Is it normal(29 Posts)
Please don't judge as I've had a few judgy people on here
My son is 15months and he doesn't sleep through the night, don't get me wrong he loves bedtime as he has his favourite blankets and his favourite mickey mouse film.. I say to him bedtime and he scarpers to the door to go to bed.
But he doesn't sleep through he will wake up anywhere from 1-5 times. I don't know where I'm going wrong and to me he has a pretty good routine
Why is he waking? How do you respond when he wakes?
What is his routine? day and bedtime
Both mine were still waking in the night at 15 months. It's normal, they're still babies!
His routine is
He wakes up usually around 7-7.30 am
He has his breakfast
Then we play\ read his books and listen to nursery rhymes until he's ready for a nap
He goes for a nap usually a hour
Then when he wakes he has dinner and again we play read books and listen to nursery rhymes until its time for tea which is always a set time at 4.30pm
After his tea he has a bath ( which he knows after tea its bath time and stands at the door shouting bath)
Then when he's had his bath he gets ready for bed and plays until 6.30-7pm which is bedtime..
He goes upstairs with a bottle of milk into his cot with his mickey mouse DVD on as he won't sleep without it
And I don't know why he wakes. But when he does I go into him and he says botbot which is his bottle
So I go do him a bottle give him a kiss and cuddle tell him I love him and I put his DVD back on and lay him down
Do you go out and tire him out at all? My 18 month old, for example has been for a walk and a swim this morning. We go for a walk with the dog every day and I'm a firm believer that fresh air is tiring!
And do you feed him/cuddle him etc when he wakes up or just sooth him back to sleep?
We do go out but that's just just a rough routine for when the weather is rubbish as he hates his rain cover... When I've done his bottle he gets cuddles a kiss and I tell him I love him and put him back down
Maybe he is genuinely hungry? Can you try and give him a bit more tea and more milk before bed? It's an easy thing to try. If it doesn't work, at least you can eliminate it as a reason. Are you weaning him off boob/bottle at the mo? Or unfortunately, he may just be a child that wakes. I know it gets some flack here, but I tried Gina Ford and it worked wonders. I would wake my lg before I went to bed and give her some milk, she would then sleep through. It's unusual for her to wake now at 21 months. If she does it's normally teething or just a general wake up, just like we do. She soon settles back down. I would def try feeding him a bit more first and see if it helps though.
Is he eating well and drinking in the day? If so then you could probably do with cutting out the night time milk when he asks for it - he is using it as a means of getting to sleep so when he stirs he doesn't know any other way to go back to sleep other than with the bottle.
You also need to get rid of the bottle in his cot. Give it to him after his bath, clean his teeth then put him into bed awake.
If he's falling asleep with Mickey Mouse on, he's probably waking wondering where it's gone when he passes into lighter sleep. Can you try working on getting him to fall asleep without it?
(Mind you, mine still wakes in the night at nearly 3. Sometimes they just do...)
I think you need to move the bedtime routine around a bit. So bath, pjs, milk in the lounge then upstairs to brush his teeth then gro bag, book and bed. I'm not that fussed about the DVD but it could be replaced with a sound and light show that stays on all night so he won't miss it when he wakes up.
At nighttime, don't give him another bottle as it will rot his teeth and he doesn't need it. After a few nights of not getting fed, I suspect he will stop waking up.
He doesn't drink formula he drinks cows milk and brushes his teeth twice a day he loves to brush his teeth he won't go back to sleep unless he has a bottle of milk I've tried
Cows milk will still rot his teeth. Feeding at night and to go to sleep is a quick fix but not looking at the long term. He doesn't need night feeds at his age.
To get him to settle without milk you could do the disappearing chair
At his age you could just drop the bottle altogether- i think they recommend 12 months
I'm.not one to give sleep advice as ds nearly 18 months has been difficult sleeper all along. But, he now goes to sleep and provably 8/10 nights 'sleeps through' BUT he gets up very early. As in 4.30-5 early. No wake ups before that though and often asleep between 6.30-7.
He does sleep better when he's been very active. You say he doesn't like his rain cover so I assume you mean pram, is he walking? Ds is like a dog, needs exercising twice a day. So today he's had a walk round sainsbury (exciting I know......) and about an hour outside this afternoon, in his wellies and waterproofs. We are quite rural so can walk up and sown the road puddle jumping, and round the garden. I do use reins, and couldn't be without the waterproofs as he has a tendency to roll on the floor.
I'm not sure the dvd before bed is setting him up for the best nights sleep.
I'd hazard a guess that he's waking up because he's hungry. If he's having dinner at 4:30 and then a bottle at bed that's quite a big gap and the bottle won't be as filling as food. Try a snack before bed, a banana, porridge / ready brek or toast to fill him up.
My dd woke still woke up at that age. I really don't think this is unusual.
Cow's milk is just as bad for the teeth as an overnight drink. He might not like it if you don't give him a bottle but after a couple of nights he will forget all about it. Try and offer him a sippy cup of water when he wakes. If this is all you keep offering he'll soon stop waking.
If you're not prepared to drop the night milk then you'll probably we waiting a while for a sleep through I'm afraid
It is normal for children that age to wake, that's not to say you can't change a few things to improve chances of him sleeping through.
I'd ditch the bottle and the DVD during the night. He needs to be in exactly the same situation when he wakes during the night as when he went to sleep. So I'd do DVD and bottle in the living room, then brush his teeth. Then read a couple of books in his room, cuddle, into cot. I'd sit with him until he drops off to sleep, which will probably be met with protest the first nights, but he will learn to accept the change in his routine sooner ner than you think . I wouldn't give him a bottle during the night, just reassurance and your presence until he goes back to sleep. Once he's fine with that, I'd leave the room while he's still awake and let him go to sleep on his own.
Night wakings are normal until the age of two (and over!) but...falling asleep on a bottle is really no good for his teeth at his age, and night milk feeds really shouldn't be needed anymore. As it's the only way he knows how to fall asleep, it's the only way he knows how to get back to sleep in the night.
He may brush his teeth twice a day, but that's fairly pointless if he's going to sleep with milk pooling in his mouth, then getting more milk washing over his teeth in the night.
I'm definitely one for getting rid of bottles at 12 months so I'd say offer milk in a sippy cup downstairs, then do your bath routine including teeth. Then sit with him while he falls asleep. This will involve a shit-tonne of screaming for the first few nights, but STAY with him, and you'll know he's just shouting his frustration at you for not having his bottle, not screaming because he doesn't know where you are or whether you're coming back. Proceed with standard gradual withdrawal from there.
Also - his nap is a little too early, I'd say. Give him lunch at 11/11:30 then aim for a nap afterwards from 12 noon, not the other way round as you've been doing it. Nurseries tend to follow a pattern of an earlier lunch for this reason as a 15mo's afternoon sleep cycle starts around 12.
Wow - how did I miss the part about the DVD?
Yes - definitely no DVD. Absolutely no screens at least an hour before bed. They stimulate neural pathways and make it difficult to both go to sleep and stay asleep. This applies to adults and children.
Well unfortunately the DVD is the only way he will sleep I've tried it without and a week later still protesting so back to dvd
In the kindest way possible OP, you've asked where you could be going wrong and most have said
- bottle in the cot
- bottle at night
Have you tried gradual withdrawal? Controlled crying?
Sorry, OP. There is no magic wand.
You're either going to have to grit your teeth through getting rid of the bottle AND the DVD or grin and bear the night wakings as they stand. Screens are detrimental to sleep, especially before bedtime.
Sleeping through every single night is by no means guaranteed if you get rid of the bottle and the DVD, but they're two very obvious sleep aids he currently uses which are barring his way to more independent sleep.
There will be screaming, maybe even for a week. But sometimes you just have to grit your teeth and be tough. This won't be the only time you will have to deny your screaming kid something, parents have to do so on a regular basis!
Speaking from experience, the earlier you work on this problem, the easier it will be.
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