8 Month Sleep Regression or Something Else?

[user1474565301]

I'm REALLY struggling with looking after my 9 month old little girl.
I
Her sleep has become increasingly worse over the last couple of months to the point where I am starting to resent her. I don't want to be saying that as I love her more than anything but the lack of sleep, lack of control and the fact that I can't keep her happy are making me lose my mind.
She currently wakes up twice a night and cannot get back to sleep. Each time she screams for up to two hours and will not be comforted by anything, not even me picking her up, rocking and cuddling. She only stops if I breastfeed her. I feed her at one of these wakings and have no problem with letting her drop this in her own time, but could it be the case that she does actually need more than one nightfeed?
Her naps have also become virtually non-existent. I try everything I can to get her down, but she won't give in and just pulls up to kneeling at the side of her cot.
Please help me. I want to make my baby happy, but we are both currently miserable and exhausted.

[FATEdestiny]

lack of control

Is she your first child? Dealing with a lack of control is a 'thing' all parents have to go through. The very eeadon most parents of second or subsequent children are much more chilled out is specifically because they accept they have little control during the early months.

You have to be led by the baby. Enforcing your control and expectations mostly makes life harder. Having said that, there's always stuff you can do to encourage baby to do things more convenient for you - things like routines and settling styles - that can improve sleep.

does actually need more than one nightfeed?

It sounds like it. I can't tell you if your child needs more calories. You baby can tell you though, and seems to be. Milk is still a viral aspect of baby's diet until 12 months old, she should be having at least a pint a day. I appreciate you are bf so don't know quantities. But a pint is a lot of milk.

Would she go straight back to sleep at both wake ups if you fed her straight away at each of these? Why don't you do this? Breastfeeding at night is about far more than just milk.

How would you feel about night weaning and moving on to formula at night, if needed?

If you are resenting her and struggling, maybe it time to change? At least then your partner can share responsibility at night.

[Leviathan]

Hey there, I feel for you. My DS (now 6) sleep went pear shaped at about the time he started on solid foods. He seemed to really need that milk in the night. Think (it's a while now, so hazy) I probably co-slept with him a fair bit so I actually got a bit of rest too.

Don't be too hard on yourself, it feels like ages but it will feel like it's gone so quickly when you get a chance to look back on it. I would go with what FATEdestiny said, try a feed at the wake ups and see how you get on.

It will get less often, I heard someone say 'food is for fun till you're one' - wish I'd heard it earlier as I could have relaxed more! But at 9months, they are still so small and still working out how to get all that yummy milk goodness from the new food they are trying.

good luck

[d270r0]

Depends what shes eating in the day. If she is still mostly just on breastmilk she probably does need 2 nightfeeds, breastmilk goes through very quickly and they only take as much as they need so that they are not hungry anymore, they don't 'fill up' as much.
If she is eating lots of solids in the day this will fill her up more so she won't need as much at night.
I breastfed my 2 up to 13 months and 15 months, although by the end it was very little and they were mostly on solids. I found sleep gradually got better and they slept for longer periods as they ate more solids and I cut the breastmilk down.
Also I don't know your sleeping arrangements- mine were in bed with me up to about 7 months- and woke almost constantly wanting a feed. I found when I got them out of my bed and they got used to being in their own cot in their room they woke less as they didn't smell me and want a feed! It will all just happen gradually.