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6 month old doesn't want to sleep!

(25 Posts)
user1471449434 Fri 27-Jan-17 02:16:09

Please help, I don't know how much more I can take. My 6 month old DS has never been a great sleeper. But for the last 2 months he's been terrible. He wakes so many times during the night I've lost count. Sometimes it can be hourly, sometimes 2 hourly, sometimes after 20 mins, and sometimes like tonight it's as soon as I put him back down in his bed (we have a Chicco next2me) the only thing that gets him back to sleep is feeding (he's EBF) I've tried shushing & stroking him, rocking him & he has a dummy but he won't get back to sleep unless on the boob. His daytime naps are crap, he's so inconsistent as sometimes I can feed him to sleep but only if we're lying down, other times he'll only go to sleep in the car or pram, & 9/10 times he only sleeps for 30 mins. I'd say on average he only has 2 naps for approx. 30 mins a day, so he's definitely overtired! The only time we get better sleeps is if we cosleep (tried with the side of the next2me down but he still wouldn't sleep unless he was in my bed!) The problem with this is my husband, we have no spare room, my DS room is tiny so no space for a mattress in there, same with the living room, it's full of all his toys & the couch isn't big enough to sleep on. So my husband would have nowhere to sleep. I've tried with all 3 of us in our bed but again it's just not big enough, I end up so uncomfortable that I don't sleep anyways. I don't know what to do! I feel like I've tried it all & nothing works.

Youhaveupdates1 Fri 27-Jan-17 08:50:19

I too am currently on my knees with exhaustion. My ds is 5.5 months and went from bad sleeping to really shit the last two nights, I couldnt even tell you how often he woke up as it was so frequent and I'm so tired I just can't remember! Like you I will get back to bed and he will start and as he is in with my ds1 I have to go and get him otherwise he won't sleep well. I won't co sleep as it's not for us plus we only managed to get ds1 sleeping on his on when r was 2.3 years so not keen on that. He won't take a full bottle (currently 5oz) and is just fussy! They say there is a developmental leap at 6 months wimhich effects their sleep but he has never slept well, never!!
I can't offer you any advice but just some solidarity really. Sorry I know that doesn't help at all flowers and brew

FATEdestiny Fri 27-Jan-17 10:34:29

my DS room is tiny so no space for a mattress in there

What are you going to do when your son is too old for a cot and needs a bed?

Can you take furniture out of his room to fit a bed in there?

user1471449434 Fri 27-Jan-17 11:43:37

Youhaveupdates1 it's awful isn't it. Especially when he was a newborn & everyone would say "oh it'll get better" LIARS! grin

FATEdestiny his cot bed is in his room which we're hoping will last him until he's about 3 (once he actually gets in it!) by which point we should have moved to a bigger house or extended the one we're in. I meant there's no space for an extra mattress that my DH could sleep on.

He ended up in our bed & slept better but of course I was so uncomfy as there wasn't much space for us all so I didn't get much sleep. Thankfully my DH is off today so he took DS to his mums for a couple of hours while I slept.

Had a chat with DH & he's very kindly said he'll sleep on the floor between our bed & the wardrobe! Again not enough space for a mattress but enough for a person to sleep in, so now we just have to see about making that as comfy as possible for him. I did tell him we should maybe get a king size bed so all 3 of us could sleep in the bed, the divan ones look like they won't take up much more space than our current bedframe. So we'll see how this goes for the next few nights.

FATEdestiny Fri 27-Jan-17 12:22:10

So I'd either get a superkingsized bed (go the whole hog - if you're getting a big bed, get a big bed and get the super king sized)

Or - if you have a cotbed, they make perfect sidecar cosleeper. A cot bed will be perfectly stable if you remove one side and wedge the 3-sided cot up to your bed.

You can then cuddle right into the cot - your whole top half of the body c
an be encircling baby, soothing to sleep, if needed. Then extract yourself into your own space when settled.

That way either DH can stay in bed. Or buy a single mattress (buy a decent one, he might as well be comfy and it can be used on DSs big boy bed on a few years time anyway) for DH to sleep on in DSs room.

Writerwannabe83 Fri 27-Jan-17 13:07:50

I will PM you OP smile

Youhaveupdates1 Fri 27-Jan-17 19:18:24

Yes I am sure they mean well but grrrr! grin
Glad you managed some sleep whilst your dh took him out, fingers crossed you will get sleep tonight too. Your DH sounds great giving up his space in bed to sleep on the floor. We have a super King bed but it still doesn't feel big enough when trying to sleep with a baby!
My mum is having my ds2 over night tomorrow thankfully so I can at least get some rest as I'm now coming down with a cold sad

user1471449434 Sat 28-Jan-17 10:11:22

Well DS slept in the bed with me & although we still had a few wake ups it was a lot easier to feed lying down & go straight back to sleep after, even if it was just for an hour! Normally by the time he's finished feeding I'm wide awake.

I've mentioned the super king size bed to DH, he said he'll see how he gets on on the floor but I'm hopeful he'll soon change his mind as I'd love a new bed anyways! I'd have to rearrange some furniture but I think I could cope with that to have a nice big comfy bed!
Started weaning DS on Sunday & a few people have said that once their babies were on 3 meals a day they slept better, not gonna get my hopes up but maybe it might reduce the amount of times he wakes up, even getting 3 hours solid sleep would be fine!

Youhaveupdates1 Sat 28-Jan-17 20:49:46

I'm pleased it's working well for you smile getting out of bed to feed is hard work, it's good that co sleeping works better for you as even a little bit of sleep makes a difference
People told me once my ds1 was on solids he would sleep well but he didn't lol but that's not to say your ds won't as they are all different.
I have tried my ds2 on some solids but he still pushes it all out with his tongue so going to give him some more time.
Good luck with convincing dh for super King - it was the best decision we ever made I absolutely love my bed and the space we have! Only trouble is when we go away we have to get used to smaller beds which is really difficult grin
I had a better night with ds2 last night but maybe he was exhausted from the last few night of hell. He napped for 2.5 hours today with my mum shock he never naps anywhere near that well for me!? He will probably sleep through the night hmm
Hope you have a good night tonight

My boy from 4 months had so many growth spurts he slept appallingly and was bf so much more. His sleeping settled once weaned. He'll get there. I also did a bit of co sleeping and feeding to cope at that stage.

I can still remember how crippling the lack of sleep was.

He's a strapping 8 year old now and still eats like there's no tomorrow wink

user1471449434 Sun 29-Jan-17 17:13:44

Youhaveupdates1 they always behave for other people don't they?! And then they think you're exaggerating!

Dontstep it's these examples that give me hope, & I think that's what I need right now!

He slept for 5.5 hours last night! Wouldn't go down so I got fed up & sent him back downstairs with DH, where he watched a bit of sky sports news then fell asleep on his mat! Thought he would wake when I lifted him for bed but he just went back to sleep once I popped his dummy in. We'll see what tonight brings!

Youhaveupdates1 Sun 29-Jan-17 20:53:49

5.5 hours is amazing I bet you feel better for it too! Fingers crossed for tonight, with any luck his sleep will get a little better again smile
I noticed two little teeth under his gums so maybe that's why his sleep is so bad!?

Oh yes both of mine teethed early. I went through a lot of calpol, bonjela teething gel and those homeopathic teetha sachets.

5.5 hrs is really good.

Youhaveupdates1 Mon 30-Jan-17 08:33:39

I was thinking of trying an Amber necklace if things got very bad with teething, I didn't use one with ds1 but I barely noticed his teeth coming through but I have a feeling ds2 is a little more sensitive grin
I have the granules and calpol plus some dentinox but not sure how effective that will be as ds2 mouth is always so wet so not sure the gel will stick or help!?

Hope you had another good night user?

Ours was better he woke at 9:50, 1:50, 5:00, 6:22 then 7:36 so all in all much better than being up and down every twenty mins smile

user1471449434 Mon 30-Jan-17 19:34:54

Youhaveupdates1 your night sounds similar to mine last night! Not as good as my 5.5 hours the night before, knew it was too good to be true. I too have noticed teeth coming through so have been putting the bonjela on today, although I don't know if that really makes a difference either. Whenever I've used it for ulcers it just seems to sting initially then not do too much! I've thought about the Amber bracelets/necklaces, I can't say I believe they work but I know a couple of people who said they were sceptical as well at first but then changed their minds when they saw a difference.

The cosleeping is helping, although I did notice last night that DS stirred each time I tried to change position! So I'm aware it's going to have to be a short term solution until we get something else sorted, especially as DH is still sleeping on a pile of blankets on the floor! He says he's sleeping fine so I don't feel too bad grin

Youhaveupdates1 Mon 30-Jan-17 21:01:31

Every night is so different isn't it! I know from ds1 that I will get comfortable with a good nights sleep as until they are older it can change in a heart beat, beat you can do is just enjoy whatever good sleep you get - one night at a time!

I'm dreading tonight as ds has already woken twice for his dummy and I don't know about you but when he is this unsettled early eve I'm in for a long night shock

Have you tried the granules too? I use them as well as calpol although I think ibuprofen is better for teething.
Hmm I did a little reading about the amber necklace and I'm not sure now, I was worried about him wearing something around his neck anyway but there doesn't seem to be evidence of how it works! There are creams for sale which are supposed to help when rubbed into the cheek, I saw them when I was looking for the necklaces etc so if I get desperate I may have to order some.

Your dh sounds lovely...how many blankets is he sleeping on for it to be comfy grin he sounds very supportive. Hopefully it won't be too long before you can go back to normal.
How long do you feel you will co sleep for?
I brought ds in with me at 6:22 which is when he slept for an hour but I couldn't sleep so I definitely couldn't do all night and like you I was scared to move in fear of waking him up as he seems quite a light sleeper!

Youhaveupdates1 Mon 30-Jan-17 21:06:56

*wont get comfortable
*best you can do

Sorry on mobile with one hand and cuppa in the other

PinkyOrTank Mon 30-Jan-17 21:17:55

If you think it may be teething, try Teetha granules - it's like crack for babies grin Always helped my DD sleep a bit better when teething. Good luck for tonight!

user1471449434 Mon 30-Jan-17 21:53:46

Oh I know, you just KNOW when you're in for a tough night!
Not tried the granules. Might need to try these Teetha "crack" granules grin Have you tried any?
DH is on a throw, plus a thick duvet folded over, I look at it as if I'm having to wake up through the night the least he can do is sleep slightly rough wink
I honestly don't know how long we'll cosleep, I just know that I'm not dreading the nights now so I don't want to mix anything up! I think I still have this hope that DS will just magically start sleeping longer on his own soon but I know that the chances of that are slim so I may have to try other methods sooner rather than later. I think DS is also a light sleeper, much to my mum's dismay! Whenever/if he naps at her house she says "he needs to learn to sleep through the noise!" as she clatters about while I'm desperately shushing her!

Fingers crossed our DSs are kind to us tonight!

Youhaveupdates1 Tue 31-Jan-17 08:27:18

Yes I have the granules and I think they are pretty good, I used them yesterday but it's not that obvious if jibe is teething other than I can see his teeth - his cheeks aren't red and he has dribbled and had his hand in his mouth since birth so it's hard to tell grin I'm using them just in case as they are very close to surface so it must be a little sore!!
Very true regarding your dh, I bet he stilll gets a better quality sleep than you do.

To be honest, if co sleeping is working for you and you aren't dreading night times anymore then just roll with it until it no longer works. My night wasn't too bad actually lol I'm surprised! He woke at 10:10, 1:16, 4, 5:30(very briefly had to top him up and poo dummy in) then up at 7:20 ish so not as bad as I was expecting which is always a good thing!

I know what you mean about your mum, mine is the same. Although irritatingly when he is there he sleeps longer despite the noise she makes or my dad (he has a loud voice) and yet here if I even run the tap he is awake confused when I am there im constantly asking them to be quiet - they get very annoyed with me lol!

How was your night?

Youhaveupdates1 Tue 31-Jan-17 09:43:33

I've just seen a white noise toy designed to help aid sleep called MyHummy, have you heard of it? It's expensive but seems to have very good reviews. We have a Ewan the dream sheep but it only plays sound for twenty mins whereas MyHummy can work for twelve hours but it also responds to babies movements and starts playing white noise to help them go back to sleep! Maybe worth a thought?? I don't know whether you have tried white noise?

user1471449434 Tue 31-Jan-17 20:04:50

Your DS could be my DS's twin! He's always had his fists in his mouth & drooled & never had red cheeks, so it's never been obvious that he's teething.

Last night was OK, he woke for a feed every 3 hours, in between that I just had to put the dummy in a couple of times, then he was awake just after 6am for the day. Had a lazy day so didn't feel too bad! Can't imagine how you do it with another DS running about!

Never heard of MyHummy, but I've sometimes used an app on my phone for white noise since he was born, but I always have the fan on in the room at night anyways because I can't sleep without the noise! Before DS was born we used it to cool the room down because it was always roasting (I don't like the windows being open in case bugs get in blush), then I got so used to having it on that even through the winter months it was on but pointed away so I wasn't cold grin total waste of electricity I know but it helps me sleep! I had thought about getting one of those light projectors to kind of distract him & hopefully send him off to sleep but I haven't seen one that I like, I wanted one that either changed colours or moved. I'll see one that I like then read a bad review & get put off. Just don't want to waste money on novelty things, but then I suppose I won't know if they work until I try them!

Have you got over your cold? I had it last week as well, it's so much worse when you can't rest properly.

What's your bedtime routine like? I've tried to stick to the same one of In the Night Garden on at 6pm, 6.30 either bath (3 x a week) or face wash, jammies & sleeping bag on, then feed (& pray he falls asleep!) This worked for so long, he used to go down really easily, would even wake up sometimes when put in his bed but would fall asleep again. But now it's pot luck & I can still be battling with him at 8.30/9pm. I knew this boy would be trouble!

Youhaveupdates1 Tue 31-Jan-17 20:24:44

They are very similar, I noticed it in our original post so I had to respond! They say everyone has a double grin
Feeding every three hours is a good start as he masters the art of putting his dummy back in you hopefully won't be woken up! Fingers crossed anyway! Lazy days are great and definitely needed. I have been lucky that every time I have had a particularly bad few nights my mum offers to take him overnight as he is bottles fed but it is definitely hard with a toddler too. Ds1 is at a challenging age and to be fair to him he is really well behaved,most of the time. I'm just exhausted and when he is here I have to be running around after him so I relish the days his childminder has him - which sounds awful but these early months are draining!

The fan makes good white noise I guess which is why it helps you smile the noise of it would make me feel cold lol
I had also thought about a projector but I wanted white stars and could not find coloured ones grin or ones with bears (I think) without seeing how it works for real I haven't made my mind up and actually purchased one lol. His loves his Ewan and the noise definately helps so I might have a think about MyHummy as it's continueous and I like that the volume can be altered as some babies need it quiet and some really loud!

Cold is still lingering but I got away lightly to be fair as I didn't feel too bad!

Bedtime routine, hmm well he is always in bed by 7 as he is ready by then and I usually get him ready after 6 but I don't follow a strict routine. Sometimes he will have a bath on his own or sometimes with ds1 but not every night, then dressed into baby grow and sleeping bag, into front room for a while and milk if he wants it. He has to have preventative anti biotics every night so I usually do this and then give any teething bits and calpol, try milk again and then he usually lets me know that he is ready so he gets kisses from ds1 and DP and I take him, pop in cot, pop dummy in cover with blanket and turn on Ewan and turn light off - sometimes I have to go in a few times to pop dummy in or offer milk but tonight he just went off, phew!! I don't feed to sleep, I did with ds1 and it became difficult so I have always tried to feed when he wakes during the day (not always possible) so I feed then put him down awake and I let him go off on his own.

how are his naps during the day?

Youhaveupdates1 Tue 31-Jan-17 20:25:45

*could only find coloured ones and ones with bears

Youhaveupdates1 Tue 31-Jan-17 20:33:28

When your battling with him at night, is he crying or playing? It's so frustrating when they change their routine sad

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