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One year old started waking and difficult to get back to sleep - any advice?

(4 Posts)
solomonrulesok Fri 14-Apr-17 08:25:40

My DS2 is one next week. He started sleeping through at around 8 months. He's never been that great at night sleeping however. We were on the verge of getting a sleep trainer at around 7 months but tried the gradual retreat method, which seemed to work. That, or he just reached an age where he just slept better!
He's great in the day in the cot. If he's tired I can just put him down and he self settles. A bit more tricky if we are out. Takes a bit longer and he won't sleep as long but he will go off.
He sleeps roughly 2-2.5 hours during the day in two naps. One short in am and longer one after lunch.
At night he also self settles. Bath time, milk, put down.
However, he has started waking around 1:30 am and screams until I pick him up. It then usually takes me to hold, rock, pat and shush him for up to an hour before he goes to sleep again. If we are lucky he'll sleep to 7. If not he'll wake again at 5am and then it's usually game over. Help!
We have been giving him milk at 1:30am but I just don't think he's hungry. I think it's a development thing and now a habit.
Any tips to help get him back sleeping or is it a case of riding it out as best we can?!
Am v tired and going back to work very soon plus have DS1 to look after too so am struggling a little xx

solomonrulesok Fri 14-Apr-17 08:27:16

Sorry he started sleeping through at 8 months but has started waking again about a month ago. We have moved house but this was after he started waking. He's crawling and pulling up but not walking yet and I wonder if it's a wonder week phase?

FATEdestiny Fri 14-Apr-17 09:21:23

The same principles of gradual withdrawal can be used for the night wake, the same as you used before.

I realise this will be exhausting in the night, I kept the cot in my room until baby was consistantly sleeping throygh for exactly this reason - much easier to be consistant consistent in teaching independant sleep if I can be comfortable and dose at the same time as soitjibg baby.

What you are doing sounds great: hold, rock, pat and shush him, except I wouldnt pick up and rock if possible. I'd also give a bottle as soon as baby wakes, without delaying it. Early weaning is often a time that sees a temporary reappearance of a night feed, so the bottle might settle baby quicker.

Then I'd have the cot next to my bed and when baby wakes, use the "firm hand" way to reassure. A firm hand on baby's chest/back/side (whichever way they sleep) gives baby a constant reminder that you are there, in a very reassuring way. I don't mean leaning or pressing down on baby, but also not a gentle placed hand. Baby needs to be able to feel your reassurance even when eyes are closed.

So I would bend/lean into cot from my bed, firm hand on baby. Then if upset, lift and drop fingers to pay for reassurance. When calm and settled still hand so that it a just a firm, reassuring presence. Pat again if upset. Some people add in shushes, if needed.

The key is getting baby to sleep in the cot, not in your arms. At least if next to your bed, you can doze yourself as resetting baby. If in another room, you may be sitting next to the cot for a fair while.

Once baby accepts in-cot settling with a firm hand, start removing hand once calm, putting firm hand back only when/if upset. Then your hand becomes the settling tool, but the calming to sleep happens without your hand on the chest and with baby in he cot.

I would also recommend following the same principle at bedtime and nap times, for consustancy.

solomonrulesok Fri 14-Apr-17 20:09:50

Thanks - kind of knew it would be the case. Am so exhausted but need to think of the long term! May move travel cot into our room as no room in his room for a bed.

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