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3 1/2 year old started waking in night.. Knackered!!

(7 Posts)
jakey10 Mon 28-Dec-15 08:26:27

Help! My 3 1/2 year old slept great and didn't wake in night. However for last few months he has started waking 3 or 4 times in night. Sometimes says he needs wee, sometimes too hot too cold, needs drink! Have tried using clock with night light, making sure he uses toilet before bed & not too much milk, even has new bed now as we had spare one with good mattress. Can't think what else to try. Is it a developmental phase that will pass or is sleep training needed? Any ideas or if anyone has similar please advise!! Thanks!

FATEdestiny Mon 28-Dec-15 10:01:45

Firstly I'd consider scared of the dark so consider a night light. After that I'd go zero tolerance at this age. Wake him when you go to bed for a wee so that that cannot be an issue, tell him no drinks allowed at night (if drinking enough fluids in daytime no reason for nighttime thirst) and then just keep returning to bed. Tell him you expect him to stay in bed snd stay quiet, praise when he does and rerun to bed/ignore when he doesn't

jakey10 Mon 28-Dec-15 13:19:26

Ok great, thank you. We got a clock that glows in night and turns green when it's OK to wake, so that is like a night light. Should you not have eye contact or speak when returning to bed? Tried that and failed miserably last night. Last night was worst, but it was first night in big single bed rather than cot bed which may have caused him to be disturbed? Off to parents tomorrow so different bed again. Once back I think we will try properly but good to know exactly what to try (& be consistent... Mr I!) thanks

Nanofone Mon 28-Dec-15 14:04:57

Please don't avoid eye contact etc. If you woke up distressed in the night would you want to be ignored? You wouldn't ignore or leave an elderly relative to cry in the night - how can anyone think it's ok to do this to a child ? Parenting is a 24 hour job - so much harder when the care and concern is needed in the night, but that's part of the deal.

FATEdestiny Mon 28-Dec-15 15:46:11

Should you not have eye contact or speak when returning to bed?

I think the Super Nanny official way of doing Rapid Return (which is what this is) is supposed to involve minimal talking or eye contact. I wouldn't be that uncaring to any of my children that way though.

If it was my child and he got up I would try to get to him at the door to his room (or as soon as you can possibly get to him) and turn him around "Come on sweetheart, back to bed". Put him in bed, cuddle and tuck in. Kiss and "Nan night, sleep time now. Please stay in bed and stay quiet like we talked about". Shut door and leave.

Repeat, repeat, repeat as many times as necessary. He would soon get it and accept he needs to stay in bed and stay asleep at night. The key is being consistent.

jakey10 Mon 28-Dec-15 18:35:27

Thanks all. I find the super nanny approach a bit harsh too, but have tried so many approaches I don't know what's best! Anyway after our break away will try again & like you say be consistent & stick with it. Thanks for tips ;)

bettybyebye Fri 01-Jan-16 08:17:13

No advice but we're in exactly the same boat so keen to know if you've had any success yet?! Our 3.1yr old always slept through until around 2 months ago - he now comes through to our room in the middle of the night every night! Unfortunately we have got into the habit of letting him stay in our bed with DH, whilst I have been in the spare room with 5 month old DD (who currently sleeps far better than her big brother!) as this seemed the best way to maximise sleep for all of us. However DD has just gone into her own room at night so think now is the time to tackle DS...

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