3 year old up at 5.30, AND through the night

[GlummyMummy]

I've posted on here about my daughter's sleep before, but this is definitely the worst "phase" yet!!!!!!

For the last few weeks, she's started waking up at 5.30am for the day. Early starts are hard going, and it's such a long day, but just been making sure we get to bed by 9pm ourselves.

I could maybe cope with these early mornings if that's all it was, but she is also up through the night too, usually 1 or 2am, so she's really not getting much sleep and neither are we. And we have no evening, as by the time she goes down at 7.30/8 (we also have a fuss getting her to bed), we only have an hour to ourselves before we need to get to bed!

Completely exhausted , was hoping it was just another phase but it seems to be becoming a habit. Tried everything - reward sticker chart, bribery, nap, no nap, early bed, later bed etc.

Hoping someone has some advice please. I've not been well, so been really struggling. She slept for 12 hours for about a year so we know she can do it!!!!!

[JustMumNowNotMe]

What are you doing when whe wakes in the night? Does she go to sleep at bedtime independently?

[JustMumNowNotMe]

Oh as for the 12 hours, 10 hours can be enough for a lot of children so don't fixate on the 12 hours bit

[EvenFlo2]

No words of advice but I wanted to say I feel your pain. My DS has been exactly the same for well over 12 months. I feel destroyed!

Have you tried the gro clock? Didn't work for us but others seem to have success with it...

[cowbag1]

Have you tried a Grow Clock? Ds has had one since the bars came off his cot at 2yo and he never comes out of his room before the time we set it for. Some days he will wake before this time but will happily play in his room be himself until "the sunshine comes up". I think it helps to have something tangible to explain the time as it's such an abstract concept at this age, especially at the moment as it's light outside when they should be sleeping!

[MollyHuaCha]

Poor you! My aim might be to wear her out during the day with loads of outdoor exercise - long walks, running, trampolining, cycling.

Also, no sugary food or caffeine (such as chocolate) after 2pm.

Good luck! Hope it improves.

[user1498544946]

Hi there I'm hoping the mummies can help with a similar issue that I'm at my wits end on. My 2 year old (23 months) has been a good sleeper since 6 months (before that he was terrible and we did a couple of rounds of controlled crying) but 4 weeks ago we took the sides off his cot as I'm pregnant and we need it in a few months. The first few nights were great slept right through no problems. Since then he wakes up every 2/3 hours. He cries initially in his bed then leaves eventually until we find him hysterical in the hall. When we eventually do go to him all we have to say is "go back to bed" and point him in the right direction and he does. Dosent take more than 1 minute to settle. I can't go on with this little sleep but no idea what to do?!?! The supernanny just quietly putting him back to bed dosent seem to make a difference as he wants to be back in bed - dosent want to play. I wondered about putting a gate on his door and just letting him cry awful as that will be to see if he eventually realises he just needs to go back to bed on his own?!?! He has a little night light so can see fine. HELP!!!!! Xxxx

[GlummyMummy]

Thanks for the replies folks! Similar to User, we just have to point her towards her bedroom and she goes back in. At 2am, she will go back to sleep quickly, but at 5.30 she'll go quiet for 5 minutes then come back through to us again, this goes on repeatedly until we give up and just get up! Have tried putting her lamp on and giving her toys to play with in her room but this doesn't work, she just cries for us! So no chance of her being up at 5.30 while we go back to sleep unfortunately!!!

At bedtime we have had the same routine since she was very small. Last 4 months or so, she will jump out of bed as soon as we put light out and say goodnight, we put her back in and say sleepytime, this goes on for usually 20-30 minutes before she finally gives up and goes to sleep. I should add that she still has a dummy at night though we are hoping to ditch that soon (that's another story!!!)

I would be more than happy if she had 10 hours straight, but she's only having 6 hours at the most before waking.

Oh EvenFlo, 12 months is awful!!! How do you cope?!? Does your child still nap?

Molly, good tip, I do try and get her tired out through the day but she's not a naturally active child (she's mentally active rather than physically active) so isn't interested in cycling or running about much. Doesn't help that she's knackered from lack of sleep of course!!! 😃

Going to try a gro-clock I think. Been a bit reluctant as I think it might just give her yet another distraction from sleep and something else to faff about with!!! 😂

User, so is he not actually coming into your room? Might be worth trying the stairgate in that case? As long as your neighbours don't mind...we're always conscious about our daughter screeching on the landing!

So frustrating when I talk to friends, their kids all sleep through for 12 hours straight. Good to know it's not just us, thanks everyone!

[user1498544946]

Sounds like we are in the same nightmare! I've never posted on here before that's how desperate I am hahah!!!! He eventually comes into our room from the hall. He is ususal hysterical by this point! We are in a detached house so technically he can scream all he likes - just our nerves that will be shot 😂

[GlummyMummy]

Wonder if it's a separation thing then, it's like they are just checking we're still there! Does your little one play independently during the day? My daughter used to but now back to following me around the house!

We've been having issues with her behaviour too and I just know it would all improve if she wasnt so over-tired.

[FATEdestiny]

Is she a just-turned 3 or a nearly 4 year old? Has she bedn out of the cot long?

These sound like behaviour issues surrounded by not appreciating that she must stay in bed to sleep. This tends to arise with stopping cot use before child is intellectually ready to make this assumption.

If you have a just turned 3 year old and changing from cot to bed is fairly recent, I'd go back to cot. Harder to do this once the poor associations to the bed are already ingrained.

[user1498544946]

My son is not quite 2. I do wonder if you are right that it simply was too early to let him out. It feels like the wrong decision to go back now though so not sure how to approach.

[GlummyMummy]

My daughter has just turned 3 but has been out the cot for nearly a year and in a cotbed.

[EvenFlo2]

My DS has been doing this for at least 12 months (he's 3.5 now).

No he doesn't nap during the day although he is knackered! If he does allow himself to fall asleep then even 15 mins of a power nap results in him going to sleep much much later at night.

Good luck with the gro clock, my DS just turned it off! Had to give him some credit on the day he said he was allowed to wake up because the 'real sun' was awake outside his window....

[GlummyMummy]

Oh Flo, I feel your pain!!!! Is he happy to play quietly in his room at 5.30am? No chance of that in our house 😞 And how is his behaviour through the day?

[EvenFlo2]

He will 'read' to his toys for a bit but then starts trying to do karate or stair bannister climbing so it's really stressful!

His behaviour is generally that of a tired child by about 2pm. I would just accept the lack of sleep if he was actually ok with it but I don't think he is! What 'behaviour issues' are you having?

I don't get it - he is tired, he could sleep as much as he wanted but he doesn't want to. These are the glory years for sleep and he is missing them!!

[GlummyMummy]

He sounds exactly like my daughter! She mopes around most of the day like a grumpy teenager, whining about being sleepy. Then come "sleepy time" she's the life and soul of the party!

Afternoons are particularly bad here too, she never really wants to do much, would happily veg on the sofa all afternoon in front of the tv, if I'd let her!

We have been having some problems with her pushing and hitting other kids, plus I do find her concentration levels are zilch, won't settle to anything unless it's CBeebies!

Does your son go down to bed ok and sleep through till 5.30? Be really interested to know how much sleep other 3 year olds are having as the most she'll sleep in a row is 6 hours just now.