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Please help me get my 12 month old to sleep stop the night feed!

(8 Posts)
snowydrops Wed 06-Apr-16 22:08:09

DD2 is almost 13 months old. For a long time (6-9 months age) she often slept through (I would say 5 nights out of 7) and now she wakes up at least once, sometimes twice. A typical day is like this:

7-7.15 am - wakes. Plays in cot short time
8am - breakfast, usually not much but maybe a yoghurt, some cheese and fruit (will not take milk at this time)
9.50 - 6oz milk (formula or cows milk)
10am - nap, normally an hour, but often 40 mins
12.30- lunch, sometimes eats a sandwich or pasta and eats well, sometimes eats little (can't work out why!)
2pm - 6oz bottle (trying to stop her having this but sometimes she still wants it)
2.30pm - nap, usually 30 mins, often in car / on go buy even in cot it rarely longer
5.15 - tea, normally eats loads, same quantity at this time as my 4 yr old plus fruit and yoghurt
Bath
6.30 ish - 8oz bottle
7 - sleep, let her settle self buy often cries to sleep or sort of just passes out with tiredness!
12-2am - usually wakes once crying and shouting and only way to stop is with milk! I have tried mixing with water and reducing milk and she throws the bottle away! She also thrashes around and is generally unhappy until she is fed. Often will drink 5-7oz!
5am - often wakes again and usually leave her to cry (if been fed already earlier). She often cries on and off for 30 mins or so but not too distressed. If very distressed obviously go in and try to calm but usually can avoid that on the second wake

That's it! She's had lots of new teeth and learnt to crawl etc, developed a lot physically but realistically has been waking every night once or twice for milk (!) for 3-4 months now so I'm looking for tips and advice on what the flipping heck we can do!

Otherwise she's absolutely adorable!! But I need more sleep smile

Nan0second Fri 08-Apr-16 10:33:51

Can you wean gently, so 6oz for two nights, then 5, then 4 etc... She'll be hungry at that time so it won't work if you go cold turkey (or will be very very hard!) if she's still waking when you get to 2oz, then go half water and then water only...

Have had friends with good results from this (and this is the bottle version of what we did with my breast fed baby!)

snowydrops Fri 08-Apr-16 17:35:36

Thanks Nano!

For the last two nights I've not given milk, night one she cried and I comforted / held her till she went back to sleep (approx 15 mins) and she was actually quite calm so I was really pleased. She then woke at 6.30 and had her milk so that was great.

Last night was harder, she had possibly eaten less at tea time and then woke at 2am, I comforted her and she went back off to sleep but woke 10 mins later and then cried for about 15 mins (quite loudly!) we stuck it out (wasn't too bad crying and sometimes she does this at nap time) but I felt awful! Anyway she dropped back to sleep and then woke at 6.30 again for her milk, she was ravenous. She's had an extra bottle at 3pm today but obviously I would rather that and we will see how this eve goes!

I kind of thought I would opt for comforting / holding then reducing that to comforting form outside the cot and then move on to (hopefully) a few words.

We will see how tonight is but idea of lessening milk in theory sounds good but on a few occasions I've tried less e.g 5oz and when it ends she just gets very worked up so kind of can't believe it would work but we will definitely consider if the other approach doesn't work after a few more nights!

smile

Nan0second Fri 08-Apr-16 19:05:29

Well cold turkey sounds like it's working great for you! If you've done two nights, 1 or 2 more should do the trick! She will be hungrier in the day though and ravenous at wake up smile
Good luck!

snowydrops Sat 09-Apr-16 18:39:56

Yes last night was good again, left her in the cot and just sat with her for about 20 mins until she was quiet and calm and then left and she slept until 7! Success. Think basically we could have done this three months ago but were possibly contending with teething / learning to crawl but hopefully it's going to work this time!

UmbongoUnchained Sat 09-Apr-16 18:43:38

Trying to do this with my 19 month old too and am totally clueless!!

snowydrops Sun 10-Apr-16 08:36:53

Well umbongo the only thing I can say is that I think we just had to commit to the idea she isn't getting any milk at night ever again! I had geared myself up for hours of soothing / cuddling but in actual fact it's been less every night. Night two was hardest and she was up an hour but last night it was ten mins, DH went in, sat in chair and then left when she was calm and she dropped off. I think she's been ready to drop it for ages as is a good eater but it's always just seemed easier to give a bottle. It's already had a good knock on effect for us as she's hungrier in the day, eating and napping better.

Are you bottle or breast feeding? Good luck with it!!

UmbongoUnchained Sun 10-Apr-16 08:52:22

Bottle feeding. She has about 4 bottles of milk during the night out of habit as for a long time she wasn't eating anything during the day. She's eating again now so I want to stop the mill but it's so hard. If I leave her to cry she would just be sick.

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