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Toddler cot refusal

(8 Posts)
curiousmonkey Mon 25-Apr-16 21:24:38


My 22 month old previously great sleeper has suddenly started screaming at nap and bedtimes refusing to go in the cot. He is tired, but won't go anywhere near the cot. He previously used to ask to be put down in the cot and would fall asleep very quickly. Now, once he's in there (transferred asleep) he will wake up in the night and be inconsolable. He will fall straight back to sleep immediately if picked up, put in our bed or even laid down on the floor. We are getting him to sleep by holding him, but it's taking ages!

Any ideas what's going on? We got back from holiday last week where he slept in a double bed, not without it's problems there as he was used to settling himself to sleep, and we couldn't leave him awake in case he fell out, so he was wanting to play rather than sleep. The first 2 nights back were in a cot and he was absolutely fine, straight to sleep on his own like he used to be. He had a slight cold a few days ago and his back molars may be shifting around, but he's never done this before when ill or teething. I thought separation anxiety originally, but then he fell asleep immediately on the floor pretty much on his own.

curiousmonkey Tue 26-Apr-16 17:37:22

So he refused to be put down in his cot when asleep last night, so spent the first part of the night on the floor. Then he woke up about 1am so we brought him in with us, where he slept till 7. Really don't want to be setting up bad habits, but am at a loss as to what to do next!

We bought him a toddler bed today - will this make it better or worse do you think?

InsaneDame Tue 26-Apr-16 19:15:15

I would scrap the cot and try the toddler bed

curiousmonkey Tue 26-Apr-16 20:28:02

He was tired tonight, so I tried putting him in the cot awake, and staying there cuddling him while he stood up. He got so hysterical within a couple of minutes he couldn't breathe, so got him out, cuddled him on the chair in his room and he was fast asleep within 5 minutes. Successful transfer to cot so we'll see how long he lasts. We can't get a mattress for the toddler bed till the weekend unfortunately, but really hope it helps!

curiousmonkey Fri 29-Apr-16 22:19:36

I'm convinced this is separation anxiety now. He has gone to sleep on a mattress on the floor for the past few nights with me in the room, but not touching him or interacting in any way. He will then wake up at 11.45 screaming and crawling down the hallway. We then settle back to sleep in his own room on the floor or mattress, but then an hour later when it happens again bring him into our bed where he sleeps till morning and wakes up very happy. Tonight I'm trying sleeping on the floor in his room when he wakes up as I don't want to make it a habit coming into our bed. We'll see how that goes!

curiousmonkey Sun 22-May-16 19:21:31

Just thought I'd update this thread, as it's frustrating when people don't!

We moved into the toddler bed after 2 weeks of waking up twice a night, and to start with had no difference overnight, just he was able to get out of bed so I'd meet a crying toddler on the landing for 2 weeks. However, there were massive improvements in going to sleep, he's happy to lie down on his bed and settle himself to sleep with us in the room, but not having to pat or anything. The first couple of weeks I'd kneel on the floor and put my head on his bed to show him what to do, but I don't need to do that now.

He has slept through more nights than not in the past week! Let's hope it continues. He has just moved up into the toddler room at nursery, and they seem to be a lot more active than baby room so maybe that's why he's sleeping a bit better as well, it does seem to coincide with the sleeping a bit better overnight.

Now the next challenge is to get back to putting him in bed and leaving the room while he gets to sleep. We're still having to stay in the room at the moment, and it's taking anywhere between 10 and 40 minutes to get to sleep, with lots of getting in and out of bed. It's so much better anyway.

curiousmonkey Fri 03-Jun-16 21:18:18

Today was a momentous day - I managed to leave his bedroom when he was still awake and he put himself to sleep! He also slept through the night last night!

It's my birthday today - what a lovely present! :-)

MYA2016 Sat 04-Jun-16 09:00:11

Well done OP. Glad you have seen a big improvement :-)

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