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Advice needed please....

(3 Posts)
Honeybee5887 Mon 02-Jan-17 19:53:43

I have a 15.5 month old DD, she has never slept through and I've tried all sorts of different sleep training methods. She got pretty good at her bedtime routine (bath, massage, story, bed) and would fall asleep in her cot if I sat next to it. I was trying to do the gradual retreat thing using a blanket over my hand as she'd got used to holding my hand to fall asleep. This was going well and she was just starting to hold the blanket instead of my hand. Now suddenly about a week ago as soon as I put her in the cot she cries, stands up and wants a cuddle. I've tried laying her back down but it just makes her cry even more and then she's inconsolable. I won't let her cry it out as I've tried that before using CC and it made her terrified of her bedroom. I know it's the wrong thing to do but I let her fall asleep in my arms then lay her down. When she wakes in the night she'll be standing up crying and it can take up to an hour to re-settle her. She's never had a dummy and she won't accept any sort of comfort teddy or blanket. I don't know if it's relevant but when she's falling asleep in my arms she is very restless. Throwing her head from side to side and she constantly plays with my ears too and kisses my neck! Her naps during the day are never consistent. They can be anything from half an hour to an hour. I don't know what else to do, it's getting me down and I'm so tired all the time and miserable as I'm dreading the nights. Any advice would be very welcome. Thanks in advance.

FATEdestiny Mon 02-Jan-17 20:55:17

Throwing her head from side to side...

That's a classic 'im trying really hard to go to sleep, im very tired' sign.

It's not unusual in gradual withdrawal to have to take several steps backwards at times when extra reassurance is needed (teething, illness, out of routine, not enough sleep etc). Then you just go back up the gradual withdrawal steps.

I don't know what your start point was and what small changes you made to get to the stage of blanket and hand-holding in cot to get to sleep. But what you needed to do was go back to what you used to do to give extra reassurance. It seems maybe you have gone very far backwbackwards in your progress.

All you do now is move forward through the steps again. Make a tiny change towards the outcome you want. Give it a few days and make another change and so on. It should be quicker to get back to where you were, but you still have to make small, gradual changes to get there.

boobsaclock Mon 02-Jan-17 21:39:38

Could it be teething? My lo gets so clingy at night when new teeth are on their way.

For what it's worth it's never wrong to hold your child smile

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