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Desperate!

(19 Posts)
Whatiswrongwithmykid Thu 23-Jun-16 22:05:22

I'm completely desperate for help with my 7 month old and her lack of sleep. I've never had longer than a couple of hours at a stretch even with sleep training. The past couple of weeks we have regressed to constant waking and crying and refusing to be settled.

Tonight I've ended up screaming 'Shut up!' which only served to upset her more. Now I feel bad and she is downstairs with me.

She is so difficult to get to sleep and wakes at the slightest thing. So she spends her life whinging and moaning because she is tired. Today I had to put her in her cot for 15 minutes and walk away because I was getting so angry.

I just don't know what to do. I breastfeed but it doesn't send her to sleep. Neither does cuddling or patting or even white noise anymore. The bouncy chair used to work but lately she just screams.

We have a bedtime routine with a bath etc. She has a snuggle toy and a Ewan sheep to try and make sleep associations. I have a fan so she isn't too hot in this humid weather. I don't know what else I can do?

Last night she went down at 7. She is often screaming with tiredness by then even if she only woke up at 6 from a nap. She slept until 11.30 and then woke every hour or so until 4am. She then just kept getting up on her hands and knees and rocking. If I look at her she smiles but cries and whinges otherwise so I can't just ignore her.
Tonight she went down at 6.30 as I couldn't keep her up longer but now she is awake and refusing to settle. Calpol hasn't helped.

What on earth can I do!?!? The lack of sleep is really hard. I feel miserable. I'm eating crap all day and shouting at my other kids for the slightest thing. I can't go on like this. sad

Whatiswrongwithmykid Thu 23-Jun-16 23:31:05

Anyone?

Sapphire123 Thu 23-Jun-16 23:59:15

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Whatiswrongwithmykid Fri 24-Jun-16 00:18:41

Hello! Thank you for replying.

She is very inconsistent. I try to do a 30 min nap around 9am and then another longer nap at lunchtime. Lately she has been napping for longer in the morning and then not wanting to nap until mid afternoon. Either way she isn't staying asleep for long and will constantly wake up.

After my first post she finally went to sleep but woke half an hour later. She then was rolling around and rocking on all fours. I'm trying to get her to sleep now by patting her tummy. She is exhausted but won't stop kicking her legs.

Whatiswrongwithmykid Fri 24-Jun-16 00:20:35

Feed times roughly
4-5 lots of breast feeds to try and send her back to sleep.
8 porridge
11 breastfeed
12 lunch
3 breastfeed
5-6 dinner
6.30 breastfeed

Then feeds during the night to try and get her to sleep.

MessyBun247 Fri 24-Jun-16 07:24:56

Sounds like she's about to learn to crawl? They can get really unsettled before they learn a major new skill. Their brain works overtime and they find it hard to switch off to sleep.

Whatiswrongwithmykid Fri 24-Jun-16 11:32:35

Yes I think she is.

MyBreadIsEggy Fri 24-Jun-16 11:42:47

When she's rolling around and rocking on all fours but not crying or distressed in any way, what happens if you just leave her to it?

Whatiswrongwithmykid Fri 24-Jun-16 13:58:06

She starts to whinge and moan because she is tired.

MyBreadIsEggy Fri 24-Jun-16 14:28:12

Hmm they are strange little creatures aren't they?!
Maybe she's overtired by the time you're putting her down? My Dd had (and still has at 14mo) a very tiny window in which she can go from quite happy to an overtired gremlin confused
Also, are nap times consistently at the same time everyday where possible?? I know that's not always easy, especially if you have other children, but once we got into a solid routine (took about a week of doing everything at the same time every single day), dd's naps started falling into place, and the night time gradually followed suit. We also did sleep training at 7.5/8 months (which I know is a controversial topic on MN!) - it was tough - took all my willpower not to keep going in the room (I only went in if she cried) - and after a few difficult days of that, she used to still roll around/crawl up and down the cot for a few minutes and then realise that I wasn't playing the game anymore and it was time to sleep.

Whatiswrongwithmykid Fri 24-Jun-16 14:43:41

I try to make naps the same time each day but she resists! I thought it was down to teething but the tooth is through now and it's still going on.

Sleep training isn't working here. Though I've not tried controlled crying. I don't think it would work as she gets really worked up if I leave her.

MyBreadIsEggy Fri 24-Jun-16 14:56:08

I did a kind of "controlled crying".
I did our usual bedtime routine of, bath, milk, cuddles/a bit of rocking and down into the cot drowsy but awake. Then I left the room.
She never actually cried proper hysterical tears, just whinged and whined a bit. I would leave her doing that for 1 minute, go back in, lay her down, do shhh-pat until she was quiet and then leave again. The next time she started whinging I left her for two minutes before going in the room. Then three minutes etc.
I only ever got up to seven minutes.....which was the longest seven minutes of my life! But it worked. After 4 or 5 nights of "training", in which the amount of times I had to go in an resettle her got less and less, she was having a little roll around and then just going to sleep.
I know it's definitely not for everyone, and if my Dd had really cried, then I probably wouldn't have carried on with it, but it worked for us.
Do you think it could be the fact that it's you putting her to bed that could be the problem? My Dd went through a phase where she would play silly buggers if I tried to do bedtime, but would play ball for my DH!!! Do you have someone else around who could try putting her down after you've fed her??

Whatiswrongwithmykid Fri 24-Jun-16 15:13:34

No she is the same with DH. It's screaming and tears.
The actual putting her to bed isn't the biggest issue. It's the night waking and the fact she can't be settled back to sleep due to the rocking, the foot holding, the crying and the sheer refusal to sleep.

MyBreadIsEggy Fri 24-Jun-16 16:37:51

Oh bless you sad
Does she take a dummy?? Or sleep in grobags?? Sounds mean, but a grobag stopped my Dd (to a certain extent) from standing/crawling around (and now she's walking and climbing it slows her down a bit hmm)

Whatiswrongwithmykid Fri 24-Jun-16 18:11:56

She has a dummy but spits it out to carry on moaning hmm

I've stopped using the gro bag due to the heat. Maybe I should try it again and just leave off clothes underneath.

MyBreadIsEggy Fri 24-Jun-16 18:51:06

Hopefully she will learn to put the dummy into her own mouth soon - my Dd was about 8 months when she figured it out and it did make lots of difference!!
And yeah, I know what you mean about the heat sad She should be alright in a 1 tog grobag and a thin vest, or just a nappy.
I really hope she starts sleeping better for you soon!! It's such a killer isn't it? You don't realise until you have your own kids how mentally draining sleep issues can be!

Whatiswrongwithmykid Sat 25-Jun-16 07:01:22

Thank you for the gro bag suggestion!!!!!!!
She slept so much better. She still woke a lot but was easier to settle as she wasn't flipping herself over all the time.

Zogthebiggestdragon Sat 25-Jun-16 20:37:03

My daughter got 8 teeth in a few weeks so it could still be teeth.

We found that when we were giving calpol for teething it actually woke her up more - she would sleep for a few hours and then wake up raring to go. Something to do with the ingredients - a few other people on here have had the same. So if you are using paracetamol try one of the supermarket brands. I'm not going to admit how long it took me to work out the link.

MyBreadIsEggy Sat 25-Jun-16 20:43:45

Yay!!!! Great news OP grin

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