20 week old only sleeping 20 mins at a time(3 Posts)
looking for support/advice please!
I feel like I've gone wrong somewhere along the line.
My dd (only) is 20 weeks today, ebf on demand. She is very sensitive/cranky which I think is due to her being overtired.
We have a sidecar crib with a sleepyhead inside which she goes in at the start of bedtime and for naps. We fell into co sleeping after I'd fall asleep feeding her during the night. She used to sleep 7-2, wake for a feed and go back down into her crib without too much fuss. She would then wake again at 4 for a feed, then sleep another four sometimes five hours. (Usually in bed with us). Bedtime routine has always been bath (5.30), massage, pjs, grobag, white noise thingy, feed to sleep by 6.30pm
It all changed around 3.5 months when she started being more awake in the day and started waking a bit more erratically during the night.
I started encouraging her to nap downstairs in the sleepyhead during the day but she would only go for 30 mins 3 times a day. I realised it wasn't enough and she was distracted so started to put her upstairs for naps, she still only slept 30 mins but woke happy so thought it was enough. However, she was tired again pretty quick.
Both day and night time sleep have slowly gotten worse and last night and night before she woke every 20 mins until I got her in our bed at about 11pm where she slept better. To settle her back down, I have been going in, speaking to her softly, shh and rock the crib then she goes back to sleep. Then I put monitor on and leave the room.
I spent last week getting her to nap longer by any means necessary (long drives in the car with dp, long walks in pram, and she can sleep on me for up to two hours if rocked/sung to). It definitely helps her mood but it's not sustainable, I'm not getting anything done.
This morning she woke about 5.30 and we got up around 6. Took her upstairs when she showed sleepy cues at about 7. I fed her to sleep. She slept for 20 mins. I spent next 40 mins rocking, shhing and resting my hand on her trying to get her to sleep longer. She wasn't settling so I got her up. After a bit of quiet playtime downstairs I tried again but resorted to rocking/singing (she fights sleep but will eventually settle this way.) 11am she finally went to sleep on me, where she still is now! Other things to mention,
she isn't interested in a dummy, (tried lots of times).
I couldn't get on with the sling (nct caboo).
My health visitor is useless.
I'm not thinking about weaning just yet.
Is it worth seeing the gp? Is it just a growth spurt/regression that she will just grow out of? Is it worth sleep training? I've been (trying to) read the book baby whisperer solves all your problems. I don't really know where to begin with it all. Any advice much appreciated. Sorry for ramble. TIA
Hi, I can't answer all your questions but I think short naps at that age are very common. Certainly the case with my 5mo. Do what you can to get them to have some sleep as I really believe that the more sleep dd has in daytime, the better she settles at night. Then I think it's a patience game, a lot of babies just take a while to learn how to extend their naps.
Not sure about nighttime sleep. The only thing that struck me is that could you have kept her in bed this morning rather than getting up? It might take some perseverance but if you can convince her it's not daytime yet then she might resettle better in the morning getting both of you some sleep.
Good luck and sorry I don't have all the answers!
Touchacat thanks very much for your reply. She usually wakes at 4 or 5 ready for the day and somehow we both go back to sleep (don't know how it happens! I'm guessing she's more relaxed in the big bed next to me!) this morning though she needed her nappy done and dp was getting up anyway, so we were already pretty much up! I don't feel too tired myself just feel she is very unsettled and feel like she's not getting quality sleep! And I miss having a few hours in the evening to myself/ time in the day to do anything whatsoever! 😁
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