Is it cio if you're in the cot with them...

[TippetyTapWriter]

I have no idea how to get 13mo ds to to sleep any more. He fights sleep like it's torture and always has. 30-40 minutes of rocking him while slowly pacing the room and shushing has been the only way to get him to sleep for months. Now he fights that so hard I can't even hold him. How do I get him to sleep? If I put him in cot awake he gets hysterical to the point he can hardly breathe within a few minutes, even if I'm there stroking, shushing or trying to stroke him as he spends the whole time jumping up and down and flinging himself around the cot. I even tried getting in the cot today, he still got hysterical. I gave it over 20 mins. It seemed cruel to continue. Still feel bad about it as not a fan of cc etc.

But I genuinely have no idea what to do. It seems like he will never nap again! Pram does work sometimes but I'm meant to be working at home while he sleeps, so I can't do all his naps pushing him around in pram.

Feel stuck and panicky! Thanks for any help.

[luckiestgirl]

I wouldn't do CIO because it sounds like he gets hysterical quite easily. I'm would suggest CC instead, with one minute increments. That way you are calming him down completely and the crying is only in short bursts. It's much easier that way for them to get the idea. As long as you don't give in, he'll realise that you're not going to let him fall asleep with you there, so he'll get bored of crying eventually when he realises it only gets him a cuddle until he's calm, and then you're gone again. In my experience, two nights of hell then you're through it.

[fluffikins]

He sounds like my dd, so cc or cio wouldn't work (not that I've tried but he sounds the same kind of temperament). I'm buying a projector to see if that helps her like the cot better this week and will report back. Otherwise I just feed to sleep or rock and then have to hold her for 20 mins and then transfer.

[fluffikins]

Do you think you could take the sides off the cot? I think I'll do that when dd is ready as I really think it will help her not feel so caged in. And separate from me

[Zaurak]

m would suggest CC instead, with one minute increments. That way you are calming him down completely and the crying is only in short bursts

In theory ... In practice our ds is not calmed at all by us going back in, shushing, patting, etc 😪
Cc failed completely for us. He was just increasingly upset, then hysterical and was then awake every night we tried it, all night, and upset the day after. There was no calming down between

Op sorry that sounds negative :( we got round him being hysterical if we even went near the cot by making it brighter and more fun. It's probably not up to safety standards but we put a few toys in there (the little books he likes) and an activity centre thing on the side and a really big complex mobile - we are now just putting him in there for a minute or two at a time just to play and get used to it. I know they are supposed to sleep, it's not supposed to be fun and stimulating, and you should t really have any toys in at all but needs must.

The only way I can get him to sleep is lying down with him and feeding, then slipping away when he's asleep

[Catmuffin]

A friend had a machine you put the back wheels of a buggy on that rocked them to sleep. (Same sensation as a car ride rather than rocking i think.) She was desperate so tried everything. It could be good for naps. (She coslept at night.)

[Catmuffin]

Think it was this. Rating looks good
www.amazon.co.uk/Robopax-Automatic-Baby-Rocker/dp/B004DORTGM?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21

[TippetyTapWriter]

Thanks for replies. Zaurak, that sounds exactly like ds. Even if I wanted to do cc I couldn't because my presence doesn't soothe him. He's not crying because I've left the room, he's crying because he knows I'm trying to get him to sleep! The only way to stop the crying is to take him out of cot, take him downstairs and make it very obvious it's not naptime, eg by playing with him. Even holding him makes him upset when he's tired because he associates it with being rocked to sleep.

Thanks for link to rocker. Perhaps combination of that, white noise and a projector might simulate being walked outside in pram!? Unfortunately I can't bring the pram back home once he's asleep because we've got steps to the front door and bumping the pram up wakes him. And he wakes anyway if the pram stops moving for a minute or two.

And feeding to sleep doesn't work as I don't breastfeed (complications after birth). He's also never fallen asleep lying down with me. He doesn't stay still long enough. Even before he could crawl he'd wriggle all over the place until he was off the bed. Besides, it just makes him cry if I stay still and 'ignore' him.

Who designed babies without an off switch??!