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breastfeeding and sleep

(6 Posts)
user1483564830 Wed 04-Jan-17 21:42:24

Hi everyone I have 4 children oldest son 15 and other 8 both bottle feed from 3 weeks old I also have son age 3 1/2 and daughter age 1 who I have completely breastfed from birth no expressing . my 3year old son has turned me in to his dummy he wakes every 3-4 hours for me i haven't slept more than four hours in four years and lately feel like im cracking up I put him in his own bed but he just jumps in mine feeds then if I have put him back in to his so sometimes i wake up hanging off the edge of his toddler bed my one year old is not as bad she will sleep for8 hours alot of the time and if she ends up in my bed I can just rub her back and she will drift off what is annoying me more than anything is that my older two were one when they slept through and that stresses me out as breast is beast but I feel like im failing as I'm starting to get really stressed with all the night waking

FATEdestiny Wed 04-Jan-17 21:59:31

How do you feel about stopping breastfeeding?

mineofuselessinformation Wed 04-Jan-17 22:07:23

Both of your children still breastfeeding are old enough to no longer be breastfed if you decide you want to stop.
That choice of course is yours.
It may be difficult at first, and you may need to enlist the help of someone else to settle and soothe them if that is what you choose.
I'm sorry you're feeling so worn down.

KittyConCarne Wed 04-Jan-17 22:24:17

Breast is best, but a happy & healthy mum is even better!
You've done amazingly well to bf not just 1, but 2 babies for pretty much the past 3.5 years- I think you should be really proud of yourself as that's quite an achievement!

However, at the age of 3.5, your DS no longer needs the nourishment of night-time feeds- it seems he is waking for comfort feeding/ being close to you during the night?

If you want to stop night- feeds, then there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, and you shouldn't ever feel as though you're failing by not having him sleeping through the night, as it sounds as though you're a lovely Mum who's put her babies comfort & contentment first for a very long time.

At his age, can you try explaining to him that from now on you'll have a nice bedtime story & last bf of the day (in his room or yours- whichever fits better), and then no more bf til morning- you could try a sticker reward chart for sleeping in his bed all night/ or stickers for gradually decreasing the amount of times he comes in to your room for a bf/ loads of praise in the morning for staying in his bed. Perhaps a new soft comforter toy that he can have in his bed to hold & stroke while you do story/ last bf, so he has something else to associate the comfort feelings with during the rest of the night in his own bed?

Feel for you- it must be hard to help him break the habit, and it may take time to get him consistently sleeping through. But it's far more important for you as a mum of 4 to be rested/ happy/ unstressed- you've done brilliantly so don't ever feel down on yourself! flowersbrew

user1483564830 Wed 04-Jan-17 22:27:02

I do want to stop but I dont want him to scream the house down and that is what he is doing when I say no I've slowly managed to almost most days stop him feeding during the day but night time is another matter he will pull and tug and scream till he gets it he's also half asleep as he's doing it then we feel so awful I give in I cant help it

user1483564830 Wed 04-Jan-17 22:39:59

Thanks I've just got him a new quilt and pillow and he started liking his sisters glow worm I think I panic as I dont want him to wake her and we are all in the same room together his older brothers share the other bedroom so can't really move him any where my hubby has tried as well but he can scream for hours or he will play for hours then scream after it is only my breast he is after I will try stickers it could work its about the only thing thing I haven't tried that's not traumatic thank you x

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