9 day old sleeping on my chest every night... feeling so guilty(23 Posts)
My baby boy (breastfed) is very happy and content and will fall asleep very easily but will not go down at night anywhere but my chest.
We have a snuzpod on my side of the bed with the side dropped down and I face him, pat his tummy etc. I let him fall into a deep sleep on me but as soon as I move him he wakes and cries. If I leave him on me he'll sleep 3-4 hrs straight. He won't lie flat in our bed either, just on his front on my chest. Every day I keep thinking he'll sleep in it tonight but he doesn't. I had a cesarean so this isn't helping with my pain either.
I've not stopped crying since I woke up this morning. Thought the snuzpod would be great but he's just not interested and I'm so worried something will happen to him
Have you tried swaddling him gently In a blanket? It can help them to feel secure and stops their arms from flailing around and waking himself up. Wrap him after the feed and pop down. I've fostered lots of newborns and as I'm not allowed to let them sleep in my bed it has always worked. Gently stroke his tummy etc. Worth a try
Mine used to sleep on my chest. How alert are you? I used to wake if he moved. It didn't last too long, 9 days is very early! Can you investigate safer co sleeping methods?
Swaddling worked for us.
Gently warming their crib with a little hot water bottle also helped.
I friend had good success with putting one of those flat teddies up her jumper for a while and them popping it in the cot (comforting smell)
Don't feel guilty, your baby is only 9 days old - he'll move to sleeping in a cot eventually, it can take a little time though.
I might be he hates being on his back. Some parents try side position as a compromise if it persists. Nothing will happen to him on your chest. All the ideas here seem worth a try but do be reassured that all over the world babies are sleeping snug and warm and happy like like this.
Also I heard was that you bwed to wait 20 mins after they fall aseep to try and move them as that is when they leave REM sleep and move into deep sleep.
Well you can't blame him, he's in the fourth trimester. He's spent his whole life listening to your heartbeat and breathing so it's soothing for him. We birth our babies too early because of their big heads, they should really cook for longer.
I definitely would try a swaddle to stop his arms moving about and walking him up, plus a tight swaddle can help with comforting them like when they were in the womb.
DS was the same at that age. We lured him into his Snuzpod through warming it with a hot water bottle and using my pregnancy pillow to make him feel more cocooned. Google a Sleepyhead for the effect we were aiming for, a couple of our friends have them and rave about them.
Within a few weeks, he was at least starting the night in it..
Hi it'll get better. Our DS now 8 months spent the first 8 weeks sleeping on mine or DHs chest. It's normal although terrifyingly exhuasting. He eventually loved to sleep in his Snuzpod. I agree with the swaddling also babies smell you so I used to put used breast pads under his bed sheet/muslin or mine or DHs clothing. Also warm the Snuzpod by placing a hot water bottle in it first.
I remember this with all three dc's I remember gripping dc1 so tight (all day and night) I had to get physiotherapy on the tendons in my hand
My DS was the same when he was small, I think they seek comfort from you and have a deeper sleep listening to your heartbeat and breathing patterns, although I'm now pg again and I am going to try my best to get LO to sleep as we got very little sleep for the first few months and it was hard to get DS to eventually sleep in his own room, we were still having problems when he reached 4! Have you tried a crib/cot with a drop down side that attaches to the bed? You could put baby on your side and leave your arm in the crib for comfort.
Crumbles the OP has already stated she has a Snuzpod
Lots of good advice here MYA. My DS is 10 weeks and still prefers to sleep on my chest at night. But we have got him in the snuzpod for 3-4 hours occasionally using the tips above. It gets better I promise--it's really early days and I'm sure I felt much as you did then.
I had a similar set up and fed the baby with us both lying down and me leaning in and then gradually wriggling away. Then their mattress is warm because they are already on it. You can put your hand on thier tunny too so they can feel you there.
It's so tiring and hard to believe it won't be like this always but it will change. Good luck.
Buy a Ewan the Sheep NOW!
We have one but got it a bit too late for the whole heartbeat thing.
When you say he won't go down what do you mean? He cries when you put him in the Snuzpod?
Roll up a towel and bend it into a U shape and put underneath a sheet in the snuzpod. So when you put him down it will feel enclosed.
Tuck a blanket over tight.
Use a Ewan the sheep or get an app on your phone that plays white noise.
Perserve!! I know it's the easiest thing to do to co sleep but you will end up exhausted.
We just kept putting DS down in the snuzpod, doing the same thing, sometimes hold his hand.
It gets better- then we put the side up about 6 weeks when he wasn't waking so much as he was trying to play instead of sleep. Then at 9 weeks we moved it away a bit.
He sleeps through now, just keep doing the same thing each night and they will soon get it.
Thanks for all your advice. He seems to hate swaddling but will try again with it. White noise works in the day but seems to have no affect at night.
We're considering a Sleepyhead or Cocoonababy does anyone have any experience of these? I will also try the breastfeeding lying down and the hot water bottle.
We had a Cocoonababy for DS, purchased in desperation when he was 2 months old. It was amazing and he went from sleeping on me for all naps to snoozing in it, and sleeping in it at night. Well, a bit more than he had been anyway.
They are expensive though and don't last long, but we did sell ours on.
Most babies do cry when they are first swaddled but then relax and calm down...I am talking from theory not practice!
Don't bother with £100 sleepyhead just use a towel and save the money!
He's only 9 days old you need to stick with something rather than lots of different things. Just because you put him down and he starts to cry doesn't mean you move onto the next thing. Just keep trying. Otherwise it gets confusing an he will never get used to all the different things.
Feed him lying down in your bed, side by side, and then you can roll away when he's asleep. Never have to worry about putting him down and him waking up. If he's not fully asleep when you move, he'll just suckle a bit more and go to sleep. Cosleeping is the only way imo! I have coslept with DD since she was born, even in hospital. You'll get more sleep than you ever thought possible. My only suggestion for investing in something is a video monitor so that if you want to put him to bed in the evening and go downstairs you can keep a really close eye on him.
Both of mine slept on my chest for the first 3/4 weeks before transitioning to the moses basket. Go with your instinct and you won't go wrong!
Dc3 is still sleeping on me at nearly 5 weeks.
He will if I am lucky spend the first few hours in his snuzpod. I find when he is feeding I can't stay awake and nod off. I am a light sleeper though and support him with my hands and feeding cushion. Better than no sleep!
I tried a million different fail safe ideas and ended up going with co sleeping and I love it. Don't know if it's an option for you but if you're happy and baby is happy I wouldn't rock the boat.
Why don't you try swaddling him, let him fall asleep on your chest and then when asleep move him into a cradling position in your arms for 5-10 mins then put him in his bed. Moving him from being on your chest to on his back straight away will wake him up. If you are cradling him and then slowly lay him in his bed it may be an easier transition for him.
I also highly recommend warming his bed with a hot water bottle like other people have mentioned.
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