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5 month will only nap on me...help'

15 replies

Bergs30 · 01/03/2017 16:35

Hi

Hoping someone can help this FTM. For the past 5 months I have let my little one nap on me and now it has come to the time I would like him to nap in his cot/pram ect. My DH doesn't see the baby Mon-Fri due to work and I have no family near by so it is just me. DH sleeps well at night (7-7 with 2/3 wake ups), we have always had a consistent routine for bed however during the day he will only sleep if on someone (usually me). On Friday I started to get him to nap in his cot using a mixture of sh/pat and PU/PD. Well today I have had 45 mins or crying for morning nap and then an hour of crying for afternoon nap. He only sleeps for a max of 30 mins when in cot so it just seems like there is no point but at some point he will go to nursery so will need to be able to sleep himself. I don't know if it is supposed to be this hard to do these techniques - he gets really upset and will cry as soon as I put him down. After he woke up from afternoon nap, I tried to get him back down but he just kept getting into a state so I gave up. He has been sleeping on me for the last 2 hours now. I am EBF, he rejected a dummy and won't take a bottle. Any help/tips would be greatly appreciated? I am scared of causing stress to my LO that needn't be caused. Thanks!

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FATEdestiny · 01/03/2017 19:20

How about napping in something that moves? Pram, pushchair, bouncy chair.

I would also retry the dummy. Dummies are amazing for independant sleep.

How about cosleeping for naps?

I wouldn't be letting baby cry for anywhere close to those amounts of times. Personally I wouldn't have any crying (dummy stops that), but I know other people who are ok with 5 minutes or so of crying. The lengths of time crying you describe seem a bit... much.

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Carta60 · 01/03/2017 19:47

Agree with fate who has helped me a lot with my need for help. My little girl was the same. Just starting to nap in her cot at 8 months but I think this is because she is on the move more and is developmentally more ready. I accepted naps on me got a good sling so I could do stuff and caught up on tv. My dd still naps better on me though or when on the move. if I'm tired we sleep on the bed together. Time will improve things in my (little) experience x

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Coconut0il · 01/03/2017 20:43

Do you mind him napping on you? Do you want to stop for yourself or just because he'll be going to nursery?
DS2, 17 months has always napped on me if I'm there. He would sleep in a bouncy chair when he was smaller, if I kept bouncing it with my foot and he sleeps in the pushchair for DP. He pushes him back and forth in the house till he drops off.
He only has one nap a day now and it's normally when I'm at work Sad I love Saturday and Sunday so we can have a lap nap Smile
He will sleep differently at nursery regardless of his routine with you so don't worry about that.

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Beansprout30 · 01/03/2017 21:16

I was worrying about this and was stressing out that dd wouldn't sleep anywhere but me, but now at 7 months she will rarely fall asleep on me and prefers to be in her cot and will sometimes go 2 hours which I never thought I'd see the day! We did invest in a sleepyhead which has probably helped loads but I also think as mentioned above, it's something which comes with age

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Bergs30 · 02/03/2017 06:37

Thanks for your replies.

FATE: he will nap in his pram and baby carrier but as soon as I stop he wakes up. Which is ok, happy to keep moving but he also struggles to sleep for that long and I don't want him to not be getting enough sleep. Also, just to be clear it was not consistent cries for naps, I would comfort then put down but the whole process took 45mins/1 hour and there was a lot of crying.

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Bergs30 · 02/03/2017 06:41

Coconutoil: I don't mind him napping on me at all, just occasionally would like the option of him going down in his cot or somewhere so I can get on when. Also, I have had so many comments that it makes me feel guilty for doing it. Perhaps I could try co-sleeping for naps, never done it before really so not sure he would like it but worth a try. Then I could slowly retreat. Will do some research into how that is safe if i retreat and leave him in bed.

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Bergs30 · 02/03/2017 06:42

Beansprout30: was it a sleepyhead grand? Did you use at all before? Really is it worth it?

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Beansprout30 · 02/03/2017 07:02

Yes sleepyhead grand, she had the deluxe from birth then when she grew out of it she struggled with sleep. For us it was 100% worth it but they are a lot of money

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Beansprout30 · 02/03/2017 07:02

Btw, do what is right for you and baby and don't listen to other people's comments

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CoffeeAndOranges · 02/03/2017 07:26

Bergs my baby was very similar at that age - thanks to reflux he was always very uncomfortable sleeping lying down so got used to napping in the sling and pram etc. I couldn't sit down when I had him in the sling or he would wake up, so had to walk around swaying or balance on the arm of the sofa. 'Sleep when the baby sleeps' my arse! We were still up 4-5 times a night with him too. I would sometimes put him in his sidecar sleeper for a nap but only usually got 20 mins or so, not enough time to do anything really.

As he got older I just gradually began putting him down more and more (I bf so have always fed to sleep for cot naps) and the length of naps gradually increased. He began to nap better once he was crawling (more tired) and I think weaning helped (we waited til 6 months).

He is now 15 months and will nap for up to 2 hours in his cot. I still feed to sleep for cot naps but nursery can get him to sleep by just stroking his hair, rubbing his tummy etc. They are magicians!

I have no advice for techniques to get him to go to sleep but regarding the length of naps, hang in there, it really will improve.

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Bergs30 · 02/03/2017 07:44

Beansprout: I have never used it and he sleeps in his cot so don't think I will introduce now. Getting one from the start for next baby though! Thanks!

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Bergs30 · 02/03/2017 07:45

Coffeeandoranges- thanks! You give me hope.

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teaandbiscuitsforme · 02/03/2017 12:13

Re co-sleeping for naps - If it suits you, it's worth giving it a go.

I co-slept with DD and now with DS but for some naps with DD, I would feed lying down in our bed, wait until she was asleep and then sneak away leaving a video monitor on. Obviously it's not for everybody but it worked for us.

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Heirhelp · 02/03/2017 12:43

My DD was like this but she would nap on DH. Only now at 9 months can I push her to sleep and then leave her pram in the locked garden next to the patio doors.

DD is a cosleeper,

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FartnissEverbeans · 02/03/2017 13:53

I used to worry about this too. Our situations are similar - my DS sleeps well at night but will only properly nap on me during the day. I can slide him gently into his cot but he soon wakes up.

Sometimes I put him in his pram and take him for a walk. That works well but he tends to wake up soon after we stop moving. In the end I've decided that I love cuddling him, so bugger it, he's only little once and if he wants to nap on me then why not?! I just enjoy it and take the time to mess about on Mumsnet! He's napping on me right now and it's lovely.

He's just started nursery and I can reassure you that he does sleep there, I've seen him do it. I can only imagine that the nursery nurses are better at putting babies to sleep than me! Plus nursery absolutely exhausts him. His nursery naps seem to be short but they've been enough for him so far.

I did buy a Sleepyhead, and he naps better in that than in his cot. I like it a lot actually, it's been worth the price.

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