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The co-sleeping toddler - transitioning to big bed advice

(4 Posts)
Swannykazoo Mon 10-Oct-16 14:10:08

Hi all,
As it was co-cleep or no sleep, I have co-slept with DS for 2 years 9 months now. He's always been a poor sleeper - was very itchy with allergies/eczema for a long time and BF to sleep (though now will BF and then pull off to sleep which seems like a miracle after all the eleventy million times I failed at the Pantley Pull off) But yes, BF is a sleep prop, though he naps brilliantly at nursery where there is no BF!
So hurray, he's been asking to sleep in his "Big boy bed" - hurray. Only problem is, he's completely convinced that's where I should sleep too. There has been devastation and tears about this when we tried to discuss it. The last two nights I've put him to sleep, but he's still waking regularly so I've ended up going to get him and moving to my bed.
I've tried suggesting he walks down the hall to my room but that seems beyond him as a concept in daylight let alone night time.
So - should I
A) just suck it up and spend a few weeks sleeping in his bed and then try to move out
B) Lay down the rule now that mummy is sleeping in her bed and will help him go to sleep - and then try to resettle in his bed?
C) Drink more gin?
Any advice of what's worked for older children would be great. I always thought it would be a case of him moving when he's ready but this is a bit like he's not ready, but wants to. Not long potty trained and all teeth through. DH and I are separating so no issue about needing DS out of my bed. DH has never helped overnight, and I need to get a reasonable bit of sleep as work full time and do one of those jobs where you'd really like to think people are not working as sleep deprived zombies.

Swannykazoo Tue 11-Oct-16 10:03:36

Oh dear - anyone?

crumpeteer Tue 11-Oct-16 22:19:25

Following with interest, little advice as i´m in the same boat with a 3yo. We´re at the point of actually going to her bed to sleep (which she used to vehemently protest against, so a minor victory already...), reading books and cuddling for a little bit. Then I sit up ( gradual retreat style) which she wails about saying she doesn't want to sleep by herself.

Anything I say to placate her or even if I ignore her results in moderate protest followed by sleep till about 3am, where I have to pick her up and take to my bed as she´s incapable of crossing the 2metre distance.
So no advice at all just more questions: how do you get them to want sleep by themselves...? I hope someone wise will come along!

Swannykazoo Wed 12-Oct-16 09:30:44

Hey crumpeteer are you me? I've decided I am not sleeping in a single bed for prolonged periods of time, so am sticking out with the "mummy will help you fall asleep, then go to her bed after extensive MNing, Mummy is not sleeping all night in your bed"
If he wakes I've brought him into my bed but there was a lot of tears this morning that we weren't in big boy bed.
We might practice pretending to be asleep, waking up, coming down the corridor and waking up pretending to be asleep mummy during daytime as well.
I really thought it was going to be a case of him wanting to go when he was ready, not wanting us both to go....

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