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Moving 16 month old to her own room

(7 Posts)
LMonkey Tue 12-Jul-16 20:32:39

16 month old DD has always been in our room as we've only just managed to move from a 2 bed to a 3 bed house and i didn't want her sharing with her brother as she would wake him up. We moved a couple of months ago but her new bedroom was in a state and it's taken us this long to sort it. Anyway it's now more or less ready so it will be time to make the big transition.......any tips please? I should mention she is still breastfeeding like crazy and does wake up in the night and this is how I get her back off to sleep.....yes I know...I still haven't tackled this problem yet. What I have been doing for ages now is bring her into our bed when she wakes so she co-sleeps for a large part of the night. It's not ideal but I gave up on trying to put her back in her cot as she just wouldn't go back to sleep and I would end up having hellish nights. Im really hoping being in her own room will help her sleep better but maybe I've missed the boat with this as I'm sure the transition will be even harder at this age.

Would be grateful for advice/tips. Thanks

CobsAhoy Wed 13-Jul-16 09:29:21

Hi OP,

My DD is still sleeping with us and breastfeeding every minute of everyday so I don't have personal experience, but after speaking to a friend who has recently gone through this, and doing a bit of reading, I am planning to do this....

sarahockwell-smith.com/2016/04/12/how-to-stop-cosleeping-and-bedsharing/

There is also a link about stopping night feeds which she reccomends you do first. It's a nice gentle approach, but consequently isnt a quick resolution, so not for everybody but I'm a soft touch so will do anything to avoid tears smile

Good luck!

mrsmoomoopoopoo Wed 13-Jul-16 16:11:31

Does she feed to sleep before putting her down?
I would personally start putting her in own room for naps through the day so she gets used to it then put her in her room at night.

PatMullins Wed 13-Jul-16 16:26:30

I could have written this. It's hard, isn't it?
Watching with interest smile

MiddleClassProblem Wed 13-Jul-16 16:33:59

Maybe trying her just napping in their first?

Does she self settle in her cot? I know it sounds harsh but if she wakes in the night, have you tried just leaving her and watching her on the monitor to see if she settles herself? It might be worth trying controlled crying if she can't self settle/always needs bf. It's really hard and not easy to do but normally only takes a couple of days to work. Mine was 2. I cried so much day one but day 2 I only went in twice and then she was asleep. She since has always sorted herself out and slept through although she was 6m when we started so very different personality wise to 16m. It might be a lot harder and I might have been very lucky.

LMonkey Wed 13-Jul-16 20:12:36

Thank you for your replies and thanks for the link to that great website, Cobs.

She ALWAYS feeds to sleep and always has done, unless I leave her to cry for hours. DP looks after her while I'm at work in the morning but when with him she just cries for a little while then goes off to sleep. For naps in the day we have always just laid her on the sofa after having fallen asleep on either of us as she has never slept particularly well in her cot in the daytime.

She doesn't self settle and relies on a boob every time she wakes. I have done controlled crying in the past. Over a period of 7 days there was an improvement (although still didn't sleep all the way through the night and would wake at an awkward time early morning about 4ish and I would never know if that should count as her first morning feed and bring her in bed with me or should I let her cry it out for potentially the next 2 hours until I was meant to wake up anyway??!). The positive effects of that last attempt wore off with the next bout of teething/illness and I simply didn't have the energy to go through it all again, I know it sounds crap.

Another thing that happened on earlier attempts at cc was that she would scream the place down on night 1 (as expected) then night 2 there would be a massive improvement or she wouldn't wake but then back to screaming on night 3 or 4 so there would be no consistency and no permanent improvement.

I'm not really sure I would feel comfortable doing cc at this age though.....it's almost like she is too aware now and it would upset her too much?

mrsmoomoopoopoo Thu 14-Jul-16 17:44:24

My dd always bf to sleep and from 5 months to 7 months she slept in bed with me (dh in spare bed!). She would fall asleep feeding and then I would slowly move her on to the bed but she would wake and then I would have to cuddle her back to sleep and then try again.
I got so fed up of this so started trying to get her to fall asleep laying next to me. It took a couple of nights but eventually she got it. I would just rub/pat her chest and hold her hand.
I think this really helped to get my dd to sleep in her cot. If they fall asleep in your arms they expect to wake up there too and when they can't see you they get upset and can't go back to sleep.
Once dd started falling asleep not in my arms I then started putting her in cot for her morning nap and then when she was used to her room/bed she went in her cot at night and it seemed to work really well.

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