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4 month sleep regression - how long?!

(31 Posts)
MummySetra Mon 26-Dec-16 19:43:43

My little one has been getting up every 2 hours or so in the night and is feeding every time. This started 4 weeks ago pretty much dead on 4 months.
He is EBF
How long does this phase last?????

FATEdestiny Mon 26-Dec-16 21:13:42

Are you feeding more often during the daytime? 2 hourly daytime feeds will get the milk in her through the daytime so less is needed at night.

More daytime sleep also promotes deeper night time sleep. So limiting awake time (between naps) to about 40-60 minutes will help.

How/where is she going to sleep at night?

If she's going to sleep in your arms or lying with you feeding, you will get better sleep if you cosleep since next to you is where she'll want to be when she wakes up.

If you don't want to cosleep then this phase will last as long as it takes you and baby to work out a way for baby to get to sleep in the cot. Dummy, swaddle and in-cot reassurance helps with this.

LalaLeona Mon 26-Dec-16 21:21:31

I'm sorry to say that my baby's regression lasted a few months but I have friends who said it was just a few weeks so please don't feel down!

PotteringAlong Mon 26-Dec-16 21:24:29

DS 1 - it never went back. It lasted for about 18 months.

DS 2 - about 2 weeks.

Lenny1980 Mon 26-Dec-16 21:50:15

We're now at 6.5 months and it's still going. I know it's because he doesn't feed enough in the day but he's just not interested then. Driving me crackers.

AprilShowers16 Tue 27-Dec-16 00:15:41

From my limited understanding of the 4 month regression is a permanent change in the way they sleep as their sleep pattern becomes more like an adults and they move out of the newborn phase so in that respect they don't return to how they were but have to relearn new ways of sleeping (which I assume can be easy or hard depending on the baby).

If you google 4 month regression there are some good websites on it. We are currently a month into it too and at the moment are just going with whatever works to get some sleep (in our case co sleeping) until the new year as figure his routine is pretty disrupted anyway. The vague idea is that we're gearing up to some kind of sleep training in January to see if we can improve things but I'm afraid as we're not there yet I can't report back yet. Good luck though!

Scrumptiouscrumpets Tue 27-Dec-16 18:22:34

With DS 1 there was no improvement after two months, so I stopped feeding at every waking. This massively improved his sleep. He was feeding every two hours and I started feeding every 4, DP settled him for the wakings in between.

Kmoggy Wed 28-Dec-16 08:44:01

Scrumptious: can I ask how you managed to stop feeding at every waking? Mine is 17 weeks and this has been going on for a few weeks waking every 2 hrs at night wanting breast. He is so furious when he wakes, screaming , wriggling about cot, head throwing and spitting dummy. There is no way I can every see him being able to self settle anytime soon. Nothing I can do stops this other that breast. I have 1 yr old twins too so can't afford to wake them too with the screaming. He puts himself to sleep during the day fine, no dummy or anything

Feelingthelove Sat 31-Dec-16 02:01:00

We had a 7.30pm bedtime, one night feed at 4am and a 7am morning wake up.... until his 16 week injections then it all went down the toilet.

We are now at 24 weeks and we have good nights where he will wake 2 or 3 times and then others where he will wake every 60-90mins.

He is EBF and I like PPs think he isn't feeding enough during the day - despite my best efforts. Everything is just too interesting during the day!

Watching the advice with interest! But fell you're pain OP flowers

fruityb Sat 31-Dec-16 02:08:49

Currently going through this. DS is formula fed and is currently shrieking his arse off after OH went downstairs with him and fed him. He is teething as well so we're currently suffering a double whammy. He's unpredictable as he has slept through in the last two weeks but the last two nights he's been back on it. Not helped by the fact he really didn't nap that well in the day yesterday so knew we could have a rough night.

I'm wide awake and just want to cry. And I'm not even up with him. We put him in his own room and he slept through the other night. Now we're back on the half midnight shriek a thon.

Things were going so well. I just can't handle the noise he makes it makes my teeth itch!! Which I know it's meant to but sweet Jesus.

So I have no advice other than saying I feel you and will just keep using MN in the night to vent my spleen!

MummySetra Sat 31-Dec-16 07:44:50

So, we put him in his own room last night and between 10.30pm and 7am there was only one wake up. Granted it was 1.5hr long but I got two 3hr stints either side which is much better than what has been happening!

Feelingthelove Sat 31-Dec-16 19:16:13

Really pleased last night was a good night OP. Fingers crossed for tonight

Scrumptiouscrumpets Sun 01-Jan-17 19:31:58

Kmoggy
I slept in another room and DP settled DS with cuddles and shush-patting. It was surprisingly easy, he went back to sleep after half an hour or so and didn't cry nearly as much as I feared. He was older than your baby though and didn't take much at each night feed.

From what you describe, it sounds as if your LO really is hungry. Is he getting enough during the day? Is he very distracted during the feeds? I'd make sure he gets a nice big feed every two hours during the day.
Then I'd work on skipping every other night feed with cuddles and the dummy, preferably done by your partner and not yourself! Seeing as he can self settle during the day, your chances are good he'll manage that during the night, too - provided he isn't genuinely hungry.

That way, you should get about four hours of uninterrupted sleep. Once you have that, you can work on gradually stopping the remaining feeds.

Eminado Mon 02-Jan-17 06:17:49

How do you get them to drink more in the day? She is so distractible!

Naps beautifully and easily all day the. Nights are carnage.

I am so so tired.

Fruitboxjury Mon 02-Jan-17 06:25:05

It lasted 8 awful, exhausting, horrendous months for us. I also think it probably brought on a spell of pnd which I never addressed. My DD didn't sleep day or night and cried continuously from tiredness. My advice OP is to do whatever you can to get some extra help, make a change of some kind. A little is more than nothing and I wish I hadn't just tried to keep going and "get on with it" because that's what everyone kept telling me to do. I really don't think I will ever forget it, good luck to you

Fruitboxjury Mon 02-Jan-17 06:27:25

And by the way you CAN sleep when baby sleeps, I remember laughing this off at the time and now just a year later I look back and realise how stupid I was not to take the opportunity if it was there. Mine never napped for more than 20mins though so I never really had the chance but if yours naps well please do it to help you get through the night

Scrumptiouscrumpets Mon 02-Jan-17 06:46:48

Eminado
It really is hard getting them to concentrate on feeding at that age! DS 2 feeds best in a dark room with no noise... I rarely get the occasion with a toddler around.
I also put a loose shawl over my shoulder to cover his face and stop him from looking around, not so effective but better than nothing.

Boygirlmummy Mon 02-Jan-17 06:56:25

echoes potteringalong with DS it was weeks with DD it is still going on and she is nearly two. Sorry! Hope it resolves asap-it is hellish

Anatidae Mon 02-Jan-17 07:05:36

Ds is 15 months and has never improved. sad

foobio Mon 02-Jan-17 07:30:31

I'm going through this now too. DD is 5 1/2 months and hasn't slept well for the last 8 weeks or so (problems started with her jabs, then colds, holidays, colds and being away from home).
Massively worsened over Christmas where she napped in people's arms, hated the travel cot, so coslept on the boob all night and now screams whenever in her cot.

My approach (albeit only for the last 24hrs) is:
- Make sure she has proper feeds during the day, no snacking.
- No feeding to sleep.
- Daytime naps in the cot.
- Bedtime routine, including for naps (sleeping bag, story, bear & blanket, lights out)
- Try to get her to self settle instead of rocking or feeding. (At the moment this requires patting tummy, stroking head and singing, and doesn't reliably work)
- Not feeding every time she wakes in the night.
- Try to establish a daytime routine.

Mixed success, daytime naps have been 40 mins of effort for a 10 min nap. Last night was ok though. She woke about every 20 mins from 9-12, but mostly managed to get her back to sleep without picking her up.
She then slept til 3, fed to sleep, one wake up rocked back to sleep and fed to sleep again at 7.
I regret caving in and feeding, as she didn't have much either time and just wanted to suckle to sleep.

Good luck, and let me know if you find an approach which works!

MoonlightMedicine Mon 02-Jan-17 07:32:57

So sorry tI'm say this but DD slept through until 4 months. It then all went to pot and hasn't recovered yet. We've tried everything. She is 3 in a couple of weeks!!!

fruityb Mon 02-Jan-17 08:54:50

DS slept from nine till ten minutes ago!! Yet he was awake and feeding at 2am three nights ago. I cannot work the little bugger out!

However I have had a full uninterrupted night of sleep so I feel ready for tonight when the rules will likely change lol. He napped very well in the day yesterday so that may have been a reason. Who the heck knows!!

Eminado Tue 03-Jan-17 05:45:00

Thanks scrumptious

My dd goes mad if i cover her during a feed - bobbing and flailing off the boob. Makes feeding in public hard work 😔

cheekybean Tue 03-Jan-17 06:37:00

Morning everyone. This is my fourth awake since midnight. My ds2 is a mixture of breastfed, formula fed and solids. He is four months old. He wakes every couple of hours but i dont think he is always hungry, i think sometimes he is wanting company. He has been in his own room since day 1 so it is not a sudden change.

I have tried

White noise
Ticking clocks,
Sleep mitts
Formula feed
Breastfeed and cuddles

I have a husband on shifts, two other children and am so tired im not safe to drive. Right now i just want to cry. Kids will be up soon and i gave had 40 minutes sleep! Another day in front of the telly for them!

My other two thrived on the contented baby routine and both slept through by 8 weeks. This baby slept through from day 1 but from his second lot of jabs has decided sleep is for wimps.

My mother is narcissistic so cant and wont ask for her help. She thinks ds2 should never have been born. More than two children is common or some such crap. Her suggestion was brandy and/or calpol. I have no idea how i made it through childhood.

MIL doesnt drive.

Sorry about the post but im so tired now. Thanks for listening

Tabitha1983 Tue 03-Jan-17 07:24:01

Morning 😴😒 Just didn't want to read and run...poor you...I can remember the feelings of chronic sleep deprivation so well with my 1st DD. She also slept well until 4 months then it all went down hill and I think that makes it worse because you know they can do it but just won't! I also didn't have any other children to look after in they day either so I can imagine how hard it must be for you. Such a shame your mother is no help...
With DD I suffered weeks of no sleep, takin all the advise like you say of dark room, warm cot, comforter, white noise, cuddles, dummy, zippede Zip but eventually what sorted it was the controlled crying technique (not sure why it's called controlled tho reallly 😭). It was horrific at the time and I cried as much as her but I have to say it was 3 nights then completely sorted! She has slept through every night since! No joke and she's nearly 3! Dreading the 4 month sleep regression with DS (currently 9 weeks ) x

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