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trouble getting 11 week baby to sleep at bedtime

15 replies

LimesMum · 09/10/2016 20:44

Wondering if anyone can help please...

Having real trouble getting my baby to go to bed at night!!

She's a huge motion junkie (which I know isn't ideal) and during the day I can tick her or whatever and then get her down ok

But at night she feeds, is clearly tired but will not settle. If DH or I gets her to sleep, when we then put her down (wherever that may be) she just wakes and screams blue murder!!

Pretty sure she's a bit young for CC?! It's just getting ridiculous!! We have zero evening!! She will eventually fall asleep after a late feed at 11ish but is otherwise very very upset.

When I try and feed her she seems to really want the boob but once let down happens she starts screaming! We do t have a dummy.... Wonder if this would help??

Thanks and advice greatly appreciated!!

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Heirhelp · 09/10/2016 20:47

Have you tried just keeping the lights low in the living room and letting her sleep on you?

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MadrigalElectromotive · 09/10/2016 20:49

Cluster feeding and being unsettled is very normal at that age. It gets easier. Flowers

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Rozdeek · 09/10/2016 20:49

Yes too young for cc I'm afraid - it worked wonders with my son but he was 6.5 months.

In the meantime I recommend:

  • swaddle
  • dummy
  • white noise (LOUD)
  • very dark room
  • sleepyhead
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BunloafAndCrumpets · 09/10/2016 20:52

This sounds normal to me - my advice is to go with her flow for now. Agree too young for cc. My babies slept from around midnight to 8am (with wakes for feeds) at that age. Bed time gradually got earlier and earlier but at 11w dc was with me downstairs until last feed at 1130pm ish. I think it's relatively normal to have no evening to yourself with such a young baby but it will get easier, gradually. Flowers

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LimesMum · 09/10/2016 21:00

Thanks all! The problem is I'd have no problem not having an evening if she would just sit with us and watch tv or just sleep on us but that just doesn't happen - she is totally non snugly/cuddly - is be more than happy to let her snooze on me all evening!!

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LimesMum · 09/10/2016 21:02

Also she isn't cluster feeding anymore at all - quite the opposite - she feeds at 630pm (ish) and then pretty much wants nothing to do with feeding again until 10pm earliest - apart from when she sometimes sucks like crazy until let down happens and then she sort of chokes and pull off me screaming!!

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Rozdeek · 09/10/2016 21:03

Sympathies - mine was like that. Still is in fact at 7 months (non cuddly), hence why we had to do cc, nothing else worked.

At that age the dummy and loud white noise worked a treat.

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camena · 09/10/2016 21:06

Lots of babies that young don't really have a sleep routine, so "bedtime" isn't really a thing for them. Kellymom has some good links to sleep studies if you want to find out what's "normal".

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LimesMum · 11/10/2016 07:59

After another night of non stop crying between 6-11 I'm exhausted and totally unsure what else to try!!

DH works away during the week and I also have a very demanding 2.5 yr old.

Does anyone else have any ideas???

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camena · 11/10/2016 09:41

The sleep deprivation that young babies bring is awful Sad Flowers

Is she crying while she is with you or while she is in her bed? Because at that age DD just napped on the couch next to me until we went to bed at 10 or 11, she wanted to be with someone.

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camena · 11/10/2016 09:43

Also if you have a forceful let down that's bothering her there are some ideas here.

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DocMcFanjo · 11/10/2016 09:59

Okay just my two cents worth but my 10 week old DD was like this the past 2 weeks from about 6pm. Just really cranky and unsettled in the evening, wanting to suck but not to feed, and not wanting to be put down. Won't take a soother but my letdown is forceful so it's difficult for her to comfort suck. I knew it wasn't cluster feeding- been there done that.

I twigged she might have been just seriously overtired and overstimulated as we have a toddler and bright and noisy evenings.
So I brought her up to our room at 6.30 one evening, got her into pjs and clean nappy, darkened the room and just gave her a quiet feed, then rocked her. Tried putting her down but she woke so just gave her the same boob again (less forceful letdown this time so she could comfort suck better) and basically kept up the long feed till asleep, wind, cuddle, cot cycle until she finally settled in the cot with me holding her hands so she didn't startle. She sucked on a muslin a bit last nigh too but don't want that to become a habit.

She was asleep by 8.30 first night, 8 the next and it's now around 7.30/8 after about an hour or a little less to settle her. She'll sleep till we come to bed and has even on occasion slept till 2 or 3am!

So for us it was definitely worth persisting with calm dark feeds from about 6/6.30 or so. Whenever she usually starts to fuss basically.

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DocMcFanjo · 11/10/2016 10:04

Oh and re toddler the first few nights were over the weekend so DH sorted her bedtime as it all took so long to settle DD2 but now that she's settling earlier I could theoretically pop a DVD on for DD1 and settle DD2 then deal with DD1. Once the baby's routine shortens anyway.... Hopeful!

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Rozdeek · 11/10/2016 10:05

Have you tried gripe water/infacol/colief?

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LimesMum · 12/10/2016 21:43

Thanks all!! Yes she cries on me too - doesn't seem to want to be on me!!

I've tried all apart from colief....

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