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How to get 9 month old to sleep

(2 Posts)
richmondone Sun 09-Apr-17 09:25:21


I'm wondering if anyone has any advice about getting a baby to sleep once they are down in their cot..? Apologies in advance for the long post.

To give a bit of context: baby won't sleep in car or pram or baby carrier (she's too nosy and interested in her surroundings, and if she does fall asleep it's for the minimum time).

At home, she naps twice a day, once about 2 hours after waking up for 1hr20 mins, once 3 hours after waking from that nap for the same amount of time. The issue is getting her to sleep so these timings in reality are all over the place.

About a month ago I stopped feeding her to sleep. We now follow a routine of change nappy, sleeping bag on, story, cuddle and song and put down in cot with music on and I will stay with her and stroke or pat her to sleep often with shushing. So basically still a lot of intervention from me. At night it's a similar routine but with a feed and bath added in.

When I put her down in her cot she acts like it's party time! I know she's tired but will start chatting, clapping, trying to get to the baby monitor, clawing at my hand, and then will alternate this behaviour with extremely intense hysterical crying. I can pick her up and rock her to settle her but the second I put her down if she's not fast asleep she wakes right up and he process starts again. Its taking over an hour for her to fall asleep for each nap and nighttime sleep by which time she's clearly shattered. If I leave the room she goes crazy. If I sit down next to her, she goes crazy. My back is in agony from spending 3 hours a day bent over the cot!

I must admit, I find this incredibly annoying and it's really hampering my enjoyment of my wonderful baby at the moment. I want to do something sustainable, this is not sustainable and nor is rocking or feeding her to sleep because I'm phasing out bf and also going back to work in 6 weeks.

Any help very gratefully received!!

FATEdestiny Mon 10-Apr-17 10:16:13

Could you try a funny to replace breastfeeding to sleep?

Or cosleeping?

Any other routes apart from cosleeping realky will involve lots of time investment from you and patience. So instead of resenting this, accept the need and see the bigger picture of your time and patience being for the greater good of baby's sleep.

So if you are going to do this, have a clear plan. If you are doing in-cot settling, do in cot settling all of the time. This means not gerting her to nearly asleep in your arms first.

If you are going to start rockibg to sleep and gradually reduce baby's dependence on it, then don't start off putting baby in the cot awake. Start rocking baby.

If you are going to do any gentle method which gives your reassurance (gradual withdrawal or pick up put down), don't try to leave the room until baby is fully asleep. Like never do this, it destroys the trust needed for these methods. If baby thinks you might leave, baby will fight to stay awake so you don't leave. If baby knows you'll never leave, there is no battle so going to sleep quicker.

This same principle works with any degree of separation. If baby needs you keanobg into the cot for reassurance, then baby needs to trust you'll stay leaning into the cot without withdrawing your attention. If baby feels she has to battle to jerp you there, she wont sleep and it ends uo taking ages.

Same if she needs you stood next to the cot or whatever. If baby is forever anxious that you will stop giving the reassurance needed, then she will not relax enough to sleep. Once she trusts, knows, that you'll not be going anywhere while she's conscious, then she can relax much more quickly and easily.

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