you.

ICantDecideOnAUsername Fri 20-Oct-17 16:37:43

I'm not advocating this but I slept with ds2 across my chest for about 4 months as I had no other choice. I tried to put him next to me but he would not sleep on anything but me.
I propped my arms up on either side with pillows so I could hold onto him and he wouldn't slip off (I had my arms round him and would link my fingers together to keep them there) and covered him with a cellular blanket. Luckily I don't move when I sleep. I didn't however sleep much in that time as I woke every time he moved (although bearing in mind he was feeding every 2 hours I wouldn't have anyway!). Done out of necessity.
I'm not sure if it had anything to do with him being really ill when he was tiny. I had to sleep with him like this in hospital and the nurses didn't blink an eyelid.

uniquehornsonly Fri 20-Oct-17 17:20:21

I propped my arms up on either side with pillows so I could hold onto him and he wouldn't slip off (I had my arms round him and would link my fingers together to keep them there) and covered him with a cellular blanket. Luckily I don't move when I sleep.

Snap. I had to do this the DC2 for the first 2 months as he absolutely would not sleep any other way. I used one of those big v-shaped cushions behind/around me to prop my arms but otherwise the same.

I slept in a doze rather than a full sleep and woke enough at every stir to check, feed, etc. It was more sleep than I got with DC1 though (who would lie on his back but only for 40 mins at a time...)

TheLette Sat 21-Oct-17 14:50:30

The midwife turned up this morning and seemed to think that me lying flat on my back or front when co-sleeping would be fine - just in case anyone else is interested.

HopeAndJoy16 Sat 21-Oct-17 18:33:08

I often start in a C shape and end up on my back, and as long as the duvet isn't near baby I don't see the problem. I also find the C shape uncomfortable on my back and hips. Using a V pillow behind my back helps though x

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