6month old demand breast feeding still?

[LilaG]

What does everybody do?! 6month old EBF DS still feeds 2-3hourly round the clock 😕 Initially I was happy to just 'feed on demand', I guess hoping he would just naturally stretch out the time between feeding overnight, but it's becoming apparent he isn't going to, and in fact he is actually feeding 2hourly overnight now and rarely even going 3hours 😴 (feeds well in the day too and we have started weaning).
After speaking with my HV she has now explained that he is not needing those night feeds as he has jumped 2 centiles and it is just for comfort. She has suggested I need to aim to reduce to 2 feeds per night aiming for no night feeds by the time he is 12months, which sounds sensible, however how the hell do I do this?! He does fall asleep with his dummy so isn't reliant on me at initial bedtime...but try as I might he will not settle for anything other than breast feed when he wakes in the night.
What to do?....how do I convince him he doesn't need boob every 2hours?!

[Privateandconfidentialplease]

My dc's both fed on demand the whole time. I remember I tried a few times to send in the oh or to offer water at night but they were not having it. 6 months is still quite small so don't give yourself a hard time. Mine went for longer gaps at night in their own time. Plus I co-slept alot.

[LilaG]

Morning 😊 Yea same here...tried last night to just give him his dummy back and sending DH in to try and settle him but he was having non of it!
I guess I'm not too worried at the minute..although I am very tired! I'm concerned however as I'm back to work in 6weeks, which will sometimes mean I am not here at bedtime as I work shifts. Poor DS (and DH 🙈) are going to have some very challenging evenings as at the minute he goes to bed at 6:30ish no probs...but then he wakes 2hourly and needs boob. I won't be home until 10:30 when I'm working a late shift 😥

[PineQueen]

It does tail off but at 6 months presumably he's still learning to eat solids and so milk will be a massive part of his calorie intake for months yet. It will reduced naturally if you just go with the flow.

I've nursed two children into toddlerhood now, demand feeding well into the second year. It definitely gets easier!!

[pitterpatterrain]

Just hit 6 months and still demand feeding here, DD upped her night feeds to 11-3-5 and so we are trying to cut one at least (she is in bed 8pm-8am-ish)

The plan is DH will settle for one wake up as she is going increasing stretches during the day, not seeming that fussed until 3-4 hours now (recent change)

I know each baby is their own but prior DD was EBF and slept fully through from about 8 months so I am thinking we can slowly get to that point too

[NuffSaidSam]

What are you going to do re. milk when you go back to work? If you're going to introduce a bottle I'd start doing that now so it's not too stressful for him/you/DH/nursery when you go back. Once he will take a bottle from DH he'll hopefully settle better for him. I would persevere with sending DH in with a dummy because of the back to work issue.

[LilaG]

Hi ladies, thank you all for the replies! So hopefully things will naturally progress and he will start to feed off of me less as we increase solids 🤞🏻
Regarding the milk intake when I go back to work...it is a massive worry! He won't take a bottle (although continue to try everyday and does seem less resistant the older he is getting?!)...although HV advised me that there was no point starting bottles now and to just give him formula in a sippy cup in preparation for when I return to work? Really hoping in the next 6 weeks he will increase food intake and manage sippy cup?! Then DH can settle him to bed with dummy (which I think will work ok...but like I said previous- it's the waking 2hours after that and needing breast feed to settle I'm worried about even more so!) x

[LilaG]

Also waking every 2hours through the nights is starting feel very tiring! I have a responsible job within the NHS so obviously I need to be on 'top form' when I'm back at work not making mistakes because I am so tired and/or worrying about DS at home 😕
Anyway...I think I'll try again tonight to get DH to settle him at alternate wakes and see how we get on! He was going crazy last night and having non of it! They're not daft these babies are they?! X

[lovecreameggs]

My daughter fed every 2 hours at night until she was 18 months (no daytime feeds) and then suddenly dropped it to one feed in the night and a bedtime feed. I have a demanding high level job and honestly, you just get used to it.

The one thing I did find help was to love the bedtime feed so she now has feed, toothbrush, book, lights out and then me telling her a story, I think that's what caused her to drop the overnight feeds BUT I don't think she was ready for that until 18 months, as I was able to explain that she'd had her bedtime milk and now it was story time.

[LilaG]

18months...wow! Like you say...you must have just got used to it? The 2hourly wakes are starting to get to me now...feel in a bit of daze today lol!...maybe I'll come out other side too and start to feel it's normal?!!
For the 1st time he has actually took 2oz of formula from a bottle at tea time!...no idea why but it's a good start! X

[lovecreameggs]

Mine never took a bottle although I never tried formula (she has cmpa). It is tiring but I have always found that I'm rather lazy and won't do any change that requires commitment and I cannot tolerate her being upset when she can't understand why I'm withholding milk. Now she's older she can understand that so it's a lot easier.

I always think as well that the time it takes to implement a change then she'd probably have developed and changed her sleeping slightly anyway so there's not much point getting het up about it, just roll with it and eventually it'll get better.

[positivity123]

This sounds similar to what my DD was doing. She's also six months. I put her in her own room for a week and would still feed on demand throughout the night but I tried to reduce the length of time I was feeding her for so it was only 2 or 3 mins which made me realise that she wasn't actually hungry.
I tried 1 night of comforting her without feeding her and was picking her up and changing aongs words but she became hysterical so I fed her.
The next night I took a different approach and when she cried I went in and gave her a bit of water from a bottle to quench any thirst then I sushed and patted her and sang a song on repeat. I didnt pick her up but I never left her. She cried for an hour and 20 mins then dropped off. She was never angry crying though just very tired crying. She woke up twice more and I did the same and it took 20 mins those times. When she woke at 5am I gave her a feed and she went back down. The following night she woke up once and it took ten mins to get her back to sleep and the same the next night. From then on she's slept 7.30pm until 5am,,proper feed, then again until 7am.
I know a lot of people are against sleep training but I was starting to get very down about lack of sleep and was becoming tearful during the day when I'm usually a very upbeat person so I did what I felt was right for me and for my daughter. I've noticed she is eating more regularly during the day but she is sick less often. I would go back to nursing at night and or co-sleep cosleeping if ever she's ill or teething.

[LilaG]

Wow this gives me hope! I need to do this...I'm the same..feeling low in mood with the long term lack of sleep. Things have actually got worse since I initially posted and he is now waking every 1-2 hours- sometimes settles after feed, other times won't settle back into cot so I've been co-sleeping after 2am....which is just not for me and I don't want to do it.
Contemplating ringing HV again today to get some cleaner advise on the sleep training before the co-sleeping becomes a long term habit.
I could probably mentally prepare myself for a few rough nights...and I agree with you completely that a few tired cries is worth it in the long run for the happiness of everybody!...however...I have a feeling DS will be screaming hysterical and clearly I can't do that for any period of time. Can't believe how quickly things have deteriorated and got this bad! It's quite frightening really. Poor DD1(3) keeps asking why I'm sad 😕

[lovecreameggs]

It could well be teething so I'd consider that before letting them cry for hours, also with thinking about whether you'd like to sob in your bed for over an hour co sleeping is no habit at 6 months, use it to get through now and when it's settled down you'll be fine to start getting him used to a separate space. I part time co slept, so brought dd in on her first wake up. This worked well because she got used to going to bed without me in the bed with her but let me get the most sleep possible and as the wake ups got less frequent then so did the co sleeping.

Also your hv has no idea whether your boy needs night feeds or not. There is no rule to say babies of 6 months suddenly aren't hungry or thirsty in the night - hell im awake at 4 am on holiday because I'm thirsty and wouldn't mind a snack and I'm 34!

[positivity123]

I'm the same with co-sleeping LilaG I did from about 2am onwards but I'm naturally a very heavy sleeper so with DD next to me I couldn't sleep properly so I'd be knackered in the morning. On Mumsnet co-sleeping is always recommended and I agree it helps but you have to do what works for you and your baby.
I can't remember who said it on one of these sleep boards but she said that you choose what you want to do and stick to it that is the kindest for the baby. I felt by staying with my DD but not picking her up she could trust me to allow her to sleep. I felt like by feeding her back to sleep every hour i was pissing her off because when she woke up she was like 'where's the boob I fell asleep on?! '
I planned to do the sleep training on a particular day but my DD was teething so I pushed it back a few days when she seemed more settled.
I would recommend the water to check she's not thirsty.