If your first was a bad sleeper...

(31 Posts)
Penguin13 Fri 12-Feb-16 21:14:11

....what was your second like? DD 14 mo has never been a great sleeper. Not truly terrible most of the time but equally there have been times that nearly broke me. I think we have had about 5 unbroken nights in 14 mo though we are down to one or two wakes unless illness or teething is involved. We are planning ttc and have recently had a spate of horrible nights with DD having a cough and teething with 4 canines at once. It has set me wondering. I know of course we are not guaranteed a good sleeper this time although frankly I feel that would be a fairer system! but was wondering what people's actual experiences were. I realise that this is not a great way of gathering a representative example and it wouldn't put me off having a second either way (assuming we are lucky enough to conceive) as really these years are the blink of an eye compared to a lifetime just a bit curious nosy.

Peppapogstillonaloop Fri 12-Feb-16 21:15:32

Yep all three of mine have been crap, sorry!

Ihatechoosingnames Fri 12-Feb-16 21:19:08

DS is now 2.4, he woke every 3 hours til he was about 12 months and suddenly started sleeping through the night. The first year was hell.

DD is 4 months, she has slept through the night since about 5 weeks old. Sleeps from about 8.30pm, I give her a dream feed at about 11.30pm when I go to bed and she will usually sleep til about 8am. Now and again she will fuss at about 5am but I just pat her back to sleep.

I've done the same routine for both of them so it's just the way they are naturally.

Penguin13 Fri 12-Feb-16 21:20:24

Hehe that's ok weeps silently and rocks in corner grin Really interested in real experiences and not just what I hope will happen. Seriously though, who do we petition about the equitable division of crap nights?

Penguin13 Fri 12-Feb-16 21:23:28

irate yay for you! You even get to avoid being unbearably smug as you know it is luck of the draw smile

MrsJayy Fri 12-Feb-16 21:26:40

I think Dd1 was at school so 5 before she had a full night nornal 8 till 8 kind of sleep dd2 could sleep on a knives edge its just your luck I think

IsItMeOr Fri 12-Feb-16 21:27:25

I can't remember when we finally got an unbroken night of sleep with DS. He didn't sleep reliably well until he was 4yo.

He is definitely remaining an only!

BackforGood Fri 12-Feb-16 21:27:28

All 3 of mine were completely different.
Indeed, it wasn't until I had dc2 that I found out that all babies didn't stay awake for 2 hour session x twice a night, and that some would have a feed and just go back to sleep shock.
dc3 never went to sleep until about 11pm, but she then went thru from a very early age smile

Hamsolo Fri 12-Feb-16 21:30:03

Oh I hope it's different second time around! DC1 has only just started sleeping through at 3!

Felyne Fri 12-Feb-16 21:36:22

Second one slightly better but still not a 'good' sleeper. I'm envious of those people whose babies (and young children!) sleep from 6.30pm for 12 or 13 hours straight!

cornishglos Fri 12-Feb-16 21:37:11

Dc1 woke frequently every night for the first year. Dc2 is only 3 months but has woken only once a night from about 6 weeks with the occasional sleep through (11-6) x

Ludways Fri 12-Feb-16 21:38:33

Ds bad sleeper, still a bad sleeper at 14.
Did great sleeper, still a great sleeper at 10.

Lexipedia Fri 12-Feb-16 21:40:18

First didn't sleep at all during the day or more than two hours at night until about 14 months.

Second has always been much better, and now regularly sleeps through at 4 months.

FoxesSitOnBoxes Fri 12-Feb-16 21:43:49

DD reeeeeeeeaaaaalllllly bad. Worst child I've known in real life. Slept through for the first time at 18 months. Before then would wake up ten trillion times a night
DS slept through from (no joke) his first day of life. I had to set an alarm to wake up to feed him overnight. Then he hit 4 months and stopped being amazing but you could not meet more different babies. I did baiting differently

SansaClegane Fri 12-Feb-16 21:44:36

My first was angelic. Slept through (full on 10-12 hours) from around 8 weeks. I smugly thought parents whose babies don't sleep well must clearly be doing something wrong!
Then along came my second. He just would.not.sleep - had to co-sleep just to get a little bit if sleep myself, cried constantly when I put him down, woke up tons, struggled to nap; when he was older we had to stay with him till he went to sleep, and he'd come into our bed in the middle of the night throwing himself around so I couldn't sleep. Finally slept through the night at 3 1/4 YEARS.
By that time, DC3 had appeared and was also not sleeping through, but I was so used to the sleep deprivation by then and had to get up for DC2 anyway, that I didn't mind. I mentally prepared myself for another two or so years of sleepless nights, but he was never as bad as DC2 and once I weaned him off at 13m, he slept through. No trouble going to sleep either, or being left in his own bed / bedroom. Sometimes he even sleeps 13-14 hours!

So IMO there's no magic recipe for a good sleeper, I never treated any of them differently yet they all had different sleep needs.

FoxesSitOnBoxes Fri 12-Feb-16 21:46:00

Baiting?? Nothing. I did nothing differently

Peppapogstillonaloop Fri 12-Feb-16 22:02:27

I was the same with all 3, my girl slept badly for first year, then better but still badly until about 2.5 when she sorted herself out.. My second slept really well until 6 months and it all went tits up, he's nearly 4 and while he does now sleep through mostly he is often to be found in or bed in the morning.
Number 3 is 11 months and crap! But was amazing til about 5 months now will only sleep in my bed and is up loads in the night.
No helpful tips sorry grin

janethegirl2 Fri 12-Feb-16 22:06:27

My first slept well from 5 weeks, the second was evil, only 2 hours between feeds day and night. Slept through about 5 years old!

Penguin13 Fri 12-Feb-16 22:18:49

Ooh lots of responses whilst I was distracted watching first dates. Not sure if I find it comforting or not that it seems to be luck of the draw rather than anything you can do to influence it!

Penguin13 Fri 12-Feb-16 22:21:40

Lalala Janethegirl not listening. Jams fingers firmly in ears grin

BeaufortBelle Fri 12-Feb-16 22:35:58

Hmm

DS: From about five weeks slept from about 11.30 until about 5.45. And then we tried to get him to go down at 8ish and sleep until the morning. Ha, ha, ha, ha. It took us at least a year to realise he didn't actually need much sleep and that if we didn't want him up between 2am and 5.30am it was best to put him to bed when we went to bed. This was his pattern. He never needed to be asleep before 10.30 and was always up in the morning. Sometimes at bedtime I was near to tears because my mouth used to hurt from anwering questions.

DD: Ah, never the horrendous hours of up all night romping round the room and learning letters and colours in a most precocious way. Always has needed a bit more sleep than DS - like being in bed by 9pm and waking at 7 rather than six! But I don't think she actually slept through until she was about 4 or 5 and as a baby could wake at least three or four times.

Am also adding that both of mine had awful ears from about 7/8 months and I mean ear infection after ear infection, possibly as many as 10 each. DS grommeted at 15 months (and never looked back); DD at 20 months (and never looked back). I remember a horrid patch from early December through to late March with DD where I don't think I got more than two hours sleep lying down because the only way she would settle was upright in my arms in the nursing chair.

I don't think I had many unbroken nights for about eight years.

Eventually OP they turn into teenagers and when you are lying in bed with your phone under your pillow texting your DS who is waiting for the night bus on his own in Lewisham and you are sick with worry you will dream of those days when they were keeping you awake in the night but safe behind their cot bars where no harm could come to them.

Sorry - hardened old gimmer emoticon required.

rosieliveson1 Fri 12-Feb-16 22:42:04

My first was an awful sleeper from the minute he was born. He is gone 2 now and still up more than once in the night, being put back to bed or coming in ours or just having a little scream <oh the joys> My second is 3 months old. He didn't sleep well for the first three days or so and I was horror struck. Thought it was double trouble for sure! However, he gradually started sleeping longer and longer between feeds and now does a good 6-8 hour stretch at 3 months old. It's been this way for a while now and I touch wood every time I say it smile
I honestly believe it's the luck of the draw.

SweetAdeline Fri 12-Feb-16 22:42:39

Dd was a brilliant sleeper as a newborn. Then barely slept at all from 4months-3yrs. She still wakes now pretty frequently with nightmares etc.
Ds was a terrible newborn and I thought I was in for years more of sleep deprivation but something changed at about 12 weeks and he's been great ever since. He's two now and asks to go to bed after lunch for his nap and after dinner. I also have to wake him in the morning. I'll never make the mistake of thinking things can't change, but he just seems to quite like going to sleep whereas his sister really fights it.

Penguin13 Fri 12-Feb-16 22:52:13

The one saving grace is that at least if we struggle with sleep with number 2 we won't have been lulled into a false sense of security! Definitely in no way wishing a bad sleeper on my friend who has been ridiculously lucky with sleep this time round. Nope. Unless....whispers...number 2 is worse??!!!

StarOnTheTree Fri 12-Feb-16 23:33:50

3 bad sleepers here but DD1 was the worst. Quite big gaps between the 3 DC so I had 14 years of broken nights except for a 6 month break between DC 2 & 3 sad

On the upside toilet training was a piece of cake with all 3 (not relevant to this thread I know!!)

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