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Wakes once for 1-3hrs most nights

(9 Posts)
Commonname Mon 03-Apr-17 19:25:18

Hoping someone has the golden bullet for my 8 month old's sleep problem.
For the last few months she has woken most nights and screamed for between 1 and 3 hours. The waking is at different times usually between 12am and 3am. About twice a week she sleeps through without a peep - so she can do it.
She no longer feeds in the night. Can self settle and naps well ( c3 hrs over 2 or 3 naps ending no later than 5pm). Bedtime is between 7 and 7:30. Predictable routine before hand.
Any ideas​ as to what the problem is? It's the fact that she only wakes once that I find strange - surely most problems would lead to multiple night waking?

Sandsnake Mon 03-Apr-17 19:33:01

That sounds tough, I always think the long wakings are worse than the shorter more frequent ones. My only real suggestion is that 5pm is almost certainly too late to be waking up from a nap at 8 months. I would maybe bring your cut off forward to 4pm and see if that helps at all. It sounds like everything else is going really well for you so that's the only thing I can think of. Good luck! smile

MumUndone Mon 03-Apr-17 19:37:08

I agree with Snake - probably time to drop or shorten the 3rd nap.

Commonname Mon 03-Apr-17 19:41:30

Thanks, we're struggling to move from 3 to 2 naps and if she doesn't get the last one in that ends at 5pm her last nap would end at 2pm and there's no way she'll make it to 7pm from 2pm. The times we've tried she's fallen asleep at 5pm which is even worse!

Agree about the long wakings being worse DD1 was a frequent night waker due to feed to a sleep issue and I'm sure i wasn't as crackered as now (but I guess that's the difference between having 1 and 2!)

FATEdestiny Mon 03-Apr-17 20:45:03

You'll need to move the morning and afternoon naps later, to accommodate droppibg the teatime nap.

For example if she currently sleeps 9am, 1pm and 4pm, move the morning nap to start at 9.30 or 10am then push the afternoon nap to 2pm.

Also, when you say she self settles, what happens to get her from awake to asleep?

Commonname Mon 03-Apr-17 21:27:23

Thanks, sounds like I need to make more of an effort to get down to 2 naps. Her current nap schedule is roughly 8:45-10:30, 13:00-14:00 and 16:30-17:00. But tbh it varies day to day as sometimes she wakes earlier and can only do 2.5-3hrs before she gets cranky.
Her previous sleep routine is a bf then carried to cot or pram in a different room. At bedtime there's a story at this point. She rarely falls asleep on the boob. She often fidgets around (sometimes crying a little) for about 5 mins and then falls asleep. Sometimes she'll sit up and chatter before falling asleep.
Recently​ she has started to get more upset on occasion when I leave her in her cot and must admit I have then fed her again to calm her down. Sometimes to the point when she's probably a bit too sleepy. However, I she definitely rouses to the point that she knows she's going into her cot when I put her down again.

FATEdestiny Mon 03-Apr-17 22:35:28

Is it fair to say she has nothing to comfort herself with then?

No dummy or comforter? Does she has a self-comforting action? Stroking her cheek, sucking her thumb, twirling her hair etc?

I wonder if she'd benefit from the calm, contented "ahhh that's nice" feeling children get when they feel comforted?

I've read about babies who have no comfort, but in my decade of parenting my four children and all the other mums I have come across in that time... I have never come across a child who sleep a without any comfort.

That may be the problem in the middle of the night, that baby cannot feel comforted enough to go back to sleep.

Commonname Tue 04-Apr-17 06:34:18

Sorry should have mentioned that she does have a jellycat rabbit that she often plays with as she goes to sleep. We also see her seeking it again on the monitor during brief night wakings.
However, during the middle of the night time screamathons if you pass​ it to her she'll usually throw it away in anger. But she also often doesn't initially​ like being picked up or stroked/patted or shuussed during the long night waking. Only after a period of screaming will she be receptive to being comforted.

FATEdestiny Tue 04-Apr-17 08:50:20

Out of the cot, what are her fine motor skills like?

Pincer grip for picking up small things. Moving spoon from plate to mouth
Being able to turn things over (like if you handed her the wrong end of a spoon, would she turn it around)
The ability to place objects rather than just let go
Build blocks in a tower

They are just off the top of my head, I can't remember his age appropriate they are.

I mention this because 8 months is very young for meaningful bonding with a comforter. Various motor skills are needed to be able to use the comforter in a more meaningful way that just holding it to their face.

The comforter bond often starts at about this age, with the development of early fine motor skills. But it's usually not established until more like 12 months, depending on skill development rates.

So it may be a case of just waiting this out until a bit older.

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