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6mo won't settle for me

(8 Posts)
r2d256 Sun 28-Aug-16 20:13:10

I might sound incredibly precious so bear with me..
Our 6mo DD used to be BF to sleep and transferred in to cot in own room (she went in there 4.5 months when she didn't appear to settle in her co-sleeper)

Now she doesn't appear to want feeding to sleep, a feed is part of her bedtime routine and she is always really excited for it but she won't fall asleep there anymore.

What has been working is DH has started walking/cuddling rocking her and transferring her to bed with some relaxing music.
I'm upset because I've tried three times in the sling to rock and transfer, she'll fall asleep but wake when I transfer her .

DH says it's ok as for the first 6 months she only wanted me and I should see this as getting some freedom back at bedtime but stupidly I feel rejected and also feel we should both be able to get her to sleep.

When she wakes she will resettle when BF just not initially to go to sleep. I know I'm being silly but would you persevere in sharing bedtime responsibilities or let him take over ?

FATEdestiny Sun 28-Aug-16 22:23:25

The favoured parent at bedtime often flips back and forth during the baby and toddler years. I wouldn't worry, it won't be like this for very long

Coconut0il Sun 28-Aug-16 22:53:50

As long as one of you can settle her I wouldn't worry. Agree with above that the preferred parent changes regularly.

lilwelshyrs Sun 28-Aug-16 23:04:59

It won't last forever. She'll change how she wants to be put to sleep soon - just as you've cracked it too ;)
My DS doesn't feed to sleep anymore either. I lie next to him and sing or shush him and pretend to fall asleep too. He suddenly stopped doing it one day and I was very confused! Every now and then he'll do it but very rarely.
We also used to spend hours rocking him to sleep, but we don't do that anymore either!

lilwelshyrs Sun 28-Aug-16 23:05:21

Oh and my DS is nearly 10 months now and BF too smile

r2d256 Mon 29-Aug-16 06:34:15

Oh brill ! Thanks all, sounds really positive smilesmile
I think I was just a tad emotional as she's suddenly stopped feeding to sleep, didn't seem too fussed overnight about feeding either when she woke. She'd settle for me rubbing her back (husband on nights- shift worker) but it wouldn't last long and by the time is gone back to bed she was awake again, there were plenty of times by looking at her baby monitor that she could roll over and go back to sleep but she doesn't seem to get that far as if something is stopping her drifting off in her cot, any suggestions ?

Either way she came in with me (again not so fussed about feeding!) and we slept ok!

sophiaslullaby Mon 29-Aug-16 16:10:34

Aww r2d256 I feel for you - yesterday & last night DS wouldn't settle for me, is nearly 10months and BF to sleep too. But DH was able to rock him, lie down on the single spare bed in DS's room and settle him.
Whereas this afternoon for his nap he ended up sitting up in the middle of his cot and moaned to sleep (odd to watch).
Like you, I feel a bit rejected but comforting what FATEdestiny says, that if he is preferring his father to settle him then maybe time for me to start sleeping through the night instead!! ;-)

mandyemma13 Thu 01-Sep-16 23:47:50

Your both doing it wrong. Let her cry it out for a bit. Shush her and put a dummy in and keep ignoring her. She will learn to go to sleep by herself. I wrapped my first in cotton wool. She still sleeps in my bed now she is nearlly 5! My 2nd son slept right through since being 6 weeks old and just falls asleep in a routine every night. Don't give attention at bedtime it will ruin your relationship and sex life...

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