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No sleep and intense separation anxiety!!!!

(9 Posts)
Allierose Mon 30-Jan-17 21:32:34

Where do I begin it's all a mess, My DS is now nine months and for the last two to three months he's been waking every 1/2-1 hour, we have been co sleeping with him from around four months as this was the only way we would get a solid two three hour block but this has now changed!

He also has a major separation issues, I can't leave him with anyone not even my DH! He's a little more relaxed during the day but still very anxious.
I'm still breast feeding him and he will occasionally take a bottle but it's all getting a little too much I havent slept a solid two hours in I don't know how long! He was a perfect sleeper until around 3/4 months, and now I'm crying because i just don't know what to do!
We've tried contollled crying and this was painful he was sick it was horrid, we done pick up put down we've done it all! Is there anyone who can help!
Does the sleep have something to do with the separation?

FATEdestiny Mon 30-Jan-17 22:08:12

What is baby's daytime sleep like?

And how is weaning going?

Light sleeping (ie waking frequently) are usually down to over tiredness and/or general lack of calories. In both these it is a cumulative effect over 24 hours, over several days.

GenevaJoey Tue 31-Jan-17 06:20:57

I don't know if it's at all applicable, as my 7 month old doesn't really have separation anxiety, but I find she wakes much more frequently at night when we co-sleep or share a room, like you every hour or so. Since I put her on her own room after Xmas, she has 3 to 4 hour stretches, or wakes briefly and self settles. Could you try her in her room for a few nights? It's made a massive difference to me. (Of course it's harder to get out of bed and comfort her, but overall we both sleep better)

Allierose Tue 31-Jan-17 09:16:58

So he eats three solid meals with snacks inberween, his naps in the day are consistent but vary in length a normal day is wakes at 8 has breakfast play or outing a nap around 11 wakes has lunch plays or outing naps again at 3 bedtime is 8-8:30.
I'm currently feeding him to sleep but wakes as soon as I try to put him down in his cot! I'm willing to get up to comfort him it's just really hard even getting him in that room! @genevajoy How did you get your little one to sleep in the room?

FATEdestiny Tue 31-Jan-17 18:35:44

Could you try a dummy? It's very late to introduce, but dumnies are unrivalled as an independant soothing mechanism.

Beansprout30 Tue 31-Jan-17 21:02:04

My lg is 6 months and we had two months of awful night times. The only way she would sleep was next to me breast feeding to sleep.

I couldn't cope with that long term so bought a sleepyhead grand and it has improved her sleep massively. She went in her own room within a week with no crying. She still wakes but has a quick feed then happy to go back down.

I started with the sleepyhead next to me in bed and made sure she went back in it straight after a feed. Then moved the sleepyhead to her cot in her own room after two nights and started a consistent, short bedtime routine - pjs, then downstairs for a good feed, then up to bed for story and would sit with her until she went off to sleep ssshing, belly rubbing etc. After a week I was able to read story, kiss, lights out and leave the room with her wide awake and she would be asleep without a moan in five mins.

She's now sleeping for 3-4 hour stretches, no crying when put down and sometimes I hear her stir over the monitor but she goes back to sleep by herself as long as she's not hungry

I think for us the most important thing has been feeding downstairs at bedtime instead of in bedroom and giving her the chance to drop off on her own - with the help of the sleepyhead for comfort and her slumber buddy for soothing music. Have also figured out just the amount of sleep she needs in the day for a successful night

Allierose Tue 31-Jan-17 22:19:05

@FATEdestiny we've tried the dummy he wasn't interested but always worth trying again!
@beansprot30 we used the first sleepyhead and it worked wonders however he got too big so we had to get rid, will defiantly try your way and see if it works! Feeding somewhere else makes sense as they loose the connection of the two. Thank you all for your support and ideas I'll give it a try!

Beansprout30 Wed 01-Feb-17 02:19:46

We used the small one too and took it away in the middle of her four month regression, which was a bad idea! Good luck, hope you are able to make progress

Beansprout30 Wed 01-Feb-17 02:20:04

We used the small one too and took it away in the middle of her four month regression, which was a bad idea! Good luck, hope you are able to make progress

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