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9 Week old sleeping on stomache

(29 Posts)
Lunaloo00 Sat 23-Sep-17 15:21:29

My baby sleeps great on my chest which i don't mind so much for daytime naps, but I'm getting to the point of allowing her to sleep on me after she wakes for a feed in the night (about 6am until 10am)
She'll go back in her moses basket if i spent a while settling her but some nights out can take ages and she still moans and groans when i put her down
I'm not concerned about rolling on her etc I'm a very light sleeper, but i don't want her getting attached to sleeping on me! And i can't sleep properly with a farting person on my chest lol
So as she sleeps great on her front, i tried daytime naps on her front and she slept great!
So last night i put her on her front, watched her for about an hour so i was happy that she could move her head side to side and then i let her sleep and instead of waking every 2 hours, she slept 4 hours, woke for a feed and slept until i woke her up 4 hours later.
She was born 9lb8 and from day one has had a pretty strong neck
Surely belly sleeping if I'm going to allow it, is much safer in her basket with a flat mattress?
If she's on her back shell either wake up as soon as i put her down, or make her self jump by waving her arms around

Does anybody else let their young baby sleep on their front? I'm asking because i know it's not recommended so of course i can't ask my health visitor for advice!

crazycatlady5 Sat 23-Sep-17 15:32:41

Would she sleep next to you instead of on you? So that you can rest still while she's in contact with you? I would just safely cosleep - my little one did and went in her bednest at about 3 months no problems that was until the 4 month sleep regression and everything went to pot

Lunaloo00 Sat 23-Sep-17 15:39:33

My partner is a heavy sleeper the risk of him rolling over onto her is far too high! I don't think it's the contact or wanting to be with me, it's just that she likes it on her belly
When she's sleepy in the day time I'll put her on her side or front and shell self settle
Last night she was awake and self settled on her belly in her basket

pinksummer Sat 23-Sep-17 15:43:46

My DS2 was much happier sleeping on his front. I weighed up the risks of him sleeping on my chest all night with me becoming more and more exhausted or him asleep in his basket next me, with an Angelcare mat monitor on. I chose sleeping on his front and me getting sleep too.

Lunaloo00 Sat 23-Sep-17 15:51:50

I've been looking into those mats, reviews weren't great so i wasnt sure!

FATEdestiny Sat 23-Sep-17 18:29:12

The two biggest risk factors that increase the number of baby deaths due to SIDS is
(a) babies not sleeping on their back
(b) smoking

This is not a small, insignificant risk. The Back To Sleep campaign of the early 1990s cut the number of SIDS deaths (then called Cot Death) by over 80%.

There are no two ways about it, placing your baby on their front to sleep increases the risk of your baby dying. It is that simple.

That said, sleeping with baby in your arms is also a significant risk too - just of suffocation and smothering rather than SIDS. Neither are safe.

If you push the cot up to your bed, perhaps removing one side off the bed, baby can then sleep between you and the cot rather than in the middle between you and your partner.

If you cannot safely cosleep then you need to find a way to get baby sleeping in the cot/crib on back. A swaddle and dummy may help.

Lunaloo00 Sat 23-Sep-17 19:22:06

I'm 100000% aware of SIDS , which is why it's taken me over 9 weeks to give in and let her sleep that way.
She already has a dummy (which Funnily enough reduces the risk of SIDS)
Tried swaddling and she hates it.
I've tried it all, I've not taken to this decision lightly.
Nobody here smokes, and she's not yet in a cot so i can't lower the sides but even so- how does that help?! Its not being next to me that helps, did you read my post? :S :S

I'm not after reasons why i shouldn't do it, I'm not dumb, I've done hours of reading! I'm looking for advice on how to safely to do it, from peope who have had the same experience.
My mum had me on my tummy back when sids wasn't a big talk thing

aurorie11 Sat 23-Sep-17 19:30:27

My DD now almost 7, would only settle and sleep on her tummy. Yes it scared me, but we are non-smokers, she was in a cot next to me with a new mattress, in sleeping bag and checked temperature was ok in the room

FATEdestiny Sat 23-Sep-17 19:30:59

The point is that there is no safely way to do it. It is unsafe and you can manage that risk just as everyone does. The risk is still there.

I assume your reading and research led you to the findings that 2 months is the peak age for SIDS deaths. Mitigating the risks from a statistical point of view would be waiting until 4 months, when overall SIDS deaths reduce.

It is up to you. Please don't shoot the messenger.

LetMeChangeYourSocks Sat 23-Sep-17 19:46:53

My DS was the same OP! He had bad reflux and just grunted all night long. I did the same and tried him with day time naps first where I could watch him the whole time, and he had amazing head control so I tried at night time when he was about 6 weeks old and he slept so much better. I too had an angelcare sensor under his mattress and in 1 year have only had 1 false alarm and that was a few weeks ago. There’s a flashing light on it too so even in the night if you wake, if the light is flashing you will know they are breathing if you can’t hear...I couldn’t always due to DPs snoring 🙄

I’ll admit DP and I didn’t sleep for the first few nights out of panic but we soon relaxed.

I’m not going to say do it, it will be absolutely fine because I don’t know that. Just make sure you’re informed and make the best decision for you both if it’s safer than co sleeping and you’re all getting sleep.

Lunaloo00 Sat 23-Sep-17 19:53:48

The risk is still much lower than having her sleep on me
I could roll over, (unlikely but its a risk) she could overheat etc

Thanks Aurorie11 I seem to find more people online who do this than don't, some babies just won't settle any other way!
Some nights she's absolutely nocked out before we even go upstairs and even a bomb wouldn't wake her, so on those nights thered be no need to put her on her front... But it's when she wakes a few hours later that we've got into the routine of sleeping together because now she's awake She wont go on her back, she kicks and wiggles then the dummy falls out

At the minute i took these steps
Remove all blankets
Firm mattress
Elevate the mattress at one end slightly

Dummy didn't fall out until shed gone to sleep and i watched her for an hour
I didnt sleep much obviously from watching her

The facts are, SIDS is extremely rare. I know a group of medicals say it can increase SIDS which is why i barely slept... Id definitely prefer her to not be on her stomach!

Lunaloo00 Sat 23-Sep-17 19:56:03

Thanks I'm going to have another look at these matts!

Beardedandbalded Sat 23-Sep-17 19:57:18

Absolutely agree with what Fateanddestiny said. Peak age for SIDS is 10-12 weeks. Don't do it.

FenellaMaxwellsPony Sat 23-Sep-17 20:00:44

I just want to point out that the mats etc do NOT prevent SIDS - by the time the alarm goes off, your baby isn't breathing and if it's SIDS then it's already too late.

I'm afraid the best thing you can do is just persist with putting her down on her back and eventually she will get used to it.

iMatter Sat 23-Sep-17 20:21:46

Ds2 much preferred sleeping on his front but I persevered with getting him to sleep on his back because of the SIDS risk. It was incredibly hard and I almost gave in on a number of occasions.

NerrSnerr Sat 23-Sep-17 20:26:26

My youngest has always tried to get himself on his stomach. Up until about 4.5 months he could get himself on his stomach but not his way back so we put him back on his back every time he did it (or when we woke and noticed). He's now 5.5 months and can roll freely so we let him sleep how he wants (even though I'm still anxious and spend half the night feeling his back to check he's breathing!)

I agree with PP. A sensor mat won't help with SIDS, by the time you're alerted it's too late.

FATEdestiny Sat 23-Sep-17 20:42:04

At the minute i took these steps....
Elevate the mattress at one end slightly

You are doing this in an attempt to increase safety?! Making informed risks is ones prerogative, this is ill-informed.

Read up on the babynest death - well publicised. The risk factors in the case were
- 7 week old, peak age for SIDS deaths
- placed to sleep on tummy
- crib inclined steeply
- side half up, half down

Young baby, lacking in muscle control, slid sideways/downwards due to inclined crib. Neck caught over side of crib and due to tummy position blocked airways.

To minimise the risks baby should be on a firm, flat, seperate mattress

Namebot Sat 23-Sep-17 20:46:44

I'm not dumb, I've done hours of reading! I'm looking for advice on how to safely to do it, from peope who have had the same experience.

I don't think you are dumb, you are trying to find a way for your baby to sleep safely. However, there is no safe way to help a baby sleep safely on their front. The back to sleep campaign save about 1000 babies in the first year alone which is a dramatic decrease. Yes, overheating and smoking are other risk factors which you are avoiding but tummy sleeping will increase your baby's risk of SIDS.

pinkpantsrock Sat 23-Sep-17 20:55:43

The risk is your to take. I took the same risk with both my boys, i brought angle care sleeping monitor, for some peace of mind. But boy my boys where strong chaps,no health probs, fed well, no dummies (didn't need them) DS1went on front from 4 weeks, DS2 went on front from 2.5 weeks.

All the advise in the world comes down to...... ITS YOUR RISK.

pinkpantsrock Sat 23-Sep-17 20:57:07

both my boys now 4 & 1.5yrs,

Keep the cot or basket empty, no bumpers or teddies, clothing not too hot as sleeping on chest keeps heat in

Lunaloo00 Sat 23-Sep-17 21:38:25

Fatedestiny 'crib inclined steeply' where did i say i elevated her crib steeply? The amount the mattress is raised you wouldn't even be able to tell by just looking at it

For the others with personal experience thank you for your answers, i feel hope knowing that it's not tooooo much longer until she's 4 months old (the first 2 months flew by anyway) so for now I'll stick to day time belly naps

I heard those mats give off alot of false alarms which is why i didn't bother with one
My baby also likes to fall sleep (if she's has to be on her back) with a blanket touching her face, so i have to wait until she's fast on and then remove it
Then she wakes up an hour later lol the joys of having babies!

FATEdestiny Sat 23-Sep-17 22:37:18

I'm not trying to have a go Lunaloo00. If you are seeking to make everything else as safe as it possibly could be, do not incline the cot. It is safest when kept flat and not inclined, steeply or otherwise.

There is no need to be defensive. You are speaking here to someone who off-and-on coslept whilst both parents were smokers. I understand managed risks.

Managing risks means properly understanding the nature of the risks and making an informed decision. You categorically do not need to be getting defensive and stripey when simply being presented with the indisputable facts.

The Lullaby Trust are the UK body wh8ch researches SIDS risk to inform government and NHS policy on SIDS reduction. I would suggest a read of the evidence base but in the mean-time advicadvice is a firm and flat mattress and while you are there:

pinkpantsrock Sun 24-Sep-17 07:34:53

i used a book under the basket to raise it up slightly, i found rising the bed did nothing. My DS1 was bad sleeper from the start, i put him down for day time nap on his belly and he slept for 7 hrs!!!

DS1 never had false alarm...DS2 we only had when he had rolled into corners of bed, least you know the alarm is working! i'd sprint out of bed every time i heard it - nothing bad ever happened but just in case

Lunaloo00 Sun 24-Sep-17 09:32:55

We were back to back sleeping last night which means I'm shattered haha. Waking up every half hour because dummy has fallen out or she's just making sleepy noises which wakes me up- does none of this on her belly sad
I'll catch up on daytime naps for now.

Fatedestiny i didn't mean to come across as up tight as i did, just had a grumpy baby yesterday. I just didn't really need the copy and paste information from Google answers, but either way i appreciate you replying and understand it's a touchy subject. Id obviously prefer to be safe rather than sorry but i had quite a few friends with children tell me they let their baby belly sleep and it got me thinking that's why i post here.

I a few weeks I'm going to bring the cot into my room, shell hate that but she's growing so fast!

BayLeaves Sun 24-Sep-17 09:45:36

I'm not going to tell you it's safe but sometimes you have to evaluate the risk for yourself and decide - both my babies have been bad sleepers and we don't follow 100% of the safe sleep guidelines because if we did, we'd all get even less sleep. I weigh up the increased risk of SIDS with an increased risk of us having a car accident on the way to drop my older son off pre-school, or me losing concentration and slipping on the stairs while carrying baby etc.

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