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Hand hold needed - starting cc with 21month old tonight

(15 Posts)
bettybyebye Sun 14-May-17 19:13:54

Dd has always been a good sleeper, until about 6/7 weeks ago when it all went to pot. We used to be able to put her in the cot at 7pm with her dummy, bunny and bottle of milk and she would nod off by herself, listening to lullabies. For the last few weeks we have ended up cuddling her to sleep (on an armchair in her room) and it's taking longer and longer each night (9pm last night). She is suffering in the day because she is so shattered. DH and I are fed up of losing 1.5hrs of our evening, we also have a 4.5 yo DS who is an early riser so need to go to bed relatively early.

I have been happy to cuddle her for the last few weeks as thought it was just a phase but I am really struggling with it now so want to try to change.

So she went in her cot at 7.04pm. The first timer was set for 2 mins, then 3mins, now 5mins. Any handholding or advice welcome!

DearTeddyRobinson Sun 14-May-17 19:23:39

Hang in there! It's horrible but it is for her benefit if she's knackered during the day.
How are her daytime naps? Are the longer, brighter evenings making it harder for her to drop off? We've just put up one of those blackout gro-blinds in our 15 month old's room for that reason.

FreedomMummy Sun 14-May-17 19:25:36

We've just had to do similar with our 32 mth old and it was hard but so very worth it. Hang in there.

Lukeandlorelai4Ever Sun 14-May-17 19:27:23

My dd went through the same at exact same age. I tried to do cc for about 5 mins but failedblush
Ended up shortening her nap to 2 hours max, putting her to her cot at 8 and lying beside cot. She would be asleep by 8.30.
One of us stil hop in beside her at bedtime and she's 4 now. But no naps now and she's in bed at 7pm and asleep by 7.20.
Would shorter nap work?

bettybyebye Sun 14-May-17 19:37:24

Thanks for replies. The worsening of her sleep definitely happened around the time of the clock change, but there is now a gro blind and blackout curtains in her room so nice and dark. She is still screaming 😓 Timer up to 7 minute intervals. I feel like caving in. How long did it take to work for you guys? What should I be doing when I go in? I am giving her a little cuddle, passing the dummy back to her and telling her to lie down and cuddle bunny...

bettybyebye Sun 14-May-17 19:40:06

Ok so timer has just gone off and she is not crying, so should I wait till she next cries before going in? Seems daft to go in if she's not crying...

JoWithABow Sun 14-May-17 19:41:58

Does she nap in the day? Perhaps she's struggling to go to sleep because she's not that tired?

Toomuchocolate Sun 14-May-17 19:43:42

IDd go in and sit by her cot.

NSEA Sun 14-May-17 19:45:47

32 month old ? That's a 4 months off being 3!

Good luck op. I hear you don't go in unless crying. Do you have a video monitor?

bettybyebye Sun 14-May-17 19:47:33

Sorry forgot to say she naps for between 1hr and 1.5hrs in the day, but I think she still really needs that. For the last few weeks she has been really obviously tired a lot - yawning, rubbing eyes and has big spark shadows under her eyes so I think she is running a big sleep deficit. She has always needed a lot more sleep than my DS.

Timer is now up to 8 minutes and Ashe is being quieter for longer periods. If she cries again I may try sitting on the floor next to you think that will help things or make them worse?

0dfod Sun 14-May-17 19:50:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bettybyebye Sun 14-May-17 19:59:26

Thanks! Last went in at 7.43 and she is quiet...I really wish I had a video monitor!

CPtart Sun 14-May-17 20:14:34

Do not go in! And do not speak to her! Short term pain....good luck!

bettybyebye Sun 14-May-17 20:43:58

Ok so I just checked on her and she is fast asleep 😊 So the last time I went in to her was 7.43pm and the last time she made a noise on the monitor was around 8pm - not crying but a little murmuring.

Thank you so much for posting and helping me to stay strong because I think I would have given in otherwise. It took a lot less time tonight than I thought it would, I know we will have to keep doing this for at least the rest of this week but feeling a lot more positive so thank you all flowers

bettybyebye Tue 16-May-17 08:33:53

So after falling asleep before 8pm on night one, Dd slept for 12 hours straight and I had to wake her yesterday morning for nursery.

Night 2 last night we went for the same method, and she was settled by 7.15! And again slept for more than 12 hours straight, I woke her up at 7.30 for nursery.

Since bedtimes started being difficult she also started waking in the night again and wanti to get into bed with me, when previously she had always slept through. So the fact that she has slept through the last two nights as well is really positive

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